How do you know if something is a fantasy or something that you actually want?

[H0PE1]

I am with my husband twenty years. I fantasise about women. I have had two crushes in recent years and both were women.

But I've never even kissed a woman.

How do I know if it's just a fantasy or if I would prefer to be with a woman?

Thank you for any insight

Anyone?

How do I know if it's just a fantasy or if I would prefer to be with a woman?

There is a huge amount of clear, blue water between those things. Do you love your DH, fancy him, like being with him? Because there are a lot of bisexual people in monogamous relationships and those, because you have to pick, are with one sex. You can fancy people of both sexes and still be in a committed relationship.

Thank you. Yes, I suppose I have no idea if I'm bisexual because it might be the case that if I was intimate with a woman in reality, it would not be something I want at all.
I do love him, but sometimes I would fantasise about women when I'm with him IYSWIM.

I feel very much the same as you. I have been thinking about this more deeply for a few months now. I am very happy with DP and my family and enjoy the fantasy side of it, but I don’t know if there is a part of me I’m missing.

I wonder if it doesn’t really matter though? I’m happy with DP and wouldn’t leave him for another person. But if I was single in the future I guess I’d meet a person that I liked, male or female. When I was last single 10 years ago I only considered dating men.

When you were last single were you interested in dating women too, or is this relatively new?

The last time I was single I was 22. I didn't consider women then.
I definitely think that if we were to split up I would be interested in a relationship with a woman. But part of that is to find out if this is real or a fantasy.
I don't think I'd break up with him over this. I do love him.