My brother is 50 and has some undiagnosed mental health issues, and I believe personality disorder also. He is very depressed and a difficult person to be around. He is very angry and aggressive.
He has cut me off (he lives a couple of hours away with his wife, who also has mental health problems). And neither I, nor our other siblings, have heard from him since 2021.
My mum is still in touch with him, and he phoned her regularly to rant, and shout at her
She recently confided in me that my brother has cancer. I made her tell me because I could tell something was troubling her. He has told her not to tell anyone or he will cut contact with her too.
I cannot tell anyone. She has asked me to keep it to myself. I am glad she has told me, because it was clearly a massive burden for her. But now I am struggling too. My brother might die, and I cannot contact him, or my other siblings. What if something happens and they find out that I knew. It's such an awful situation.
I love him, but he is so broken and won't seek any help. I am very angry with him, but I know that he didn't choose any of this.