I was offered a seat on the tube this morning

[Dryplate]

I'm female, 54, healthy looking afaik . Not overweight, so unlikely to be mistaken for pregnant, even if I was young enough, I was wearing comfortable shoes, no heavy bags.

I'd been stood for a couple of stops when the woman in the seat nearby jumped up and insisted I took her seat. At the time I assumed she was about to get off but no, she stayed on several more stops and took a seat when one became available.

She must have been at least as old as me

So, what was that about?

I always offer a seat if the train/bus is full as I don't care about standing. I'll offer to anyone. Makes me feel guilty looking at someone standing!

Well she must have thought you needed it more than she did for some reason. Simple as that so she did whst she thought was the right thing.

That's awful. Parents should teach their children some manners in that they stand for older people and definitely do not sit in the seats for disabled/elderly if there are people on the bus that need them.

I think in these times where everyone has their nose in their phone, people don't always notice someone who needs a seat, but on my very crowded train this evening, a pregnant woman very politely said "excuse me would anyone mind me having a seat?" and at least 6 people jumped up.

How is it rude to decline? When I was pregnant, the baby was pushing everything up so I had terrible acid reflux. The only way to alleviate it was to stand up super straight. I couldn’t sit down without this acid rising up and wanting to vomit. So, had to strike a balance between standing whenever I could and then only giving up and sitting when I was tired and needed to. I refused offer of seats all the time, because if I sat down, I might vomit. It was lovely of them to offer as it could have been one of the times where I was exhausted and needed to sit, and would have been very welcome. But when it wasn’t… why was I not allowed to say no, according to you?

Maybe she was about to get off and changed her mind.

My friend (53) fell over recently, she had a number of people rush over to help her up and one said don’t worry dear let us help you as she was struggling to get up due to her oversized puffa coat 😆😆😆luckily she saw the funny side

people are being king surely it’s nice to be reminded that there are kind people out there

I’ve often had people give up their seat for me and all the time when I was pregnant I’m good at giving the I need a seat vibe

Unless I was elderly, infirm or obviously pregnant, I’d be either patronised or insulted.

I'd be quite pleased someone gave up their seat for me. But I was 9 months pregnant and had people quickly stare down at their shoes so as not to make eye contact lol. Perhaps she thought maybe you were tired and it was a nice gesture. Sounds like you accepted it anyway!

Then that's on you.
I would be grateful for the offer and thought behind it and certainly wouldn't be wasting my time wondering about ulterior motives or what did that person mean by...

I would wonder why they did offer you a seat if seemingly the same age but I suppose people are just being kind, this reminds me of a time I was in a London pub with my Dad, Whitehall area and went to an old haunt, my Dad had broken his leg me had crutches leaning on the chair in between us, we were sitting near a couple of men standing at the bar chatting, mid 30s and I was a similar age, I pushed my chair back to get up as I was about to hit another round and before I had even got up, one of the men went towards my chair to pull it out and asked if he could help? My first though was we are a similar age, I have young children, do I look that shattered but then realised he obviously thought I was the one with the crutches as I looked confused and said I was fine. It looked like he realised as well but a bit awkward.

This was our experience on holiday in Madeira. We’ve been a few times.
Massively crowded busses but folks stood up to offer seats to older passengers.
If was, to say the least, heartwarming and to appreciated.
I wish it was like this in the UK.

Ds2 has one of the Offer Me A Seat Badges. He has dyspraxia and is deaf. He could stand up and hold the toggle. The think that worries me is if he loses his balance and falls, it's not just him, but who he might take with him. On ocassion he has forgotten his badge and I've got on the tube and asked if someone will give up their seat and people are generally kind.

This made me proper laugh.

I knew perfectly well why I was offered a seat when I was fat in a bad dress. DH did suggest I didn't wear it again

Still a seat's a seat isn't it? I counted it as a win.

I'm visually impaired and every time I visit London I get so many offers of help on the Tube and out and about, it genuinely restores my faith in humanity as in my own area it never happens!

This includes either being offered a seat if it's busy, or people moving down a quiet carriage so I can grab a seat close to the doors.

I do use a white cane though, so it's a little more obvious I have a disability.

I'm not sure why she offered you a seat in this case OP, but the fact she did, again helps restore my faith in humanity :)

Maybe when she looks in the mirror she still sees the 20 something version of herself looking back, kind of a reverse body dysmorphia so genuinely thought you were older than her? Or maybe you unconsciously sighed and she thought you had had a particularly stressful day. To be honest, unless you see her again and ask her you will never know her reasons!

I have been offered a couple of times, accepted the first time but subsequently politely declined as I still remember sitting down and feeling their body warmth on the seat (heaves)

Oh that is so bad, what a shame no one offered her a seat. In fact it’s a disgrace. I wish your Mum no longer had to travel by bus, but I know people are independent.

As a little girl I was with my lovely grandmother on a bus, in a busy city, when the bus braked suddenly, and to our horror, a little old lady went tumbling by.

I know people rushed to help her, but I’m not sure what happened after that, no ambulance was called.

I was too young to really help, but I think my Grandmother did, and lots of younger people than her went to help the lady.

After her flying past, into the front well and steps of the bus, I dread to think how she managed to get where she was going that day, without being in a lot of pain.

My own mum suffered a broken wrist in a fall on the bus, but she would no longer attempt to get on a bus by herself now, and is in her late 80’s and not really steady enough for buses anymore.

Never realised it would be rude to decline. Was offered a few times when I was very pregnant but only by older ladies and I thought they needed it more than me as I was feeling perfectly fine so always politely declined.

It happened to me in the tube at rush hour in London. I was 25-30 and a size 6! I happily took the seat but still wonder why.