I buy books I never read …

[cantthinkofaname1991]

Ok, I stole the thread title from an old Maximo Park song, but it pretty much sums up my problem. I buy books after much research and deliberation which want to read, but I never do ..and then I feel badly. I pay for apps/ fitness online as this will be my motivation to lose weight and make changes in my diet.. only to do one or two days then stop (but I carry on the subscriptions). Every year I buy a journal (the expensive, motivational kind where you write your goals and aims and achievements) only to never fill it in… I am bored in my work but I can’t find the impetus to make a change. I feel like I am constantly battling my own brain as I WANT to do something but as soon as I have the book/ journal/fitness app, I lose all energy to actually do it. Why is this??? I am very frustrated with myself

I do this. I suspect I have undiagnosed ADHD. Someone at work told me I was demand avoidant, and I sniggered to myself because I’d already downloaded an article about demand avoidance because i thought it would be helpful…and then I didn’t read it.

Be kind to yourself. If you don’t want to read or exercise or journal, then don’t. I’m sure you’re doing fine.

Thanks @Hobbes8 funnily enough - I am actually going through the ADHD referral process at the moment although (again, ironically) I filled out half the online forms but haven’t actually completed them. I don’t even know if I would take medication if I do have it or if it would even help? I guess I decided to look at a diagnosis just to see if I do have it for my own interest and not really to share or take any action on.

I’m not very good at being kind to myself, I beat myself up a lot over these things which is why it’s really annoying and exhausting!

There are 2 types of book buyers, the collectors and the readers. You are either one or the other.

So do I, with Kindle books when the books I want to read are 99 p.

But it's not all bad as we're practicing the Japanese art of Tsundoku.

www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/world-44981013.amp

@Bjorkdidit 😂 I’d never heard of that!

Are you me? For the MP lyrics and also the problem stated. Also recently diagnosed ADHD, although not sure that really is the problem but whatevs.

Do you generally put pressure on yourself? It's hard to explain but I think it might be a perfectionism thing with moi.

I.e. I'm only satisfied if I have read the whole book and remembered it all and learned it and enjoyed it etc. if it doesn't work out j feel like a failure and i hate feeling like that because i have perfectionist issues.

therefore j tend to avoid putting effort into things often ti avoid the inevitable feelings of inadequacy ad failure.

but j marvel at other people who seem tk plod through life getting it all wring and imperfect but still feel happy and confident.

I also do this and suspect undiagnosed ADHD

I do exactly that too - and also suspect I have ADHD. Although I’m 50 now so probably won’t seek a diagnosis. I was smart in school and did well but remember crying because I had no idea what class I had just been in - as in what subject. , let alone what we learnt! I’m a disaster at admin - and get really overwhelmed and burnt out by it. Also seem to be constantly doing stuff around the house but it never ever looks clean and tidy. I’m exhausted by it ( but can’t get around to arranging a holiday!)
Althogh I’m better if I’m held to account - what about a book club?

Because we live in a consumer society.
We are bombarded with "if you just buy this your life will be great, or better"

Instead of adverts during tv programmes when you used to go wee or boil kettle we carry these mobile phones and let companies harvest our data so they can advertise to us personally, which means you want or think you need more and more and more. It's crazy. Even decluttering, minimalist sites suggest you buy a whole heap of matching storage jars first.

I used to buy many more books than I was reading but decided 2 years ago, or so possibly longer now, that I was going to start reading them, I initially said, 2 out 1 in, I pass on a lot of what I read, there's always something new. I started re-reading by beginning with an "easy read" short novel. And it's been great. I haven't stopped completely buying books, but it's about 5 out 1 in now, and have read much exciting, entertaining, informative and inspiring pages since starting. It's much better than just buying.

I made a decision to stop being just a consumer of items, because that's all a book or notebook is until you use it, and became a consumer of stories, knowledge. Put the mobile down and pick a book up.

Also known as emotional support books

'nuff said!

Ah the book stack of hope. I hope I will read them one day. My concession is I only buy from charity shops so I don't pay full price. I found getting books out from the library helpful too as there is a deadline. I have to read the book before the due date (or at least the first irritated email that it's overdue). Solidarity!

well ADHD but also you're not a bookworm you're a book dragon!! The books are your hoard 📚🐉

(I solved this problem by using the library )

✨ADHD✨

I'm the same, diagnosed in adulthood. I too am a book dragon, journal dragon, and pointless apps I've used twice and then forgotten about dragon.

I defeated my job boredom though but now am unfortunately also a job dragon and change jobs regularly after 15 years in the same role. Who knew you could hoard jobs.

Me too. I do read the books, eventually, but the apps and notebooks of doomed good intentions - c’est moi. Also strongly suspect ADHD.

@bottomsup12 this is really interesting… think you might be right about the perfectionism thing and I definitely put a ton of pressure on myself, I hadn’t thought about it before! I think that’s why I feel so bad about it!!!

Interesting that lots of people are also saying ADHD… maybe I need to finish my referral 🙈 why do they make the referral questions so long winded, it’s a paradox as most people (like me!) will get distracted and not complete them!!!

@MonsteraMama how did you defeat your job boredom??

I just came by to say I love Maximo Park.

I do this. Diagnosed ADHD

Urrgh don't @cantthinkofaname1991, same here.

Bought 3 non fiction books this week which should be fascinating, if I ever get around to reading them. So, tsundoku. What does the tsun bit mean @Bjorkdidit?

EDIT: sorry the article says to pile up. See, I can't even read an article properly 😳