Hey, not sure what my thread is about. Just feeling abit blue and out of sorts, bit if context in no particular order (or maybe it is!)
-recently turned 40
-not connecting with hubby intimately, resent him/dislike him as a person I think
-handed in my job to temp as was bored and seemed to be going no where
- no close regular friends, have mums I can go out with but tbh don't really gave anything in common
-don't excecise
-have trouble keeping on top of cooking and what to cook
-have 2 lovely boys, make me laugh and are my friends really, one is going to secondary
-20 years since my mum passed away anniversary recently, mum was 41, I was 20
- worried about my dad, recently moved and left our childhood home as he is depressed I think
- hubby is pre diabetic has high BP but he continues to drink
-he spends money like its water, I'm very frugal
-hubby isn't really there to support me in helping with boys as he is in the office alot
-hubby got us into alot of debt (nearly £100k) about 6 years ago, I found out when we had to remortgage as I looked through paper work, he had taken credit cards out in my name, that's why I dislike him I think, I've never forgiven him. I realised his capacity to lie to me m, was debt due to trading which is really just gambling
-debt is fine now, sorted pretty quickly as my job earns well, I blame him for us not having more children, I would have but realised I can't really on him so I focused on earning and squirrelling away money incase he gets us in trouble again
Not sure where to go or what to do, feel bored, want to do new different things, feel excited about things kids growing up, don't want to be bored and lonely, any insights, advice welcome, thanks x