How clean and tidy is your home.

[Shithole101]

If you have children. How tidy Is your home? What does tidy actually mean , in my head i always think people's homes are really tidy and visitor ready all the time. I see posts on Facebook and it will say please excuse the mess. When there is no mess.

Then there's tiktok videos with trashed houses that says let's normalise this. And they do a tidy up thicktok/video.

Handful of people on here may know I struggle with keeping on top of my house stuff and there's times it's Been trashed and shamefull. But im thinking it's not good to normalise that.

Some people manage to keep show room looking houses . How do people do that ?

I don't work but still struggle alot so how do people keep their houses really tidy but also work.

Washing is the bane of my life. Hate it.

I just want to say OP, that this doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. It’s just a particular area that you have difficulty with.

Mine is driving. I stopped driving on motorways after I had my first child. It’s taken me 6 years to work up the courage to drive on them.

We all have them. X

Yeah I know. But it has quite a big knock on effect. I will get there at some point . Maybe maybe not 🤣.

Ah that is quite a while it's good your getting there though. I really wish I could drive . I have no road sence though 😭

Cleanish. Tidyish. Some people would say it was clean and tidy, others wouldn’t.

It doesn’t come easily to me and I feel like I am constantly working at it and spend hours each day on it. I’ve always been amazed on here when people say the whole house is clean and sparkly and they can sit down and relax. I never get to that point. There will always be some dust somewhere, or crumbs in a corner, or a mark on the wall or mould on the silicone or a drawer in a mess…

You need a routine especially if it doesn't come naturally.
For the last 20 years, before work, the kitchen gets tidied and wiped down, the whole of the downstairs gets hoovered and the bathroom and downstairs loo gets cleaned. The washing is put in ready to go in the dryer when we get home.
I hoover upstairs at the weekend and do any bigger jobs to keep on top of things.
With this routine the house never gets on top of me, it's automatic now to do these things so it doesn't feel like a lot of effort.
Could you create a routine for yourself and write it down, eg laundry x3 days per week, bathroom x3 per week etc and ignore things until the specified day but then you must do* *them?

A routine definitely helps but I still find it gets on top of me.

When you say you clean the bathroom before work, what level of clean are you talking? Because every morning I will make sure the shower is squeegeed and any standing water wiped up, I clean the sink and the loo (seat/rim/bowl), I wipe over the mirrors. And usually do it all again in the evening after the kids have gone to bed. But at some point in the week (usually twice) I still need to find an hour to properly clean the shower and bath, to get the limescale off the taps and shower head, to scrub the tiles and grout, to clean the walls behind the sink and loo, to wipe the cabinet, mop the floor…and then you do that and then realise you can’t get the stubborn bits of limescale off the shower door rail (why are they so fiddly and difficult to access?!) and the towel rail has rust on and there’s dust behind it and the window tracks are filthy and the door frame has marks on. And that’s the bit I find difficult, is that despite doing all the daily and weekly bits that keep it ticking over and passable there is ALWAYS more to do.

So the tiles, tackling limescale etc would be a weekend job!
Through the week I do the same as you, so basic cleanliness of sink, loo, shower etc.
Same for the kitchen, clean all surfaces and floor daily but cleaning the oven/fridge would be done at the weekend.

Literally put same washing on for 5th time. You are not alone. I have very poor executive function… it feels like it is getting worse, especially as I consume a lot and can never remember where I put everything “in its home”

It’s exhausting.

Much better since I discovered The Organsied Mum Method! Basically, little and often every day. I have two young children who are at home so house gets messy with toys, food and clutter etc. I can’t relax until it is tidy! It’s not visitor ready all the time but a lot better now I’ve started this.

It makes no sense what so ever .sometimes I can drag wet washing upstairs and I suddenly get exhausted it just hits. So I then dump it and forget it . Then have to do it again. I'm not as bad when I can hang it outside. I think that's going to be my focus for the next few days or so.

I’m actually ok with laundry. What I do is sort a load out in the evening when I go for a shower. Then if it’s not a full load I go around banging on everyone’s doors asking for washing. It’s rare that it doesn’t get to a full load this way! Then it goes on first thing in the morning. Sometimes if I have a busy day I do get to the evening and realise I still haven’t hung it out though and then have to force myself to do it. It also backfires when everyone tells me they don’t have anything so I skip a day and then two days later they completely fill the basket with a fortnight’s worth of clothes 😡

Same here!

Can you do it if you give yourself a little “treat” after?

I always think “after I’ve done XYZ I’ll make myself a cup of coffee and have 20 minutes reading my book” for example. And it gives me the motivation to get everything done knowing afterwards I’ll get my reward and it’ll be doubled because all my jobs are done

No treating myself does not really do anything for me in that way. It's more of an energy level thing for me.

I'm.gonna get the kids to help me in a short while . I'm going to fold the washing and they can put away. Least that will be something.

I did clean snakes out as well yesterday as well. So that's something to.

Downstairs is tidy but could be cleaner.
Upstairs is very untidy, dh has some sort of issue around putting clothes and things away. And I work full time and also won't do it on principle. Therefore all his stuff is all over the place. It's does my head in tbh.

There are 6 things I do every day before I leave the house:

1: Kitchen - empty dishwasher and reload. Wipe benches.
2: A load of laundry on.
3: Vacuum at least one room. Often get more done.
4: Tidy the front entrance. This might include putting shoes away, taking recycling out, bags away.
5: Clean the toilet and basins.
6: Make beds.

This is exactly how I feel- I do clean and tidy every now and again but it makes no difference to my life so why bother - obviously things are kept fairly hygienic in the kitchen.
mess definitely doesn’t stress me out - I can relax quite happily while looking out at my pigsty of a lounge

Could you do a smaller or fast load of washing? Ti chip away at it? I do washing religiously. I have four kids and the one thing I do without fail daily. I could in theory wash non dirty stuff in 38 minutes. I fold it wet then hang it out. I take the hangers out to the line and hang it up from there. I iron nothing ever. I fold it off the line. The trick is folding and stretching it wet.

Could you just do say five tops and five trousers on fast wash and then you have won today's washing?

My house isn't pristine but it's not a complete tip either. E.g I have been embarrassed in the past if someone has dropped in unannounced as there could easily be toys all over the floor, kids shoes dumped in the hallway, plates on the sides in the kitchen. But only ever that day's mess as we tidy up every evening.

What has helped me is having a routine, especially around work etc. So there are set things done on set days, I have them on a list on my phone to remind me and I tick them off as I go. E.g.

Mondays - change all beds and wash towels
Tuesdays - mop and vacuum all the floors
Wednesdays - clean the kitchen
Thursdays - empty all the bins
Fridays - dusting
Saturdays - clean the bathrooms
Sundays - monthly job day (so rotate between cleaning windows, cleaning oven, fridge clearout, cleaning car etc.)

Then every day I do one load of laundry as it's not a massive task to wash, dry and put away if it's not left to pile up.

Pick up toys, tidy up kitchen etc after dinner and DDs have to help. They're not allowed the TV on after dinner until they've tidied up.

Quick wipe down of kitchen sides or bathroom sink or quick clean of toilet etc every evening if required.

My house is always clean and tidy.

I don't keep things I don't need, and I put things away when I've finished with them.

Why do you keep starting threads about this, though? Surely you've had plenty of advice on this subject already?

No i think it would make it worse to be honest. I would be doing more circles than I'm already doing . I don't hang things up. I don't even have a wardrobe. I don't iron or even sort colours so u do just chuck it in the machine. My shortest washes are 15 min 30 min I think I have a 45 . But I tend to use the hour one.

I try to keep mine nice and tidy as much as possible with two young children. I am also fortunate to work part time from home allowing me to keep on top of things after work.
As others have said I've got toy boxes where all toys go so they aren't down stairs cluttering up living room.
I tend to do a thorough clean through on a Sunday so that's bathroom bedrooms and downstairs kitchen etc.
I clean the windows weekly sometimes the living room window more due to little peoples hand prints.
Beds are made daily i can't stand seeing a bed not made up, bedsheets are stripped and cleaned once a week.

Downstairs floors I try to mop once a week sometimes every other week if they aren't dirty.

I vacuum twice a day downstairs due to crumbs and having a cat as well as I can't stand to see mess on the floor as well as walking on mess.
Upstairs gets vacuumed twice a week.

Worktops get a daily wipe down recently fortunate enough to have purchased a dishwasher so that's a godsend regarding the dishes I use to hate washing up three times a day as again I couldn't stand having dirty dishes and cups left laying around.

I know my house isn't perfectly clean and there's probably a lot I don't clean as often as I should but I feel happy and content that our family home is as clean and tidy for us.

I think your misunderstanding my thinking . I didn't ask what to do I didn't come on saying I'm in a bad place I can't cope , it feels hopeless etc. However I was reflecting and wondering how tidy other people's homes are in general what's considered normal etc.

But having said that there's a hell of alot of things I have to manage and cope with that I have going on in my life. That's extremely stressful. And when it gos on for a long time when you have no one to turn to it fucks you up mentally, emotionally and even physically.

This can then have an effect on other things that may not when seem realivent. Such as house work and other daily things because your so fucked up mentally/emotionally/physically. That its hard to find the energy. And all logic gos.

you've had plenty of advice on this subject already?

I 100% appreciate when people have given advice made suggestions. Given encouragement. General kind words etc. And absolutely that has helped so much . But when things feel hard again for reasons such as above things go to pot again. Things can't just be fixed just like that there's going to be ups and downs.

If I'm causing any upset then I apologise for that I really do. Just because I may post again it does not mean i have ignored any advice. It just means my head is not in that space right now. Also people can ignore me if they want to. I can't force anyone to read or reply.

Sorry for the long reply .

I too think you've been given all the advice humanly possible about cleaning your house and all the feedback available about how clean other people's houses are.
Why start the same posts repeatedly, look back at your old ones ( there's plenty) if it's encouragement you need. Or just crack on with it, you've learned that you need to do it, its not going to do itself.

How am I doing you any harm ? Why did you feel the Need to post . Why could you not just ignore me .