Post partum - what helped you get back to the old you?

[Bridgertontoofar]

Or how did you find a new you that you were happy with?

So far I'm struggling with finding the time, 2 month old and 2 year old. No motivation. Convenience foods. Drowning sorrows in food. Sciatica. Back is fucked from pregnancy. EXHAUSTED. Feel constantly sweaty and in a faff carting about car seats/putting up and down pram/ running after toddler. 2 stone heavier. Nothing fits. Ribs and hips are bigger. Stretch marks. More cellulite. Section scar.

I've had my nails and hair done and I still feel (and look) like a melted candle.

What you need is a spa weekend with a nice sleep and someone else looking after your baby. However this is unlikely to happen until the youngest is about 3

Ahh it’s tough op, for a while .This will pass. I didn’t have a car so walking was my saviour. The dc slept and I walked off the pounds and felt better mentally. Take it easy with your back but walking can be good for a bad back. But remember it won’t always be this way. Enjoy your babies and take care of yourself.

Honestly for me it was walking. I started putting kids in pram and walking at least 1 hour every morning. By the end of the day doing 10k steps every day. The first week or two was hard but I pushed through and it honestly helped me so much. I found it actually helped my energy levels and I started to not crash after putting the kids in bed in the evenings.

Honestly, you’re in the hardest period and I just remember it all being relentless and exhausting for the first couple of years. Take the small wins, if anyone is able to help with kids or cooking, just take it. Be kind to yourself and don’t put any pressure on.

I started to find time and feel like me when youngest was 2.5-3 (I think would have been earlier if wasn’t for Covid having all at home for so long).

I've put on 3 stones which I can't take off lol

Give yourself time and a bit of grace. Two months postpartum is still very early days. I found that I felt noticeably better every couple of months and felt like myself again at around nine months postpartum. I still have some weight to lose. But the aches and pains, sleep deprivation, weakness etc had all started to wear off, and I began to feel motivated to really look after myself properly again.

Time. Give it plenty of time - I'd say it wasn't until my youngest was over a year old that I started to feel myself. Be kind to yourself, you might need to survive rather than thrive, for a bit anyway but you'll get there ☺️

several things:

1. no you won’t get the old you back, she doesn’t exist any more - sounds harsh but just embrace the new version of yourself. You’ve been through a big change and you won’t just magically go back to how you were before. Stop wanting something that’s not possible. Even if you got back to your old physique you will still be different as a result of having your beautiful second DC.
2. agree with the walking suggestion
3. go to a shop you like - I went to M&S because it’s a nice safe bet - try on loads of jeans/tops/trousers or whatever you want until you find styles and sizes that fit you. Then go on Vinted and search for those items. At 2 months post partum you’ll still be changing shape so probably not worth spending a small fortune on a new wardrobe but I bought 4 pairs of jeans, 2 shirts and a jacket and spent £32 so won’t feel too awful if they only do me for the rest of the year while I’m finding my size.
4. Make sure you get at least half an hour a day alone. I like to put DH in charge of the kids and go for a shower and then do my hair etc while listening to a podcast with headphones in so I can’t hear the background chaos. If your DC won’t leave you alone for that long then just go out for a walk.

1. Stretchy cotton t shirt dresses - M&S have some lovely ones and they’ll accommodate a bit of weight fluctuation.
2. Add tanning drops to your moisturiser - just 2 or 3 but they’ll give you a bit of a glow without having to do the whole body to match
3. Shower/bathe at night so DP/DH can take the baby if they wake up, so you have time to shave and do a hair mask etc and you can take your time
4. Buy one of those 1l drinks bottles and keep it under the pram

But agree that you won’t be the old you for a
while - it’ll take about 18 months really, so go easy on yourself

Oooh time, you're only 2 months in, right now you need to look after and be kind to yourself. You are right in the depths of the hard not and should not put pressure on yourself. To be honest though the thing which made me feel more myself was losing the weight. Once I did that I had more energy and could exercise. And I wanted to take more care of myself because I felt good. Yes I'm probably vain. I understand that losing weight is not that easy. (Breast feeding and lots of walking seemed to help me).