Never a thank you

[NoUpcomingDramas]

I know this is going to sound so petty but here we go.

We have meetings twice a week and generally at the end of the meetings, we can shout out to a team member saying thanks for something they have done or helped with. We are very busy right now and we are all working our backsides off. I'm leading two parts of the job that used to be for two different people plus other stuff. Literally today, everyone got a shout out or something nice said about them, except me.

It's not the first time but it has, for me, become so noticeable. There's one guy who everyone knows is underperforming and messing things up on the daily, yet he often gets thanked in every meeting.

It's ridiculous as I'm a grown up but I don't know how to get over it. Any suggestions?

You are not being unreasonable, it does sound a bit divisive. The whole idea of “thank you shout outs” sounds like a primary school achievers assembly.

Exactly that, it feels like when I ask my kid who got "pupil of the week" and it's always the little shit bags, cos they've sat still for five minutes.

This kind of absolute bollocks is part of why I’m self employed.

Thats really shit for you @NoUpcomingDramas I bet you do a fab job and make it look easy so nobody ever notices. Sod that!

I hate this kind of management crap too. I had to work in a department where we had a “thank you”/ gratitude tree one year, where people hung little cards with messages on. And then a “graffiti appreciated wall”. Then they came up with an app where you could earn points when people around the global business thanked you, and at a certain level the points became a £20 gift card.

No one ever thanks the people who just get on with the routine work.

I was asked at close of business yesterday to do a presentation today at 9am. Not one mention or shiny shit given. When I asked about it I was interrupted by someone else.

I've just read a really sad thread and then checked the BBC news which is constantly sad and feel so bloody ridiculous now that I'm whining over such trivia.

It's making me paranoid. Like am I missing something?!

My partner said that those who shout the loudest get the recognition but I don't work with wankers in general. It's a nice team.

A meeting last week we had to go round the screen and present something as part of an activity. I was missed off and that's not the first time. I don't think it's deliberate but I just don't know.

My partner says to raise it with my line manager but it feels so petty.

Go to work
Do job
Get paid
Come home

Forget about it

Bring it up in annual review

Or make a fuss next meeting in a light hearted way

Many years ago I worked in a small company. There were 2 young women who had the same role. Contract hours finished at 5 and one would log off around 4.58 and exactly at 5 she would stand up say goodbye and leave. The other was like the heart and soul of the company, always first there, would stay on most days if someone else was working late to support them, made tea for whoever, organised birthday cards and cakes etc. An absolute angel. We had a big crisis one time and the manager asked everyone to stay late for a couple of days, he personally asked the first woman. It was just presumed the second would be a team player. And guess who got a big thank you at the end of the week? 20 yrs later and I sometimes think of this as a cautionary tale.

You need to go all Snoop Dogg and be like
I wanna thank me...

I actually considered thanking myself!

Should I speak up? Dunno how I'd word it without sounding like a tool.

So I said something..... Not sure how that'll land. My dad said I was being a snowflake!

What did you say and how was it received?

Make sure your colleagues are aware of exactly what you’re doing in your role. If you’re missed out for something, draw attention to this and make sure you get to do whatever you’ve prepped. Other people will take you at your own estimation.

That doesn’t sound nice. Could it be that they are so used to you over performing that they don’t think you need that extra motivation to keep it up?
I think you are looking for recognition in the wrong place. If you are doing the job of two people and working in the evening to deliver a presentation at 9am… it sounds like you need a raise and a promotion. Don’t let them take advantage of you.

You're not going to share what you said or how it went?

Start saying no to things. Be a bit awkward. Then if you do take on a last minute presentation they will remember to appreciate you.

It's infuriating. Management needs to put a stop to this because it's counter productive. Id have been pissed off with this also as I work really hard too.

I just told my line manager it felt harsh never being thanked when the guy, who we all know is shit, gets thanked for logging on. Or words to that effect. She got it.

Pleased it went well!!!
Next step is to stop the whole “thank you” juvenile performance for everyone!