Cold callers...

[DilemmaDelilah]

I have discovered a fantastic way to get rid of cold callers on the phone. I tried it out this morning and it worked a treat! I answered the phone with our surnames, e.g. Smith and Jones, how can I help you? I got a very apologetic person saying they had the wrong number and ending the call.
I am prepared to take it further if I get someone obstreperous on the other end... I thought perhaps if they insisted on asking for Mrs Smith I would ask them for the nature of their call, and then if they continued I would ask for their details so that we could bill them for her time and offer to check her diary. How much do solicitors charge for their time nowadays? I did some work experience for a firm of accountants some time ago and I think they charged in 15 minute increments.

I just don't pick up to begin with, do a number look up and then block. Don't have a home phone and nobody I know has one either.

I usually answer with “fraud office, can I help you please”. Never failed so far.

Why would you give out your surnames.

That is confirmation that that number is linked to that surname which they will correlate with other info they have or record it to build up a picture.

When they call, don't give them anything. Block them. Don't give them any information they might be able to use to profile you.

You don't HAVE to use your own names! And it's my landline so not possible to block. My mobile identifies most spam calls so I just ignore those.

I try and keep them talking for as long as possible without giving out any information - I treat it as a challenge. (I figure it stops them phoning someone else for a while!) There was one memorable one who was trying to get information from me and I kept turning his questions into questions back to him. He ended up shouting at me that I was being rude! I stayed polite and pointed out he rang me and should know the information he was trying to find out and which point the phone was slammed down! I haven’t had any spam calls for a while - maybe I’m now on a blacklist as a time waster!

Ha! Reminds me of my dad who used to answer the phone with "War Office, are you looking for a fight?"

If it's a slow work day and I get a scam call I like to play with them like a cat does with a half dead mouse. I figure if I can keep them on the phone long enough that's less people they can potentially genuinely scam. So I'll talk slowly, ask them to repeat things, keep them on hold, apologise profusely etc then when I've had enough come out with some Hindi expletives.

Kitboga, the American YouTuber is the master. He keeps them on the line literally for hours.

I figure if I can keep them on the phone long enough that's less people they can potentially genuinely scam

YOu do realise a lot of these cold callers are in vast call centres, don't you? and that there will be hundreds of them making these calls? and that by talking to them you've shown you'll engage so you've gone on a sucker list for other cold callers and scammers to use?

My trick for phone companies trying to get me to switch plans, is I tell them they’ve called me on a work phone and I have no control over what Sin card is used.. oh and take me off your calling list. That ends it pronto.

Yes I do realise that. Seen enough Jim Browning videos to know what goes on in these call centres in Calcutta.

I've heard about the so called suckers list but I get one call a month, tops, so I reckon that theory is bollocks. My late nan on the other hand used to donate to one national charity. Fuck me off the back of this she used to get calls from all kinds of charities - and their begging letters (always from PO boxes in Crawley for some reason). Utterly shameless, I used to have a terrible job convincing her to ignore them all.

Had one the other day life insurance scam.

Put the number into Google, very interesting.

I’ve got a few tricks for different ones. When they call telling me I’ve been in an accident I play dumb and pretend I’ve got amnesia, they soon put the phone down

It depends on the mood I am in ,
Most of the time I answer with 'hello fake name, fake company name , please can I have your name and account number so I can assist you.
I am polite and business like , it stops most dead in there tracks.

Or I will say ' I am not the bill payer' that shuts up 90% of the sales pitch.

For the rest I just tell them to leave me alone and remove my number from their list (I dont believe for one minute that they will do )

I am always polite , I know it's a pain when we get them calls but I doubt anyone wants to do that job but needs must sometimes.

Whenever anyone called our landline (we don't even know the number and have never given it out, 100% scammers who called it) my husband always answered "taliban HQ" for funsies.

I can't remember the last time I had one on either landline or mobile but we get a lot at work, although most are cold callers rather than scammers. We have to be polite but don't give out any information.

If somebody calls and launches immediately into questions about my house, (insulation, insurance, windows, solar etc.) I sometimes ask them which house they are calling about. They rarely know my address and I certainly don't give it to them. Then if they ask me what I mean I will say my crash pad in the city, the summer house, the family home or the holiday cottage. They usually ring off then.

Occasionally I play dotty old lady - usually when I get calls about my accident. Lots of 'yes dear' replies, basically agreeing with everything they say until they realise it doesn't make sense.

I only do the examples above with annoying ones though, and now that I have discovered 'Smith and Jones, how can I help you?' I don't think I'll be needing them.