Back to work after maternity leave tomorrow

[Bayleaftree63]

Just that really. I’m going back full time. I feel sad, jealous of anyone who works part time / SAHP, guilty for leaving my baby and generally gutted my maternity leave is over.

Before anyone comes at me it’s not a competition, I just wanted some nice words of encouragement.

Long and short of it is, we need the money!

The thought is way worse that it actually is I promise. I was the same.

Aw it's so hard OP but it will get easier. I'm 3 months in now and dcs & I have settled into routine. You will miss them, call the childminder/nursery if you need reassurance. They won't mind. No doubt baby will have great fun and is in good hands.

It’s always going to be a bit of an adjustment - but honestly, there are some benefits!

It’s a break from childcare. You can do stuff on your own. The money is obviously nice.

Do you have any flexibility in your work at all? I’ve found being able to WFH some days helps to regain some time with them.

Promise you'll feel exhausted, but it's a different kind of exhaustion, and you'll be proud of yourself for getting through the first day.

It's great having something truly for you. Enjoy it, it's a break from baby and the house.

I've just gone back, and I'm loving it. Second time around for me though, and it was harder this time around but as pp said the idea is worse than the reality. Just think, you'll be able to have a hot drink while it's still hot!

By lunchtime it will like you’ve never been away!

It's a big adjustment, but it's honestly fine in the long run. Don't put too much pressure on yourself, good enough is sufficient in all areas of your life for the next 6 months, you don't need to be super mum and super employee. It does get easier as time goes on and I actually really like the split of time home vs work doing 5 days a week.

Bear in mind flexible working and don't be scared to ask/push for it. Any decent company should be supportive of you (within reason) if you're a good employee. Eg I arranged to work slightly shorter days and do a few hours flexibly at home in the evening over the week - this allows me to have a bit of time with her each day late afternoon/early evening. I also negotiated to WFH 1 day a week to give me some time to get chores done instead of commuting.

Aww I hope it all goes well for you. I dreaded going back and handing over my baby, I had a bit of a wobble after a few months about missing out on stuff but now, I feel like I’m a better parent for having that time away (as bad as it sounds). Work is my break and time to talk to adults about general chit chat and then in the evening I can be fun mum at bath time and at the weekends too.

Plus, I can't lie, the break from hearing 'mummy' every minute of the day is really appreciated!!

Good luck OP! Truly the thought of it is horrible and the first couple weeks are hard but having that break means you get some truly wonderful reunions. I feel lucky I get the chance to miss my kids sometimes. Not everyone gets that chance.

Ah hugs.

It's shit. But the thought it's often worse than the event.

Something my sister did for me when returning after my first mat leave she made me an oh shit kit. Basically all the bollocks that I would need in hectic mum life in a bag I could leave in my locker. It was really cute. It had little notes on it. Things like
When you've ran late and not had breakfast...a porridge ready pot
When you've not had time to wash your hair...little bottle of dry shampoo
When life's crap timing gets in the way...period stuff
When you need a pick me up....coffee latte sachets
When things are a bit hectic....rescue remedy
When things get emotional...tissues and make up wipe and mascara
When things get a bit stressful...deodorant
When the bugs are taking everyone down....berroca and paracetamol.
When god knows what is happening.... a pack of new pants!
When you need a reminder of why you're doing it...pics of the kids

It was really lovely. My point being if you get chance get a oh shit kit together.

My other tip keep emergency snacks for child in car. We use oaty bars and a little juice drink. Always helpful on emergency pick ups.

On pick ups give snack on way home too.

Good luck!

It's difficult to go from being with your baby all the time to not. You do get used to it quickly though. Then once your cute tiny not mobile baby goes mobile and becomes a cyclone of destruction, it is nice to know no one is trashing your house while you are at work. Good luck

This….it will be Ok OP

Have been back 4 weeks. The thought is 100% worse than the actuality. Promise.

Thank you everyone. Reading all your comments has lifted my spirits.

Good luck to anyone in a similar situation xx

I felt the same, but it very quickly became the new normal and you will all adjust to the new routine. After a while it even became quite a nice break from parenting, dare I say it! Good luck

Reading through the hints & tips as due back v soon too

All the best OP! Best piece of advice I've been given so far is treat it like a new job even if you've been working for them for years. 💖

I've been back four months and all the babies I know the same age (all started nursery around one) are flourishing now and enjoying themselves. They will cry and you'll feel awful but they will be cuddled and they'll get used to it x

You’re going to do great! Use your skills, have some adult conversation and stimulation, set your kid the best example and show him that women can and will bring the bacon home just as men can.

Good luck @Bayleaftree63
I hope it goes well.