Giving up on a passion? Anyone ever done this?

[HoneysuckleYears]

Not life or death by all means, but pretty important to me. I was an arts post grad, specialising in art photography and 3d, collage. Although I learned the basics of painting it never really interested me.
Fast forward to now, 25 yrs later, I have been trying to paint for the past 7 years!
And it won't happen, at all.

You know when something feels natural and you love doing it? It comes with a sort of ease and joy? Not this. I tried all the usual approaches - dedication, practice, experiment, play, everything.
Now, when I enter my 'studio' room, my heart sinks. My mind loves the idea but my actual real life self seems not to. Only recently I was going through my old work, my photo portfolio, my printmaking, digital art...and recalled how much pleasure they all gave me. I have no idea why i have forced myself to paint for this much time when it doesn't make me happy.

I do earn a moderate living from my creative work, and teach part time. I had this fantasy that I could segue into painting on canvas or make watercolours in the future, but after 7 years you'd just 'know' right?

Has anyone else ever had a passion that they had to kick to the kerb? I can't get my head around how many years I keep trying this, yet it never works out. I actually feel psychologically healthier when I am not trying to do it!

Same, really. I have a Fine Art degree and specialised in painting. I was very motivated, got a first, sold work for many years.

One year I was busy with other things, thought I would take a break. That 'break' has stretched to about 8 years now. I do about 1 painting a year. I don't find it relaxing, I find it frustrating hard work. I've decided I'm just not naturally talented at it, every painting is a lot of trial and error, it's like I force it. The end results are generally good but I take a very convoluted way to get there. Like you, psychologically I feel better NOT doing it. And yet I can't completely bring myself to give it up.

What I have done is start doing something else creative, which is writing. That comes a lot easier to me and I actually enjoy it more.

What do others say about your work OP? Are you painting primarily to sell your work?

Perhaps it just isn’t quite the right fit for you and it’s time to try something new?

A passion doesn’t have to last forever if you no longer get any joy from it. On the other hand, could your expectations be too high, are you a perfectionist? I find this mindset can really suck all the joy and fun out of a hobby or passion as we are too hard on ourselves over every little error.

Yes, writing. I always wrote, eventually published a book, and now have no desire to keep going.

Are you doing it as a hobby or money? If the former 7 years seems a very long time to spend on something that you think / feel this way about. If the latter, would consider whether the money is OK for the time, in comparison with your other options. Seems likely your time could be better spent elsewhere.

It is such a weird thing isn't it? How something just goes away or we realise it wasn't much joy for us at all..

I have been making a part time living since my 20's selling and designing art prints, which are digital or photographic. That comes quite easily to me and I love doing it.
I thought persisting with the painting was more of an 'authentic' progression which was a very silly way for me to think. It does feel intensely frustrating and I am only semi satisfied at the end.