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Original poster

Recruiting etiquette

21 replies

Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 12:47

For context, I've made it to the final.round of an interview process, but they still have some "niggles" so they've asked for a 4th interview.

I think the recruiter has been part of the problem. How would the hiring manager/ CEO take it if I email him directly? (Just to mention that I know about it and that I'm more than happy to have this chat).

It's an external recruiter BTW, and I think he's the most likely to get annoyed. But as we know my relationship would be with.this company so I'm thinking that if they get annoyed maybe I definitely don't want to work there.

OP posts:
Arewenearlythereyet1 · 03/08/2024 12:52

What level of role is it that a 4th interview is required??? That seems very excessive and my concern would be that they will be very difficult to please. I'm not sure what your aim is in contacting them directly? If it's to show interest in the role the fact that you are willing to attend a 4th interview is proof of that I would have thought.

JC03745 · 03/08/2024 12:53

Are you taking the CEO role, because I can't think of any the needs a 4th interview either!

burnoutbabe · 03/08/2024 12:54

Isn't this just a continuation of an existing thread about a start up?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Employment advice General relationships Jobs
ByCupidStunt · 03/08/2024 12:54

I've never ever heart of a 4th interview.

All my life it's been 1, or sometimes 2.

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 12:56

burnoutbabe · 03/08/2024 12:54

Isn't this just a continuation of an existing thread about a start up?

It is yes, but it's a spin-off as this is about getting rid of the middle man in question.

OP posts:
Original poster
Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 12:57

ByCupidStunt · 03/08/2024 12:54

I've never ever heart of a 4th interview.

All my life it's been 1, or sometimes 2.

It's not unheard of... At Amazon I had 5 rounds. (One was with a panel).

OP posts:
JC03745 · 03/08/2024 13:11

To answer your question- I don't know. Is there anything in your contract with the recruiter that prevents this? What do you thing the recruiter has done to jeopardise you getting the role?

lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 03/08/2024 13:16

I am an external recruiter. It would help if you explained what the concerns of the company are and how you think the recruiter might have hindered it.

I have had this happen once or twice. There is nothing to stop you. Your recruiter will still get the fee anyway but what do you think the issue is with him? A decent recruiter won't get crossed wires or do anything to hinder a process that will benefit him! But he may be inexperienced or just rubbish

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 13:17

JC03745 · 03/08/2024 13:11

To answer your question- I don't know. Is there anything in your contract with the recruiter that prevents this? What do you thing the recruiter has done to jeopardise you getting the role?

I don't have a contract with him.

He's given me terrible coaching and advice. Plus the ways he phrases things haven't been the most helpful.

Thanks to his advice I was completely unprepared for one of the interviews and I misjudged how to answer in the third one.

OP posts:
Original poster
Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 13:19

lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 03/08/2024 13:16

I am an external recruiter. It would help if you explained what the concerns of the company are and how you think the recruiter might have hindered it.

I have had this happen once or twice. There is nothing to stop you. Your recruiter will still get the fee anyway but what do you think the issue is with him? A decent recruiter won't get crossed wires or do anything to hinder a process that will benefit him! But he may be inexperienced or just rubbish

He made me feel inadequate and he definitely didn't make me feel like I was good enough.

Maybe the company DOES think that, but a good coach will still make you feel empowered even when delivering negative feedback.

OP posts:
lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 03/08/2024 13:23

I think as with most things,it's fine to say things as long as it's sufficiently measured and professional. I wouldn't write anything that you wouldn't be happy with the recruiter seeing as it may get back to him.. nor be too negative about him (even if he isn't that good) as that will sound like you are blaming him for your answers. He does sound pretty crap but equally throwing him under the bud sounds unprofessional too. It's a tightrope!

So something like 'during my interview preparation I was left with / given the impression that you wanted to know about x or the question answered in y fashion.

However in / after my last interview I now realise that that wasn't the case and on reflection I could have answered it in X fashion

Difficult to advise without knowing the issue!

lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 03/08/2024 13:24

Just seen your update. Ok that's no good. Building confidence through interview preparation and constructive but positive feedback (which obviously they must be plenty to get to this stage) is a really important part of our job

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 13:50

lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 03/08/2024 13:23

I think as with most things,it's fine to say things as long as it's sufficiently measured and professional. I wouldn't write anything that you wouldn't be happy with the recruiter seeing as it may get back to him.. nor be too negative about him (even if he isn't that good) as that will sound like you are blaming him for your answers. He does sound pretty crap but equally throwing him under the bud sounds unprofessional too. It's a tightrope!

So something like 'during my interview preparation I was left with / given the impression that you wanted to know about x or the question answered in y fashion.

However in / after my last interview I now realise that that wasn't the case and on reflection I could have answered it in X fashion

Difficult to advise without knowing the issue!

Thanks for your reply!

My plan is not to though him under a bus, just simply opening a direct channel between us, while re-stating my desire to be part of their team. Maybe address the elephant in the room of the perceived inadequacies and reassure them and agreeing to the 4th interview. Maybe even ask about the topics to discuss.

I probably wouldn't even mention the recruiter tbh.

OP posts:
lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 03/08/2024 14:17

In that case then yes I think that's fine! Good luck! I hope you get the job if it's the one you really want!

I'd keep the email short and sweet. Good idea!

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 03/08/2024 14:21

Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 12:57

It's not unheard of... At Amazon I had 5 rounds. (One was with a panel).

Show quote history

Did you get the Amazon job?

Was it you who left my parcel on the doorstep when it was raining and didn't even bother to ring the doorbell? 😡

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 14:37

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 03/08/2024 14:21

Did you get the Amazon job?

Was it you who left my parcel on the doorstep when it was raining and didn't even bother to ring the doorbell? 😡

Show quote history

LOL those are all outsourced!

And yes I did get the job :) I felt like I graduated from Oxbridge at that point.

OP posts:
Original poster
Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 15:26

lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 03/08/2024 14:17

In that case then yes I think that's fine! Good luck! I hope you get the job if it's the one you really want!

I'd keep the email short and sweet. Good idea!

BTW thanks for the advice, I really appreciate it :)

OP posts:
JC03745 · 03/08/2024 18:58

I was completely unprepared for one of the interviews and I misjudged how to answer in the third one.

Do you mean recruiter set up an interview date that you couldnt prep for- like the next day? Surely its down to YOU how you answer the interview questions? I've never known a recruiter to coach me or provide much feedback about the role, and certainly never guided me on how to answer in the interview! Maybe you are in a completely different sector to me though.

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 03/08/2024 19:39

JC03745 · 03/08/2024 18:58

I was completely unprepared for one of the interviews and I misjudged how to answer in the third one.

Do you mean recruiter set up an interview date that you couldnt prep for- like the next day? Surely its down to YOU how you answer the interview questions? I've never known a recruiter to coach me or provide much feedback about the role, and certainly never guided me on how to answer in the interview! Maybe you are in a completely different sector to me though.

All the interviews were within consecutive days, so yes I couldn't prepare for as long as I would have liked.

All good recruiters that are ve met have definitely coached me.

He did tell me to prepare for X, and they never asked about it. Because I prepared so much for that topic, I didn't really think about other things to prepare.

For the third one, he advised to answer while wearing a very particular hat, but ultimately they still wanted me to answer from a different POV.

Given it's 4 roles in one, you do have to take one hat and wear the other one to answer properly.

OP posts:
Icanttakethisanymore · 03/08/2024 19:43

Of course it’s fine to contact them directly after 3 interviews.

JC03745 · 03/08/2024 20:05

he advised to answer while wearing a very particular hat
I nearly spat out my drink as completely misread that and thought the recruiter had advised you to wear a particular hat into the interview room! 🎩😂

You are doing well though OP if you've completed 3 interviews and they want you again. Unless there is a clause in the contract with your recruiter then yes, you could contact the company directly now.

I also worked on the other side as the interviewer. I was often shocked at how crap some recruiters were and the mis information they'd tell candidates. More than once I'd have someone turn up expecting to interview for job A, but we were interviewing for a completely different role. Sounds like your sector actually does provide some support/coaching, but this guys just isn't great. Best of luck and let us know how you get on.

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