If your son is probably going to be bald

[GauntJudy]

Have you prepared him for that fact at all?

All men are bald in my family. My brother started losing hair at 19, he's fine with it now but found it quite traumatic when so young. I remember him asking me to buy caffeine shampoo etc to try to help. He mentions now how baldness is one of the few traits that it's OK to name call about, despite it being completely out of the control of the person affected.

Anyway I can see that the best approach is to embrace your baldness, and lots of bald men look great - but wondering if I can help my son who is only 10 get towards that confidence.

I would not make a "thing" of it but casually and regularly refer to cool/ attractive/ inspirational people like celebs/ footballers who are bald so he grows up with positive associations.

That's a good point @greenleaveseverywhere he has lots of amazing role models via friends and family who are bald, I maybe need to talk more about others too.

I have three boys and male pattern baldness in my family and thinning /loss hair on my husbands. One of my boys at 27 has sadly got the male pattern baldness. But the other 2 of 26 and 17 have completely different hair - very thick and so far no signs.
One of my brothers had a hair transplant which has been really good.
there is no doubt it is incredibly tough. I think my son's loss was speeded up by poor diet and not looking after himself for a while. All you can do is boost their confidence as much as you can in other ways.
if his mental health takes a dip get him to refer himself into NHS talking therapies -which can help with acceptance and give ideas on ways to boost confidence and self esteem.
My son shaves his whole head now and wears cool hats. I think he may have a transplant at some point but refuses to discuss/let me pay for it.
As he has got older he has also seen peers with thinning hair- apparently by age 30 at least a third of men are balding.

I would leave it for now. As soon as my son was born I knew he carried the gene, by the way his hairline was.
Now in his mid 20s his hairline is receding at a rate of knots. He accepts it and gets on with life. I have said many times that male pattern baldness is not an illness and their are many worse things that could be passed genetically. So embrace and enjoy it.
It also helps that there are lots of very attractive bald men knocking around 😊😊

My eldest son started to go bald at 17/18. Thinning at his crown. I noticed but made no comment - was gutted for him. Luckily the fashion for close shaved heads came in and when lockdown hit and he couldn't visit the barber (he went every few weeks as his hair looked better shorter, hid the thinning somewhat), he took the decision to shave it all off. He's never looked back and now says he's so relieved as he doesn't have to try and hide it anymore - he genuinely looks good and he's got his confidence back.

It's interesting people's comments about being able to tell quite early sometimes. My husband's side has this but not my side of the family and one time he and our son went to a barber together, the barber commented along the lines of "well this one's not going to go bald". Our son was perhaps 10 at the time IIRC.

I would put some money aside so when he’s older if he wants he can have a hair transplant. They’re so good nowadays that if it is something that bothers him he’ll have a fund to sort it.

And yes lots of positive bald male influence.

My dad started to lose his at 16 and my maternal grandfather at 19. DH's side has luscious hair!

I did warn both my boys, they're late teens now and still hairy.....

My 18 year old worries about this. He has very thick, long hair at the moment. One of his great grandad's still had a full head of hair when he died in his early 80's so DS is hoping he will take after him. Dh is in his mid 40's with a tiny gap in his hair at the top that is barely more than a parting. His hair is a lot thinner in general compared to when I first knew him in his early 20's but if you were meeting him for the first time you wouldn't think he was losing his hair.

I've just looked online and the recommended age for transplant is 25 minimum but probably over 30 best. Depends on the progression of the hair loss as you want to see the pattern otherwise risk patches of transplant and patches of ongoing baldness.

While looking at that I read about no surgical routes including Minoxidil which can be bought from amazon so I guess that could be tried if there were signs of thinning.

I do empathise with young men that go through this, it's bad enough being a woman in your 40s and facing clear signs of ageing, let alone being in your prime and having people shout rude comments about hair loss.

You are hugely overthinking this OP. Rather than looking at baldness cures, encourage him not to be concerned with physical appearance. As we should be doing as parents anyway.

My DS16 is worried about this as his dad and grandads on both sides are bald. He is also very fair. I think his biggest fear is the shape of his head being exposed as it’s quite flat on one side from birth. His hairdresser set his fears slightly to rest mentioning hair transplants are very normal amongst young men now but I know it bothers him. I feel for him.

Is it true it goes down the mother’s line? If so then my boys will be fine.

DH is very thin on top so buzzes it all off. So my kids see their dad living a fun full life unaffected by baldness. So again, hopefully they’ll be fine.

I think Prince William is a great role model for baldness. He could easily have had a transplant but chose to be happy with himself and he looks good as he is.

Hmm I get your point but as someone who has had their own self esteem badly affected by a facial birthmark I'm not against resolving physical hangups with treatment. It'd be great if we could just embrace ourselves and be happy, but I've tried for nearly 5 decades and can tell you sometimes the "quick fix" is the best path!

That said I'll absolutely aim to instill confidence but would also support treatment if that's his preference.

I knew from early on my middle son was going to lose his hair at a young age and sadly he has. We've only had brief conversations about it but he seems fine with it and has just accepted it as one of those things. I do feel sad for him.

I agree with @CelesteCunningham , it is completely normal and very commonplace so no need to assume he will or should want to go down the hair transplant route

I mean if you suspected your daughter had inherited a flat chest from you, would you be saving up so she can have a boob job?

Surely far better to teach your DC that there is more to life than your appearance and it's better to make the most of what you do have rather focus on what you don't have

I had a boyfriend in my 20s who had a shaved head and looked great. Turned out he had started to lose his hair at 21. He was really glad he had grown it long and done some daft hair dye while he could. I think the big thing is to accept it is happening and go very short or even shave entirely bald. Then it looks like choice and a style and he will feel more confident.

My son started balding at 19, and to my knowledge never cared. It just wasn't a thing to worry about. His girlfriend at the time, whose dad happened to be bald, took it in stride. He's now in his 30s and settled with another great woman.

There is absolutely no need to "prepare" your son for baldness. Such a response only makes baldness into a bad thing, which it is not.

Also, my son has plenty of money and could pay for transplants, but doesn't see the need.

Wigs and transplants are for inadequate men.

If your daughter is probably going to be fat. Genetics.

Do you think the same about women who have extensions?