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9 year old son is so hyperactive

9 replies

Blattasplat · 11/07/2024 18:49

My 9 year old son is so unbelievably hyperactive that it's making me dislike him. He is an absolutely lovely boy with a big heart, is very kind, funny and sweet, extremely bright and witty and just lovely which is why I'm struggling so much with these mixed emotions.

He started walking at 9 months old and ever since then has been hugely active. He started talking very early on, and had always been very chatty. He plays sport and spends a lot of time outside, at parks etc. We facilitate lots of opportunities for physical activity but it never seems to be enough to channel his energy.

At He is constantly jumping around, jumping off furniture, finding things to bounce or throw and as a result is constantly banging his head, hurting his legs, elbowing other people, knocking stuff over.

When he is not expressing his energy physically, he expresses it by making noises, banging things, clapping his hands, tapping his feet, making fart noises with his mouth, shouting out random sayings, and just generally making frequent, sudden movements and/or noises all day long. Add in injuries and broken objects, and it's very stressful.

Both DH and I are very chilled, calm people and the atmosphere in our home is not chaotic. We have another child who is lively but we don't feel like we are having a very frequent stress response towards them. Everything feels noisy, unpredictable and loud and both DH and I are getting increasingly annoyed and are trying to manage our response to this in a way which doesn't impact on our son's self esteem.

We love our son immensely and try to spend lots of one on one positive, quality time with him. He is great company actually and is very popular at school. His teachers think he is a bit impulsive and can be silly, but nothing out of the ordinary. His school reports are excellent, and he applies himself to his work very well. He is very happy and confident with lots of friends, and he knows how much we love him. I do everything I can to maximise positive interactions and I really don't think he is seeking attention, as he gets a lot already.

I am just struggling to deal with the overwhelming response to his immensely distracting, frequent outbursts. Sometimes I feel so triggered that I feel on the brink of tears. I feel awful typing this as he really is such a lovely young man who we adore, but the constant, constant bang, bang, bang of him moving, jumping, shouting, clapping, stomping from morning until night drives us mad. Help.

OP posts:
Whu · 11/07/2024 18:57

He sounds a lovely boy and I’m sorry that something he is clearly unable to control is making you dislike him. Please keep building him up so he doesn’t feel a life time of shame for how he is.
Why don’t you go to the doctors and ask for an ADHD assessment?
Also follow strategies for ADHD children.
lots of children with ADHD are bright and also ‘mask’ some symptoms at school. You think he’s noticeably hyperactive and school have said he’s impulsive so there is something to have looked into before the demands of puberty and high school.

Devilsmommy · 11/07/2024 18:58

Has he been tested for ADHD or tourettes?

Janedoe82 · 11/07/2024 18:58

Adhd??

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Cozylozy · 11/07/2024 18:59

I think OP that it wouldn’t do any harm to have him assessed you could be getting all the behaviours because he is masking at school

GrazingSheep · 11/07/2024 18:59

Dyspraxia?

Blattasplat · 11/07/2024 19:07

Whu · 11/07/2024 18:57

He sounds a lovely boy and I’m sorry that something he is clearly unable to control is making you dislike him. Please keep building him up so he doesn’t feel a life time of shame for how he is.
Why don’t you go to the doctors and ask for an ADHD assessment?
Also follow strategies for ADHD children.
lots of children with ADHD are bright and also ‘mask’ some symptoms at school. You think he’s noticeably hyperactive and school have said he’s impulsive so there is something to have looked into before the demands of puberty and high school.

We are doing our very best to make sure he doesn't feel these very things but there is a risk he will pick something up. We honestly do love him so much and think so highly of him.

I said to my husband that I think we need to investigate his further and he is starting to agree.

OP posts:
Blattasplat · 11/07/2024 19:08

No he hasn't been tested for anything yet

OP posts:
Covidwoes · 11/07/2024 19:33

OP he sounds like children I teach who have ADHD. I'd definitely arrange to have him privately tested. On the NHS you'll be waiting years unfortunately.

Janedoe82 · 11/07/2024 21:06

Yes if you can get a private assessment. Much quicker. Then you can look at medication if you want to go down that route.

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