Very light-hearted question to teachers

[Ilob]

Please don't take this seriously but it's something that I've been wondering:

How on earth do you deal with it when a student does a bad fart and the whole class acts up?

Also do you gossip with the other teachers about who "made the bad smell"?

I only ask this cos my DS does this sort of stuff at home

Depends on the pupil and ny relationship with them. Sometimes someone nearby will ask if they can move. If the perpetrator thinks it's hilarious I might threaten anyone acting up that they need to sit near them. Sometimes I will.offer to spray perpetrator with some emergency perfume. We just try and laff it off and move on.

I've taught in Early Years where small children fart ALL THE TIME. If it's particularly smelly, I might say 'does someone need to go and do a poo? There's a bit of a smell in here'. It doesn't cause laughter or an issue though. It's just a bodily function, and young children need to recognise it as part of a bodily process.

I've been known to do the same thing when I've farted, and it's a bad one! 30 small humans to blame it on! 🤣

Haha, internally, I think 'blimey that's a bad one'.
Externally I pretend not to smell it, to save blushes, or if it's unavoidable, I quietly open a window and clamp down HARD on kids making a fuss, as they always make it personal (ewww, John is GROSS) rather than just expressing mild displeasure! I do fall back on 'everyone does it, it's natural, get on with your writing' if I have to!

I used to ignore it. And also clamp down on the kids making a fuss.

Whilst slowly dying inside.

Thanks all for the replies 😁 😁

We definitely don't talk about it with other staff.

9 times out of 10 I pretend I don't smell anything.

Sometimes, if I've got a particularly good relationship with the kids nearest the smell, I might go "ew! Was that you John?! Or was it you Amy?!"

With the very little ones, I might generally announce, "does someone need to go to the toilet?"

We definitely don't discuss it with other staff. It's so common as to be completely uninteresting.

You to read boy by roald Dahl
He describes this to perfection

I teach teens and usually just laugh it off! Tell them to get gas masks out open the door windows and start fanning etc

Depends on the class

I would never be the first to say anything - I'd only react to the pupils.

🤣 I could have written this!

Now I'm wondering. Would you tell a child off?

I assume

Yes - If they did it on purpose to disrupt the class

No - if couldn't help it

I once laughed hysterically at a student farting. She bent down to get something out of her bag and let rip. Everyone laughed (so did she, though she was embarrassed bless her) Then everyone calmed down… but I had completely lost it and couldn’t stop. I felt awful on the poor kid, but I was hysterically crying with laughter. You know when you can’t stop and almost can’t breathe you are laughing that much? I was trying to hide it but I was making a weird ‘wheaking’ noise. Most unprofessional but fortunately everyone saw the funny side!

@Jifmicroliquid lmao. What school year did you teach?

I was secondary and the class was year 10 so 14/15. Lovely quiet kid, very well behaved. That made it even worse!

If it’s just a smell and nobody is claiming it - open a window, acknowledge it for a moment and crack on.

If it’s a deliberate farter - as in a teenager doing it provocatively to test the boundaries, and believe me some (usually boys) absolutely do this - it’s a dead giveaway as they’ll be looking straight at you, grinning, with a “now what’re you gonna do?” facial expression. Your reaction now depends on your relationship with the class, but the absolute worst thing is to get cross with them as you’re giving them the reaction they want. I usually go for the pretend enthusiasm and “congratulations Dylan, that’s the best one I’ve heard year. You should definitely enter the Competitive Farting event next Sports Day” or something similar, and then move them on.

My friend's DD was in Reception and in her first few weeks came home saying "We sat down for story time this afternoon and I farted! But Mummy, NO-ONE laughed!"

She was more incredulous that no-one found it funny, than a fart had escaped her!

I'm loving some of the teacher responses. Going to save some for my DH...

If it was silent, I just ignore it. If it was loud, it depends on the reaction of the child that did it. If they look embarrassed, I pretend I didn't hear it and a stern 'That's enough, thank you' to any child that sniggers.
If the child who did it finds it hilarious, then a brief smile at them, and carry on with the lesson. Either way, I never make a fuss. It's a normal body thing.

Secondary - ignore it, clamp down on any response, continue with lesson.

Depends on the sitch, if the culprit thinks it's hilarious (I teach all boys so usually this!) I'll say something like "what have they been feeding you child x?" "Next time if you could step outside we'd ALL appreciate it!" If it was a silent but violent unclaimed botty bubble I'd pretend I didn't smell it and shh the rest of the boys until they settled again.
To be fair, there is so much happening in a teachers day we probably wouldn't remember that child x farted earlier! 😂