Help me not murder my preschooler today!

[AllTheUsernamesLeftAreShit]

Despite being 4.5, DD still sleeps like absolute shit. I averaged just over 5 hours sleep a night last week with a three hour stretch being about as good as it gets.

Last night she got up five bloody times and l, through some excellent tag teaming with DH getting ready for work like a herd of elephants, have been up since 4am on less than four hours broken sleep. Frankly, today I want everyone one to fuck of and leave me alone in silence but instead DD and I are all alone together until about 6:30. Disney+ and cbeebies is available on tap and I can't be bothered to argue with her about eating less ginger nuts. Any other tips to help me get through today without being the world's worst mum?

Everyone fed, nobody dead.

PJs and movies and picnic in front of the TV. Chuck them out into the garden for ten minutes to find "five red things" or some such shit.

You will be fine.

My three and a half year old is the same! She woke up three times last night.

Im a single parent and I co sleep but my patience was wearing very thin and this morning I was terribly snappy with her before nursery. I now am feeling terrible mum guilt, but four hours sleep, a preschooler and a full time job is a hard juggle!

Luckily it isn't raining so throwing her outside intermittently is a good shout! She's currently watching Up so that's hopefully a little peace.

@whitefluffytrainers93 the snappiness just makes you feel awful, doesn't it? It's so hard not to be irritable when someone won't let you sleep though.

Also @AllTheUsernamesLeftAreShit I love your username! It kind of sums up how you feel!

Yes, my daughter had a great weekend. Loads of trips, presents and fun! She went to sleep holding these little toys but woke up the third time crying that she couldn't find them. I got really snappy then felt so bad and cuddled her and couldn't sleep for the guilt!!! Then she woke up at 6am demanding I get up and go and colour with her, again I got snappy and then felt bad so I went and coloured with her!!! I feel your pain

I've been known to blow the budget on a day trip to a family farm or theme park on days like these. It turns a negative into a positive and tires them out. It also passes the time very quickly and mostly enjoyably. Good luck!

Little activities that can be calm for you too - you can play that she's a massage therapist and has to massage your feet (or head if you're tickly) whilst you relax.

Or give her a pad and pencil and she has to draw you while you're asleep being SUPER careful not to wake you up!

Or get her to help with chores - how many items can you put in the toy basket before the timer goes off? Can you separate all this laundry into Mummy's pile, Daddy's pile and your pile?

I should say, this well-meaning advice comes from someone whose days like these were (thankfully) five or so years ago, so it's been a while since I was actually in the throes of googling boarding schools for 4 year-olds.