TTC in a small 1 bed flat - would we be mad?

[MelonZebra]

DH and I currently live in a one bedroom rented flat. We're okay with renting, we live in the south east so no chance of getting a mortgage. I'm 34, he's 37 and we really want to start TTC soon but I'm really worried about the size of our flat. Our bedroom frustratingly has built in furniture so no chance of moving anything around. We could fit a next to me in there but not a cot. Our living room is a really decent size but because of the build in furniture in the bedroom we wouldn't be able to swap the rooms around.

DH thinks we should crack on with trying in a couple of months but I'm worried about what happens when any potential baby outgrows a next to me. We just renewed our contract so still have 12 months before we can move. We wanted to move to a 2 bed but every time something came on the market we couldn't ever view them as we work full time Monday to Friday and by the weekend they'd always gone. I suppose I can see his point that viewing 2 beds once we've had a baby may be easier as at least then I'd be off on maternity so could go view properties (thankfully parent in law's leave nearby and would love to have baby if I wanted to go view a property on my own).

Would we be mental to start TTC in a couple of months in our one bed with the view to trying to move to a 2 bed once I'm on maternity leave - hopefully before baby outgrows their next to me?

I’d go for it.

I wouldn’t wait.

Remember, this is Mumsnet,where everyone has more bedrooms than occupants! We started out renting... one bedroom flat, baby. No issue. (Bought caravan,long story, very small) Bought 2 bedroom house, girl and boy baby shared. Divided bedroom, even smaller, but frankly, they only slept in there.

I'd go for it.

You have 12 months on your tenancy, if you happen to get pregnant on your first try (!), you'll have around 3 months left on your tenancy before having to move. The baby will need to sleep in your room for the first 6 months anyway.

Sure, moving day will be fun with a few months old baby, but that's only temporary

I wouldn't wait either, but it's not clear what the baby is going to sleep in. The risk of a cot death is much high if you have a tiny baby sleeping in your bed.

OP said the baby will be in a next to me. Perfectly safe.

Baby won't have outgrown that in 3 months

Don't spread misinformation. Safe, intentional co-sleeping is not dangerous. Half the world does it and it is easy to research the ways to make it safer. The stats are misleading because all "co-sleeping", including that done by non-bf mothers and people falling asleep accidentally in a chair with their baby, is lumped together. Posts like yours create danger because exhausted mothers end up falling asleep in chairs or on sofas with babies instead of in a safe co-sleeping environment.

I would go for it in your shoes if you both definitely want a baby. If you’ve prospects of moving at some point then I’d go for it. We moved when first DD was a few months old, it worked out fine.

This! Go for it.

We were in a similar situation OP. 1bed flat and bedroom that couldn't fit a cot. We stayed there until he was about 6 months, and we then moved to a 2bed. Have to say it's more comfortable to have more space but we could definitely have stayed for a few more months, with cot in living room. Definitely the case that it's easier to look for places when on mat leave! I wouldn't wait, at 34 it's definitely not late (I was 34 too when became pregnant) but you never know how long it's going to take.

Will you be able to afford to rent a 2 bedroom apartment and pay nursery fees when the time comes? Any savings you have might be used up during maternity leave unless you have a good deal through your employer. If you can then I don't see why you should wait.

We have a 1 year old in a very small 1-bed. We own it and can't move without selling. It's tricky but we're happy, it's definitely do-able if that's the situation you find yourself in. For us when baby out grew the next to me he moved into the bed with me and partner now sleeps in the lounge. Not ideal but as I said, certainly do-able!

Sorry for the radio silence after posting. Thanks so much everyone. Not planning on co-sleeping (I'm aware that may change if/when any baby arrives) but currently planning on getting a next to me regardless of if we had a baby here or in a 2 bedroom. We can afford a 2 bedroom + nursery fees, we have looked into that just to make sure it's feasible and have decent occupational maternity pay so hopefully won't have to go through all our savings by the time I went back to work.

I suppose we should be able to get somewhere bigger within a few months of properly looking once any baby comes along but there's always that worry of what happens if we can't. Maybe I'm just overthinking it.

Go for it. If you are lucky enough to conceive immediately it's 15 months til you need a cot. My friends had a 1 bed and the cot was in a corner of their landing, a baby doesn't need a room really. When you have a toddler things change but that's another 18 months on.