Things your partner/DH does that irritates you

[terracottafarm]

I'll go first, he will walk past the clean washing folded on the stairs. Leave his clothes on the end of the bed and will not put them away for days at a time. Picks his FEET

He only has one walking speed, and it is faster than mine. So he is often way ahead of me when we are out.

Falls asleep really quickly. I'm so fucking jealous 😭

Keeps squirting salad cream at me and laughing.

Mansplains way too much, especially when I'm nearly asleep!

Makes this ‘pooofffff’ noise when he’s asleep. Leaves tea towels screwed up on the kitchen surfaces. Still hasn’t worked out which of the light switches do what so just presses them all repeatedly when it’s time to lock up while grumbling quietly.

”Acquires” the remote control, channel-hops rapidly during ad-breaks
(every bloody ad-break 😡) nods off during programmes, leaving some noisy crap on… then when I pinch the remote back, wakes up and says “I was watching that”

Are you my mum? Because you have just described my dad! 😂

Even when we are watching something, he will muck about with listings and recordings... leaving us watching stuff in a little window in the corner of the TV.

Ex partner- puts TV volume way too loud. Plays annoying rocky/depression music way too loud, walks out the shower completely soaking wet and makes puddles of water everywhere rather than standing on a bathmat, cannot complete a task without listening to music, cannot complete a task in general, never puts the milk back in the fridge, never puts clothes in washing basket, leaves shoes in annoying places... I could go on

My DH and I always get a spare remote for TV or Virgin box, we sit on separate chairs or sofa, bit of a marriage saver 😀. Especially as he keeps cranking the volume up. Except when we both try to use at the same time and then it gets tricky.

@RockahulaRocks yes to the screwing up the tea towels and just leaving on a kitchen surface- infuriates me! What did their mothers teach them?!

Breathes..

Snores like a warthog and chunners away in his sleep.
Eats crisps REALLY LOUDLY.
Has to have some sort of noise on at all times.
Has a really shit memory.

If you'd have asked me this a year ago while I was still perimenopausal, I'd have been typing all night tbh. I wanted to put a pillow over his head. But that's worn off a bit now 😉

Given a sandwich he eats like a starving python. One day I will crack and brain him with thr plate!

Opens all the sliding doors downstairs so the house is wide open all day to get a ‘breeze’ in. It’s not the fucking Costa del Sol. It’s Britain and I’m freezing!
Leaves the butter out with the lid off so that all the flies ( that have come in from the doors he’s left often) can come in and feast on it.

This! I am forever saying to him to just slow down, it drives me absolutely mad.

He walks off in shops, airports etc without saying where he’s going or what he’s doing, makes me want to kill him.

Steals the cats... they follow her everywhere and will jump off my lap from deep sleep the second her foot even touches the floor.

My ex-partner used to irritate me by breathing 😁.

Leaves the tea towel screwed up on the worktop so it's always a bit damp 🤢

Never wipes up his crumbs

Tucks the duvet into the bottom of the bed, badly as well so it looks awful

All things that make me want to murder him!

Messy!

Omg, this! He wanders off in every shop, every mall, every fucking where. I have to call his mobile to find him again. It drives me insane!

The falling asleep really quickly while I lie there for half an hour.

Asking me what we should take out of the freezer for dinner a day before or the morning of that day. I don't know what I'll feel like. I know this is unreasonable of me.

Being happy and cheerful in the morning. These are all his worst qualities. I'm aware I don't exactly have the worst life lol 😂

I am the one in our house that falls asleep immediately. Like less than 2 minutes, and I'm dead to the world. I know I'm really lucky - but I do wake up ridiculously early as a punishment!

Falling down the shit film rabbit hole on Prime and taking half an hour to pick something truly attrocious.

Cannot ever put the bathroom hand towel on the rail. Just throws it anywhere. He is the allocated tidier and cleaner of the house as well and it's the one thing he doesn't do 😆 😂 🤣 he is an amazing housekeeper otherwise

Goes to the toilet and is in there for 45 minutes to an hour. (And before anyone starts no he's not watching porn, he leaves his phone in the living room).

In fairness this isn't just my partner - my dad, step-dad and brother are just as bad! Whyyyy do they take so long?!