Feeling guilty I don’t have savings pots for my children

[Boohoo123456]

I feel I’ve failed my kids as I don’t have the means to save much for their financial future.

everyone around me has multiple accounts.

i have a small saving account which I try and stash some in for my eldest and then will do same for my youngest… but it’s also an emergency / holiday account so dip in and out of it.

We just don’t Have the means to squirrel away large amounts of money.

we do however own our own property worth 400k. This is all we have… but for a family of four (two house deposits and two pensions) is not really enough.

i feel like a shit parent.

i feel like nothing I can do is enough.

if I work I’m neglecting their emotional needs and if I don’t work then all our future is fucked.

AIBU?

I think that's great advice from Sonowitsme.

But also, don't beat yourself up about this. My parents are wealthy but have not helped us out financially at all. I don't resent them for it, genuinely. There are ways for young adults to save for a house deposit without financial help from parents. My sister and I have both managed.

Do you already own your house outright, or have a mortgage? If you already own outright, then there's no reason you can't start saving little by little here and there.

The house will likely be worth considerably more than £400k by the time you retire/downsize/have adult kids.

Lots can happen in the next 10-20 years! Stop beating yourself up and making other parents who don't have a £400k house to fall back on feel even more rubbish for providing less.

We are not what I would call well off but start young enough and you could have a decent pot for your children. For your newborn, £15 a month into a stocks and shares jisa. That'll give around £7500 at a very rough guesstimate at 18. For your 11 year old start thinking what you would be expected to help out with at univ. If you could manage to put away £100 a month in a high interest account that would go some way. It's quite a lot though but really, anything you can squirrel away is a lovely help.

But if your house is worth 400k how much are you going to give them to set up their own homes are you just going to live in a tent somewhere So you can provide for your children?

We couldn't afford to give our kids house deposits we don't have that wealth I don't feel guilty or that I've failed them.

Op don't worry about far future take baby steps mow re saving.
You will be astonished how it grows.

Don't beat yourself up about it. It's so tough at the moment with money. We've put barely anything into our kids account since covid except some bits of birthday and christmas money.