Can’t sleep because I had a disagreement with close friend. Why are you still awake?

[LilasPrettyCafe]

Urgh, I hate it when I get this wound up and my brain won’t switch off. Thankfully I’m not working tomorrow. Why are you awake in the small hours of the night?

Am staying at a friends house and have the window open (facing road). Some late nighters on the way back from town walked past singing (badly) ! So I’m wide awake thinking about my 3 hour drive home later and stuff I need to do when I get home ! Am going to try and get back to sleep …

Up breastfeeding my 3 month old son, hopefully can get back to sleep soon!

I'm at work.

I had an awful dream about my adult DD that I can’t even write down as it’s too traumatising.
The horror actually woke me up!
Hope everyone gets some rest who is not working and hope the workers have a quick shift.

I woke up just before 4am.Think it's because I drank 2 coffees yesterday and the dog isn't here and .The coffee made me super productive yesterday but now here I am exhausted on mumset at almost 5am.Might watch a film.

My dh woke me up when he went to the loo, now he is snoring his head off.

Mid divorce here, under same roof and very toxic. Can't sleep for worrying about the future

Two and a bit hours to go, just made a posh coffee and debating picking up the crochet. I tend to do the proper work early in the shift, while more with it.

Toddler woke me. They're now sound asleep again beside mama. I found out on Friday that a colleague who I had considered a good friend was saying untrue things behind my back. Now I feel paranoid what other colleagues believe and their opinion of me and also sad and upset that my friend is not my friend at all. Can't switch off.

I've got to go for a celebration where my childhood abuser will be. Its eating me up inside

That’s very tough @delilabell . Does anyone know or do you have to be outwardly pleasant?

My beautiful Dad is in hospital. He has rectal cancer and has been suffering from horrible symptoms. He was meant to begin radiation/ chemo on Monday. As the symptoms have been so severe and weakening him, he has to have surgery to have a stoma first before they’ll start the treatment.
Very stressful and worrying time. I suffer with severe anxiety as it is so it’s through the roof at the moment.
Sending love to you all.

Thanks Lila. He would just carry on, even though I feel terribly rejected. He doesn't want to let go of the relationship, or experience those feelings because of the divorce, which I genuinely do understand, but unfortunately the instincts that loving someone give you aren't there to protect the marriage when things go wrong. We have teenagers and I'm menopausal, there's just too much strain on the relationship for it to work.

Doesn't stop me being devastated though.

I hope you can makenup.with your friend.

I got around three hours sleep and woke up feeling sick with anxiety. I’m disappointed with my friend for putting me in this situation. I think we’ll eventually make up but she’s damaged the twenty+ year relationship. It’s made me realise that I can’t be totally open with her about my health/feelings.

It’s not something I talk about very much but I had a nervous breakdown years ago and I’ve learned how to manage my anxiety so I never go back to that place. When I tried to explain this, she got angry and dismissive instead of trying to understand me.

It’s one concert and if I clearly don’t want to go, for whatever reason, I shouldn’t be pressured into it. Going in the huff and deleting me off the event group chat instead of just saying ‘it’s okay, I’m sorry you feel that way, we’ll do something else another time’ is ridiculous.

A couple of others on the group have now privately messaged me to say they think my feelings are valid and they’re sorry she’s reacted this way, which has made me feel a bit better.

p.s. for anyone else who got very little sleep last night, I hope today’s a better time for you and you manage to make it up tonight.

Still here. 13 hours. I've had three coffees, biscuits and breakfast on them, fair play for that but not been examined. Painkillers and one up my bum (tmi) but that's it. When it is reasonable to ask what's next?

You must be exhausted. Why haven’t you been examined yet? No available doctors?

@SleepingStandingUp you're still on a chair?? 😮

Grab someone and ask them what's going on!

@LilasPrettyCafe it should be fine, friend is in an unreasonable strop. They will come around.

@NOTANUM thank you. My parents know but brushed it under the carpet (it happened when I was a child) . Everyone acts like he's amazing too. I honestly don't think I'm going to manage it.

Then don’t go. Your priority is you and your health. I’m really sorry there wasn’t consequences for your abuser. Have you been able to get support from elsewhere? E.g. a counsellor.

@delilabell if you don’t think you can manage it, I think Covid on the day is the only way. You do NOT owe him or your parents to play happy families.

I hit post too soon but I just want to say I’m sorry you had a miserable experience as a child and hope life is okay now. @delilabell

I’m leaving things to calm down but she owes me an apology. I did nothing wrong.

I don't know, it's just very very slow.

Do you have to? Can you pull out? Feign illnesss?

@LilasPrettyCafe the mouse is very cute!

@delilabell you shouldn't have to go through that, cancel