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Original poster

Can't get this woman out of my head

31 replies

Lopity · 20/08/2024 06:04

I just found out that a woman at work died 6 weeks after being diagnosed with bowel cancer. She was healthy and active, ate well and didn't drink. She didn't have any symptoms apparently. I didn't know her very well but would exchange a few words in the office kitchen etc.

I just can't get this out of my head and feel really anxious and panicky. I'm the same age as her and the thought of leaving my kids and DH is devastating. I have a healthy lifestyle but have had various health issues in the past and having some stomach issues now (bad reflux) which I had investigated (gastroscopy) 18 months ago and it was all fine but I can't stop questioning whether the doctors made a mistake or if it was all fine 18 months ago but has now developed into cancer. I know logically that it's the same symptoms I had 18 months ago when I had loads of tests and my GP has no concerns.

I am an anxious person in general (mainly thanks to childhood emotional abuse) and have had plenty of counselling/CBT in the past. I can usually keep it under control but feel like this has really got to me and I can't think about anything else.

Not really sure what I'm asking here but just wanted to tell someone how I'm feeling.

OP posts:
Gonk123 · 20/08/2024 06:14

Why don’t you go back to the gp and explain what you have just said in here. I think it’s quite reasonable to feel a bit panicky. When something happens to someone else it can make us question things.
are you still having problems with your stomach, what did they put it down to?

Original poster
Lopity · 20/08/2024 06:20

Yes. It's reflux/GERD.

I've had it for years. First diagnosed 5 years ago with a barium swallow as I had a permanently sore throat. Took omeprazole and have been through periods of it getting better so I stop the omeprazole and then it gets worse again so I go back on it. Most recent investigation (gastroscopy and CT scan) was because I was still having pain despite omeprazole. The consultant wasn't a fan of omeprazole and said I should just use Gaviscon. It's generally not been too bad since then but got worse again for the past few months so I'm back on the omeprazole which was helping but I stupidly had a glass of wine a few days ago as was feeling better and it's triggered the pain again. I think I just need to be on omeprazole permanently and not drink at all, but my head is going down scary rabbit holes.

OP posts:
Gonk123 · 20/08/2024 06:28

You can try organic aloe Vera juice to help with reflux.
omeprazole are not ideal for long term use.
what is your diet like? Cook from scratch…ready meals???
have you checked for h pylori?
have you tried probiotics?
it may be dysbiosis where everything is out of whack with gut bacteria.

Original poster
Lopity · 20/08/2024 06:32

My GP was cross with the consultant for putting me off taking omeprazole long term. The concerns are about osteoporosis which can mainly be avoided by supplements but not taking omeprazole when you need it can cause stomach cancer.

I don't eat any (or very minimal) processed food, already drink kefir and eat kimchi. No h pylori.

OP posts:
Sethera · 20/08/2024 06:43

I think it's a mistake to conflate the tragic death of your colleague with your own health problems. You have symptoms and are under investigation. From what you say, your colleague didn't have symptoms (or discern symptoms) until it was sadly too late. You say you didn't know her well, so you don't know her full ,medical history or full details of her lifestyle.

Focus on getting the right treatment for your reflux.

Dibbydoos · 20/08/2024 06:45

Lopity · 20/08/2024 06:20

Yes. It's reflux/GERD.

I've had it for years. First diagnosed 5 years ago with a barium swallow as I had a permanently sore throat. Took omeprazole and have been through periods of it getting better so I stop the omeprazole and then it gets worse again so I go back on it. Most recent investigation (gastroscopy and CT scan) was because I was still having pain despite omeprazole. The consultant wasn't a fan of omeprazole and said I should just use Gaviscon. It's generally not been too bad since then but got worse again for the past few months so I'm back on the omeprazole which was helping but I stupidly had a glass of wine a few days ago as was feeling better and it's triggered the pain again. I think I just need to be on omeprazole permanently and not drink at all, but my head is going down scary rabbit holes.

My friends hubby - high up on the research side of a pharma - said noone should take omeprazole every day forever. He didn't say why just that the drug wasn't designed for everyday use.

I know it's been linked to alzheimers but don't know why or under what circumstances.

GERD can lead to cancer if untreated - stomach acid burns the oesophagus, but youve just been assessed and if that was the case you'd know. Bowel cancer is very different and is not easily detected so a swift death is sadly typical.

I have GERD and will start using gaviscon now you've put that tip in, thanks!

Ive seen quite a few videos on fb recently saying that 80% of the population here has some flora in the gut that causes IBS and GERD. I don't know how to get rid of it because antibiotics don't touch it - but if it's true, there must be a way to get rid of it....

ladyintherain · 20/08/2024 06:57

I think about my death quite a lot. I feel like it will be in old age, but it still doesn't seem like a long time away. I don't know what the answer is but I think it's quite normal

IlkaDoxie · 20/08/2024 07:15

Op, if you don’t have h. pylori your gerd might be caused by a hiatus hernia or weak oesophageal muscles. One of my friends suffered for years with reflux then tried an iqoro training device (just had to Google that!), which has changed her life. Quite weird but it does seem to work for some.

aw212212 · 20/08/2024 07:25

I have ongoing acid reflux issues and try to only take antacids or omeprazole when I really have to, I find if I have a flair up it settles with a couple of cups of Yogi tea alkaline herbs. Probably can be used as a preventative method, but I always forget to drink it until I feel the burn. Worth a try for you.

Original poster
Lopity · 20/08/2024 08:08

I don't have a hiatus hernia as I had a barium swallow and they ruled that out.

I feel like taking/not taking omeprazole is a choice between cancer or dementia/osteoporosis! And getting conflicting advice from GP and consultant doesn't help either.

I will have a look at the tea, thank you.

OP posts:
okydokethen · 20/08/2024 09:49

I think shocking events like this when it's someone you know really brings it home that there are no guarantees in life and that's scary.

Hug your loved ones and be thankful.

Gonk123 · 20/08/2024 10:08

As I said try organic aloe Vera - take a spoonful a day. It’s natural…it’s not going to give you cancer.
why the reluctance…

Disturbia81 · 20/08/2024 10:09

We always look for a cause with younger deaths OP and it's worrying when there isn't one and the person was living healthily. I think about it all the time as I've lost my entire immediate family to cancer but they all smoked and I don't so I find that reassuring. But with your colleagues very quick bowel cancer death there is no reassurance.

sausawyee · 20/08/2024 10:26

@Dibbydoos your post isn't helpful to anyone on this. It's second hand info about your friend's husband. He says .. when did he say it .. he can't make a blanket assessment of anyone. Has there been updates eg? It could be very worrying to OP.

Original poster
Lopity · 20/08/2024 12:11

Gonk123 · 20/08/2024 10:08

As I said try organic aloe Vera - take a spoonful a day. It’s natural…it’s not going to give you cancer.
why the reluctance…

I will have a look for it. Maybe somewhere like Holland and Barratt?

OP posts:
yumyum33 · 20/08/2024 12:31

I now feel anxious that I take Omeprazole 20mg every day and have done for about ten years.

Beforetheend · 20/08/2024 12:33

dd’s school friend’s dm died of an aneurysm when they were 13. It absolutely knocked me sideways, I think, because our situations were so comparable. It really felt like it could just as easily have been me.

Would you consider some grief counselling? It’s not just for close relatives and friends, and it sounds like you have a lot to process here.

In some ways I was more deeply affected by her death than by members of my own family.

Beforetheend · 20/08/2024 12:37

Dh had very similar issues to what you’ve described, was also diagnosed with a hernia and feed and prescribed omeprazole forever. His issues vanished when he lost weight, and he was quite annoyed that no one had suggested that option to him before charging hefty consultant fees! Obviously men and women’s bodies can be very different but I just thought I’d mention it. Although it sounds like healthy eating is already a high priority for you.

Gonk123 · 20/08/2024 22:12

Yes try Holland and Barrett, looks like a really good one here. I actually might try this one myself. You really have to review a lot of supplements etc to make sure there are no nasty fillers nowadays sadly but this one looks great!

https://www.hollandandbarrett.com/shop/product/simplee-aloe-organic-aloe-vera-juice-60040833

have a little read up on it, you’ll be amazed at the healing properties it can offer. I hope it can offer you some help, I really do.

Original poster
Lopity · 20/08/2024 22:57

Thanks so much @Gonk123 I'll order that one.

Have been feeling a bit better throughout the day as have been distracted. It's at night when I wake up at about 4am and start panicking about random things that's the problem! Doesn't help that reflux is worse at night even though I put pillows under the mattress so I'm propped up a bit.

OP posts:
Original poster
Lopity · 20/08/2024 23:03

Do you recommend taking the aloe vera on an empty stomach? Morning or evening? Just once a day?

OP posts:
Bushyandbright · 20/08/2024 23:07

Have a look at the Acid Watcher diet for reflux too. It's a good way to click the reset button on your gut.
You say you eat minimally processed food, but you'd be surprised as to what foods have unnecessary additives/chemicals in. You'd have to be a hermit to not eat any ultra-processed foods... I'm trying to avoid as much as possible and it's incredibly challenging! Almost everything has some sort of acidity regulator too, which could flare up reflux.

Lupina12 · 20/08/2024 23:23

Hi - couldn't read without mentioning that I have your symptoms, and recently started using an Iqoro device, it's helping loads.

It's designed for hiatal hernia treatment, (i don't know if i have one as never been tested) but i wonder if a stronger diaphram would help you anyway....

They are crazy expensive for a little device, but the reviews are incredible so maybe worth a try? I believe they are now prescribed on the nhs but i just ordered mine online. here's the website www.iqoro.com/

Harvestmoon49 · 20/08/2024 23:38

ladyintherain · 20/08/2024 06:57

I think about my death quite a lot. I feel like it will be in old age, but it still doesn't seem like a long time away. I don't know what the answer is but I think it's quite normal

How old are you? I feel like you've just explained exactly how I feel perfectly!

Carebearsonmybed · 21/08/2024 07:30

She would have had symptoms. No need to goes from symptom free to dying of bowel cancer in 6 weeks.

Other cancers, such as pancreatic, sure but bowel cancer is a symptomatic one and a treatable one.