My mum has never phoned me

[thinkingcapon]

As in NEVER

She will occasionally message in the last 15 years but has never ever called

Is this odd?

Depends on her reasons. Hard of heating, phone nill, can't work the phone, cba, do you ring her.

She has no hearing issue, she's just not a talker I guess!

Yes I've rung her first all my adult life (40 years now)

When my dad was alive he'd call me for a chat

Same here, at university my friends joked I didn't really have a family as she never rang. She says she wants me to be independent and doesn't want to bother me and is generally pleased if I ring her. But I think it has affected our relationship it feels like she can't be bothered.

I don't think it's odd no, just her preference to message over calling.

My mum was the same. About 15 years ago I started asking for phonecalls instead of birthday presents (unsuccessfully), then about 5 years ago I started joking that whenever she called me I assumed someone was dead. I still get a bit of anxiety when she calls that it is bad news, as calls are so rare, but they are happening more and more. Would just suggest talking to her about it, tell her how you feel (often if that's what it takes). My mum assumes I'm busy constantly and so doesn't want to bother me. In truth I'm rarely so busy I wouldn't take a phone call. It's taken a really long time for us and we're still working on it. Wishing you more luck.

My mother never bothered to call or visit me. She didn't even call me when I had my third baby. I used to visit regularly though. Then, as an experiment, I stopped - just to see what happened - and have now not seen or heard from her at all for 18 months. She just doesn't care. It's sad, but it's her loss.

Can't remember the last time I spoke to my Mum on the phone, but she WhatsApps relentlessly.

My mum never calls me either. I think she is worried about disturbing me (she is an introvert and is quite self-effacing) - she likes to be sure that it's a convenient time for me. It doesn't bother me - I don't mind calling her. We have a good, close relationship.

I don't call my mum and she doesn't call me (thankfully!). We do message though.

I get this. I adore my mum, we're very close but she never ever calls me. She feels as though she may be bothering me and doesn't want to disturb me especially in the evenings with DH. She does the same with my brother. My dad calls me though I've been with her and mum and dad in the same room and when my dad wants to call my brother, my mum will often say "don't disturb him, he maybe busy". It's just the way she is - she's lovely but feels she doesn't want to disturb me but it would be nice to get a call from her rather than my calling her all the time.

I definitely do think this is generational thing regarding "don't want to disturb as she may be busy"
It'd be amazing to look at my phone and see a missed call from her!
Although I'd shit it as would assume an emergency

I don't think that's uncommon tbh.
Those sort of people then complain they haven't heard from you lol.

Mine was the same. When I asked her why she always said she was scared she'd be disturbing me.

I suppose it stems from growing up when you couldn't see who it was ringing so had to answer because you wouldn't know who to call back.

Just tell her you are always happy to hear from her. Every time.

I never phone anyone (barring the occasional admin-type call). I hate the phone, and so although I'm an oldie I have embraced the Gen Z approach to phone calls! It doesn't mean anything re how I feel about people - only how I feel about phone calls.