I am not sure why they think wanting to be fed regularly by itself would be a symptom. When you have a CMPA/reflux baby that's the absolute least of your problems.
Mine had constant hiccups, wind that nobody could get out of him, awful constipation that no amount of bicycle legs would solve, poo full of mucous, gunky eyes, smelled of acid constantly, blotchy red skin, and all sorts of other stuff I have repressed.
He needed to be held upright for at least 30 minutes after a feed. He would scream for literally hours. Not a hungry cry but real pained screaming that would make me feel sick. He could never do tummy time (agreed with paediatrician before anyone comes at me) and basically lived vertically in a sling for months.
The experience was bordering on traumatic. The response from medical professionals felt psychopathic, and all of it has really made me hesitant to have another child. In fact after talking to other mums with similar stories, i would be very interested in research on the link between PND and reflux/CMPA.
I have always felt strongly that mums need to be listened to and not dismissed with colic but I also feel a bit offended at your friends thinking that CMPA looks like a newborn waking up to eat regularly. Most of us would have loved nothing more than to have a mostly happy baby who fed regularly and just had a bit of a grumble sometimes.
I'm surprised you know so many people whose babies are diagnosed though. Getting diagnosed was a nightmare. It was only after he dropped 2 centiles and was "failing to thrive" despite drinking 3x and 4x the amount of recommended formula that anyone actually believed us that something was wrong.