Please help, can't cope

[Loapal]

I'm 35 weeks pregnant with my second. My first was a long labour followed by emergency c section and I was so ready for him to be out by then I didn't really think about dying. This time round I'm having an elective and now I'm a few weeks away from that reality I keep thinking I will die. I have health anxiety anyway and struggle to rationalise. My heart rate has consistently been high throughout pregnancy and I'm worried it will just give out on the operating table. I've also just heard of amniotic fluid embolism and am TERRIFIED of this happening to me. I have risk factors for a high risk birth including being 35, being overweight, gestational diabetes and thrombophilia.

I can't sleep and am constantly crying in fear. I've been referred to the mental health team but not heard anything yet. Stuff like hypnobirthing really doesn't work for me.

Is there anything that would make you feel more reassured?

My elective CS was fab. Can't complain about anything. I was nervous as hell going in, I think that's entirely natural, but it was a good experience, way better than my first birth which wasn't fun.

I know how easy it is to look at some freak occurrence and be convinced that will happen to you. But high probability is you will be one of the "boring" majority that have a "boring" absolutely fine experience and you will meet your little one. As you say - hard to rationalise.

I appreciated knowing when I would have my baby and that I'd be in a planned situation with medical care all around me.
I was 36 and didn't even know that was a risk factor - in fact I can't think why it would be. I can't speak to your other conditions I'm afraid but please do talk to someone about it.

Stats. IE someone telling me I'm more likely to be killed by a washing machine than in childbirth or something 😅

Hopeful bump.

Given that you don’t have any clinical illnesses, you’re actually safer in an operating theatre than most other places. As well as the surgeon who’ll deliver your baby, you’ll have an anaesthetist who will have their total attention on your heartbeat, blood pressure, breathing rate etc all the time. Plus other midwives, nurses. And a separate team to take care of your baby once it’s born.

If you need it, they can lower your heartbeat, do whatever’s needed to keep you safe. And they will reassure you every step of the way.

You’re in safe hands and I’m sure all will be well.

My section is booked for next week and I'm absolutely shitting myself.

Hi op hoping all went well. I'm 43 and TTC, I lost two babies in 2022 and have put off TTC again due to health anxiety and irrational fears. My losses were complicated requiring surgical procedures, one I bled more than expected and it's led to all kinds of fears. I also bled after delivery of my daughter 10 years ago, I don't believe it was managed well and although I didn't need a transfusion I did end up on iron tablets after someone checked me 3 days after delivery. I'm just consumed with fear. I hope everything went smoothly for you and and you are enjoying your new baby xx

So sorry you are feeling so anxious. Please talk to your midwife. Good luck xx

Hope all went well OP x