I want to stay positive.

[Imnotbad]

Don't know if this will make sense. But litterly everything I post is negative it's either to do with complex life struggles. Some times im very on edge etc .

More recently I decided I deserve better . The problems are still there but I plan on keeping them at arms length. And focusing on more positive things and not let things eat me up .

My kids have been away for almost a week. They will be back on Tuesday. So I was really looking forward to it. Thought I will decorate the small bedroom which is 70% there but I have not touched it for 2 days . I'm meant to be tidy up cleaning sorting all the house. But in a positive way. No slagging myself of etc.

This is going to sound so stupid . But I had an appointment yesterday late afternoon. And leaving my house has totally thrown me of . My motivation. Positive mind set . Has taken a dip. Even though i want to feel positive and motivated. I feel like I would have been ok had I not left the house.

I have been posting crap as well just to occupy my mind a little even if its silly stuff.

I really want to lift myself again to have that positive mind set to say to myself let's do this and it feels good and not a sluggish chore

It would ne so easy to slip back into negative stuff but I really don't want to 😭

I h

Write it in a journal or if you have the urge to post go and do something productive like some housework or make a cake or go for a walk or play a game with the children.

It sounds like you were really pleased with how you were doing until you got thrown by the appointment. Is there anything you can do to get back to that feeling? Any kind of healing/recovery is always going to have dips but that doesn't mean you're not making progress.

I think you have totally misunderstood me.

I don't know to be honest . I mean I have done some stuff today. But not enough. It just feels very sluggish. Thinking about it I only slept for 4hrs last night so maybe I will feel better tomorrow after proper sleep.

Posting stuff where? On MN?

4 hours sleep, you must be exhausted! Go and have a bath, read a book for listen to a podcast and go to bed. Tomorrow everything will look brighter.

I don't do reading or pod cast I don't want to hear stuff I'm kind of enjoying the silence. I guess i will just chill out a bit. Maybe just potter about if I feel to. And start fresh tomorrow. I will probably wake 8ish so I will have the fall day .

I don't think I have. You're having a whinge about things that you may be better off journalling.

OP do you have a diagnosis? I ask because you say you're sometimes very on edge, have complex life struggles and post very negative things. Do you think you might be depressed or suffering from anxiety? Perhaps it's worth seeing your GP?

I think you should think about three positive things that have happened during the day, every night before you go to sleep.

It might be something as simple as ‘none of the kids came home sick/covered in mud/having lost their PE kits etc’ or ‘I really enjoyed that ten minutes silence while everyone was still asleep’. And on the truly bloody shit days, it might be ‘I made it to bed time, the kids are all alive and well, tomorrow is a new day’. But three things, every single day. I think it will get you thinking about the nice things that have happened each day, that you might overlook because you’ve got lots of negativity going on.

So today, you’ve enjoyed the silence and you’ve done some stuff even though you’ve only had four hours sleep. That’s bloody brilliant, I’d have been sleeping all day! Only one more thing to think of.

Maybe read the advice given in all your previous threads?

Where are you posting this and is it posting on social media you mean? Yes, as the previous poster said, some people want to share all that goes through their mind hour by hour ( but it really does not make a good impression! ), so they just sit down and write to themselves. Journal, email it to you, whatever

Some people buy workbooks and sign to websites which coach you in the area you are struggling with and take time to sit down, ponder and jot down things in workbook, which helps immensely: first you jot the negative, ponder through and through what makes you feel this way, what lessons you need to learn, then you go into the positive outcome you want to achieve, jot that down also, make a plan and follow in real life not only with positive thinking, but practical steps also. Good luck

No you have . Its me writing it. So I know if you have misunderstood what I have wrote

Why does your thinking just have to be negative or positive? Sometimes all that's necessary is indifference and that's perfectly fine. We can't be positive and motivated all of the time, that's just not possible. On off days, indifference will do just fine. Giving no fucks is quite often the answer.

Perhaps journal it so fools like me can't misunderstand then.

No . It' feels hard to explain. The things that go on are not actually my stuff as such. But because it stems from my adult children/older children and its all very complex. Alot of the stuff still falls in me because of how things word set with professionals and all the worry and knock on effects etc . It's beeb mentally exhausting and I have needed to step back for Mt owm mental health and well being apart of that for me is to try and be more positive and keel tjat bad bits at arms length. Which is what in trying to do.

It's not just you OP. If I have an appointment or need to do something like a food shop I can never settle down to housework or decorating, usually because I'm clock watching, and by the time the appointment has gone I'm too unsettled to get stuck back in. That day is usually a write off for big jobs so I use it to catch up on a load of laundry and ... nope, that's it, just laundry.

Yes that's exactly what I'm trying to do . Thank you for getting it . I want to try and keep that mind set .

Oh . I thought I was being odd. I'm sort of glad to gear that .