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Raging 12 yr old boy - help

3 replies

ParentOfAngryTween · 30/05/2024 20:42

My 12 year old DS, is currently stomping round the house because DH and I asked him to revise for some exams that will take place after half term. He told us he doesn't care about the tests, he hates us etc.

I don't know how to deal with him. I'm trying to stay calm but it's difficult when he's throwing his duvet around the bedroom. We've apparently stressed him out and it's all our fault. We find him utterly exhausting at the moment. He's like a ball of rage. I've spoken to him about his life, asked if there is any bullying or struggling at school. He says No. He hates homework and I think he feels overwhelmed. I've been sitting with him and have tried to create a revision timetable and have been sitting in his room to give moral support - I can't really help esp with Maths!

Is this all normal? He's year 8.

OP posts:
Chocolateteabag · 30/05/2024 21:01

Sorry but I have a very similar 13 year old (Y8)
When he is ranting, best thing is to ignore and let him work it out
Maybe get him to relax by watching some tv together

The Y8 exams aren't going to be a huge thing - just the start of getting used to exams ahead of gcse

If he has a rage of hormones going on inside, better to work on how to manage that. When they are in a full rant, only time or distraction will calm them down. Don't bother with threats/shouting / rational talking - go for tv distraction or a cuddle and comfort food

Chocolateteabag · 30/05/2024 21:02

Try suggesting revision in the morning - never try past 6pm!

TotallyKerplunked · 30/05/2024 21:05

Stop stressing him out about a few end of year tests! Making him a revision timetable and sitting with him while he revises is probably raising his stress levels and making him act out. Its his revision, let him organise it how he wants, as long as he does some.

I've got a year 8 doing tests as well. I've made him a comfortable space, given him plenty of snacks and left him too it. He knows he can come to me for help.

I work in a secondary school, the pressure in schools during exams is intense and far more than I had as a kid. Let him relax a bit at home so he doesn't burn out.

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