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Would you think she’s not bothered about staying in touch

9 replies

Cancelledagainandagain · 07/07/2024 18:07

My brother was married to his wife for over thirty years. I was a teenager when they got together and she’s been present all my adult life. We always got on well. They unexpectedly got divorced two years ago. I stayed in touch with my sister in law but they lived at the other end of the country so have only seen her once since they split.

I’ve tried to arrange to see her twice whilst we’ve been in her area and she’s cancelled both times at the last minute. The first time she said she was going to see her friend so cancelled me and the second time she said it was too early in the day for a visit so cancelled.

Am I right in thinking she’s not interested in keeping in contact from now on. I don’t want to keep embarrassing myself by suggesting we get together when she doesn’t seem interested. I know it might be that she doesn’t feel we have a connection any more. What would you think if you were me.

OP posts:
cupcaske123 · 07/07/2024 18:08

I'd leave it OP. Let her contact you and arrange something. It must be very disappointing.

Leeds2 · 07/07/2024 18:15

Maybe send birthday and Christmas cards, but leave it to her to initiate a meet up.

Comedycook · 07/07/2024 18:17

Yeah I think you're probably right. I'd leave it unless she initiates a meet up. Has she met someone else perhaps and feels awkward?

bananaboats · 07/07/2024 23:50

Yes I think you have to take a step back and leave her to it.

Runnerinthenight · 08/07/2024 00:44

She doesn't seem to want to keep in touch so just let her go.

You've been so lovely to try to stay close to her.

Berlinlover · 08/07/2024 00:49

You sound lovely but I’d leave it to her to initiate the next meet-up. If it happens it happens but be prepared for the possibility she doesn’t want to stay in touch.

strawberryteacake · 08/07/2024 01:16

I would think you are a reminder of a particularly painful time.

Commonsenseisnotsocommon · 08/07/2024 02:57

My money is on her feeling she wants to leave the past behind and doesn't need a reminder of her previous life which may be painful to think about. Nothing wrong with dropping her a 'if you'd ever like to meet up I'd love to so just drop me a line and we can arrange' note but then leave her be after that if no response. You'll never truly know what went on behind closed doors and you may not want to so might not be a bad thing to leave the past where it is.

Aquamarine1029 · 08/07/2024 03:44

I'm thinking seeing you is just too much for her, and it would make it very hard for her to move on. I would leave her alone.

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