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Original poster

Engagement ring comment

27 replies

muffledvoice · 24/07/2024 20:30

I myself am getting married soon, it's been on our agenda for a while now and a friend of mine asked why I don't have an engagement ring on. To their dismail I told them we wasn't doing it traditionally and I've already bought my actual wedding ring for them to tell me that's disgusting that my partner has not even bought me a ring

Thoughts?

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 24/07/2024 20:33

If you’re happy that’s all that matters. What’s it to them? Have they other objections to your partner?

BFG2023 · 24/07/2024 20:33

They're being a dick.
And huge congratulations! Flowers

Strawberrycheesecake7 · 24/07/2024 20:34

You obviously don’t need to have an engagement ring if you don’t want to. My dad never gave my mum one and they’ve been married nearly 30 years. There’s no rule that says you have to get married in exactly the same way as everyone else. Your friend is being ridiculous just ignore them.

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Shinyandnew1 · 24/07/2024 20:35

Do what you like-why does it matter what anyone else thinks?

BigFatLiar · 24/07/2024 20:35

Entirely up to the two of you. I do wear rings and when we got engaged we went to argos and bought my engagement ring for about £50. Spending lots on a ring when you may be needing to save for other expenses seems a waste.

If you don't want an engagement ring it's nobodies business but yours and your partner.

StiggyZardust · 24/07/2024 20:36

Today is my 25th wedding anniversary. I don't have an engagement ring! It really doesn't matter 😁

3peassuit · 24/07/2024 20:38

You should have used the Mumsnet response “did you mean to be so rude?”

AtomHeartMotherOfGod · 24/07/2024 20:40

You've got to wear it - who cares? I can't remember who chose our rings... think we did it together? But I definitely orchestrated my engagement ring 😂 I love it and still get comments about it from strangers 15 years on!

Edingril · 24/07/2024 20:42

I don't have one as I never wanted one, just because someone says something doesn't make it true

RampantIvy · 24/07/2024 20:44

I'm not a ring person. They don't excite me. So, when DH asked me to marry him I said "yes, but I don't want an engagement ring, I want a new cooker".

We got a cooker as a wedding present from one set of parents in the end.

We have been married for 43 years and the only ring I own is a plain gold wedding band that cost £30.

LadyCrumpet · 24/07/2024 20:51

BigFatLiar · 24/07/2024 20:35

Entirely up to the two of you. I do wear rings and when we got engaged we went to argos and bought my engagement ring for about £50. Spending lots on a ring when you may be needing to save for other expenses seems a waste.

If you don't want an engagement ring it's nobodies business but yours and your partner.

Same here, except we paid for it mostly with nectar points 😂 cz and white gold.

Bonbon21 · 24/07/2024 20:56

You dont even need to get a wedding ring if you dont want one!
Your friends (?) are being nasty... you do what you (two) want to do!

bananamum13 · 24/07/2024 21:02

They are being a dick and projecting, if you and H2B are happy, that's all that matters

Alpolonia · 24/07/2024 21:04

I don’t have one. Didn’t want one, I never considered us engaged, we just decided to get married (within 2 months!).

Sapphire387 · 24/07/2024 21:14

I didn't have an engagement ring. I find them old-fashioned. Your marriage, your choice. Your friend is rude.

OhshutupRoger · 24/07/2024 21:14

I have a £5 silver wedding band and I could not care less!

thursdaymurderclub · 24/07/2024 21:18

i no longer wear my actual engagement ring... and after weight loss i ended up buying a new engagement ring and wedding ring as the originals were not able to be adjusted due to the style.

its a ring.. to me its purely a token to the world that i am a married woman, but i don't need it to prove anything. when DH and i got married, the wedding wasn't important, we simply wanted to be married. we love being husband and wife.. all we really needed was that bit of paper that showed we were legally married.

on the same token... my husband has never ever taken is wedding ring off since the day we put it there!

FairviewRosie24 · 24/07/2024 21:47

I have an engagement ring but only wear it when poshed up (about twice In 22 years). Have a cheap Argos plain band which I never take off. OH lost hIs 3 days after wedding lol

Slushynana · 24/07/2024 22:01

I have been married 50 years and don’t have an engagement ring, I just have a plain gold wedding band and am very happy with that.

Leanmeansmitingmachine · 25/07/2024 06:52

“Disgusting”? Christ.

Boopbeepbeepboop · 25/07/2024 06:55

Why do you care what they think?

pizzaHeart · 25/07/2024 07:02

Thoughts about engagement rings: it’s up to you entirely. I don’t have one and married more than 25 years.
Thoughts about your friend and her comment: she was very rude. Could be that she’s jealous? I would reconsider friendship with her asap.

Changingplace · 25/07/2024 07:28

Your friend is ridiculous! Being engaged just means you’ve decided to get married, you don’t have to wear a ring, it doesn’t mean you’re any less engaged.

I rarely wear my wedding ring, doesn’t mean I’m not married.

DustyLee123 · 25/07/2024 07:29

I never wear my engagement ring, and my adult kids couldn’t tell you what it looks like.

Copperoliverbear · 25/07/2024 07:30

Not everyone wants to do things the traditional way, ignore her, if you and your partner are happy that's all that matters x