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Original poster

NHS - Children having ears pinned back?

24 replies

Awcw1234 · 17/06/2024 19:34

Is this available on the NHS or can you only get it done privately?

My child is 10 and has always had sticky out ears. Her Dad, Grandad and Uncle all had their ears pinned back as children so unfortunately she has inherited them.

I think she is perfect as she is but unfortunately she has started criticising herself and they are affecting her confidence.

We have the money to pay privately but Im wondering if we could have them done on the NHS?

OP posts:
Iloveeverycat · 17/06/2024 19:53

I think it is possible in some circumstances so worth a chat with Doctor.
I know this won't help now but I know someone when their baby was born with very sticking out ears they were told to put tape on them as the cartalidge is still very soft and doesn't harden for about 18 months.

beigetea · 17/06/2024 20:02

My child had their ears pinned back on the nhs. They said they were only doing them as we'd been on the waiting list for so long.
It's worth a try. This was Easter this year.

Gwtw10 · 17/06/2024 20:07

My Daughter had hers pinned back in 2022 aged 13- we were on the waiting list approx 8 months, quick recovery and made such a difference to her self confidence

hjlm · 17/06/2024 20:10

Scotland, nephew 12 referred February should be done over summer. Bullying. 😢

Original poster
Awcw1234 · 17/06/2024 20:19

Maybe it is worth me talking her to the GP.
Will I need to take her with me or can I just take photos?
I don’t want to damage her confidence by making a big deal infront of a GP.
She is a very quiet thing. She won’t admit they are bothering her to someone she doesn’t know.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 17/06/2024 20:22

Awcw1234 · 17/06/2024 20:19

Maybe it is worth me talking her to the GP.
Will I need to take her with me or can I just take photos?
I don’t want to damage her confidence by making a big deal infront of a GP.
She is a very quiet thing. She won’t admit they are bothering her to someone she doesn’t know.

To have them done she will need to admit it to them, they won’t consider a surgery like that without being sure it’s her choice and for the right reasons.

I had mine done at the same age and have never regretted it but even 30 years ago the surgeon needed to know it was my choice.

Original poster
Awcw1234 · 17/06/2024 20:29

Will that be the case if we go private too?
It will 100% be her choice but she doesn’t open up easily.

OP posts:
Original poster
Awcw1234 · 17/06/2024 20:30

Plus she has told me she wants them fixing but she is very scared of the procedure so I can imagine her saying she is fine because she frightened :(

OP posts:
WetBandits · 17/06/2024 20:35

My best friend did when we were 12 (so about 18 years ago), she has no regrets at all and it improved her confidence and self esteem beyond measure.

Oblomov24 · 17/06/2024 20:48

Take photos and speak to Gp. Push hard and be persistent, don't take no for an answer.

Original poster
Awcw1234 · 17/06/2024 20:57

Do you think they’d speak to me without her being present?

OP posts:
AnonAnom940 · 17/06/2024 23:41

Get her into a swimming club. The swimming hat will squash them flat

stressedespresso · 17/06/2024 23:44

Awcw1234 · 17/06/2024 20:29

Will that be the case if we go private too?
It will 100% be her choice but she doesn’t open up easily.

I’m sorry OP but you are being a bit ridiculous here. I had a shy 10 year old too so understand where you are coming from but this is a serious matter that she needs to be directly involved in. No surgeon will consider operating on her (and rightly so) unless she is able to verbalise to them for herself that they are effecting her self esteem and she wants the corrective surgery done. I know that this isn’t the case but you’re risking the GP thinking that it’s you, not her who is pushing for the operation.

Chypre · 17/06/2024 23:54

Maybe AIBU but definitely there are plenty of children with ears sticking out a bit, but almost never - adults. And mind it, pinning of the ears is not even a thing in many countries (not many countries have local NHS alternative). So… Unless there is bullying, she might just outgrow it?

Original poster
Awcw1234 · 18/06/2024 07:38

She isn’t going to say “I want surgery” though. She has told me she wants them fixing but the thought of surgery understandably frightens her. We had to take her to A&E recently with suspected appendicitis and she was telling the doctors she was fine (whilst in pain) as she didn’t want the fingerprint blood test!

Chrype - she is currently in Primary so thankfully she hasn’t experienced bullying. However, some of her friends have pointed out her ears stick out and now my daughter describes her ears as “elf ears”. I can only assume that once she gets to high school, she’ll become more insecure about them and others may tease her. High school kids can be cruel. Her ears don’t just stick out a bit, they stick out a lot. They are hereditary and many family members have had the op.

OP posts:
Revelatio · 18/06/2024 07:43

It doesn’t sound like she’s ready. They’re not going to do a cosmetic procedure with just the word of the parent as they don’t know if you’re forcing her into it (obviously you’re not, but some people might).

Wait until she feels more comfortable talking about it.

Sirzy · 18/06/2024 07:51

I was the super shy 10 year old getting them done so I do get your point but no surgeon would do an elective surgery without informed consent and knowing she understands the after care and things.

Original poster
Awcw1234 · 18/06/2024 08:04

Definitely not forcing her into it. She is perfect as she is in my eyes. I just don’t want it affecting her confidence anymore than it already has done. If she was to get it done, I would rather she gets it done within the next year before high school. Last thing I want is her hitting her teens and her confidence taking a nose dive.

OP posts:
frozendaisy · 18/06/2024 08:05

She's 10, so can understand.

Explain to her how the other family members had their ears pinned, get them to talk to her about their recovery.

Show her pictures of before and after.

And explain to her waiting lists, and how you can't do this for her. But if she speaks to GP no one would know.

The benefit of private is you could book in the beginning of summer holiday perhaps so she would be recovered and the change in ears happen outside school time.

If she wants it I would nudge her to get it done before secondary school, and privately so you have control over when.

But you need to engage her. If she is not ready for a medical procedure cosmetically the surgeon won't do it.

So start with her and when she feels ready go to GP and take it from there.

Original poster
Awcw1234 · 18/06/2024 08:37

Yes, we are leaning towards the private option as it seems to be quite difficult to get the operation on the NHS and I don’t really want her having the operation in term time.

Thinking we could get her booked in over July next year (End of Y6) before high school starts.
Dad thankfully has before and after photos of his operation and can talk to her about his experience X

OP posts:
Kendodd · 18/06/2024 08:56

Personally, I wouldn't push this. I'd wait until she's a bit older and can speak up a bit for herself. I know you are acting in her best interests advocating for her, up going forward in life, she needs to learn to advocate for herself, I realise 10 is very young though. Are you certain she wouldn't admit to it being a problem at the doctors office?

Wordsofprey · 18/06/2024 10:48

My friend from school had this done on the NHS as a child. That was about 20 years ago, I don't see why they wouldn't still do it. You can get coke nose surgically fixed on the NHS so seems unreasonable for them not to extend that grace to children who may suffer bullying (wrongly may I add as I'm sure your girl is gorgeous and wonderful). Ask the right people and amp up the bullying and self confidence angle, that it's making your daughter really low and she's suffering because of it.

Mudgarden · 18/06/2024 11:00

It would be a shame if she won't do it.
My parents talked half heartedly about getting mine done when I was a child, but never did anything. They were the kind of people who didn't like to "bother the doctors" and probably thought the doctor would just say I was vain and there was nothing wrong with me.
I'm in my 60s and wish I'd had it done when I was a child and would have been eligible for NHS treatment. One ear isn't too bad now but the other one looks ridiculous. It sticks right out and curls forward at the top. I've been limited in the hairstyles I can have because it pokes through. I've always been very self conscious about it.

CheltenhamLady · 18/06/2024 13:43

One of my sons had sticky-out ears. He was scheduled to get them done when he was younger but at the last moment, he couldn't go through with it. He regretted it when he was an adult and last year (at the age of 38) paid privately to have them done. He is very, very pleased with the result.
I would pay for the operation OP, you can schedule the surgery to suit and the whole experience is calmer. From memory, it cost in the region of 2.5k

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