Do you waft or are you a pack pony?

[AlltheFs]

Does anyone else feel like they always manage to miss the mark for successful family days out?

Some people seem to waft about effortlessly with just the right bag, and always have the right shoes, right clothes, right coat for the occasion.

I feel like I trudge about like a pack pony, always just a bit too hot/cold/wet with sore feet and a bag that is always too big or too small looking scruffy with too much to carry.

I’m out tomorrow on a day trip to an attraction with DD, picnic in the fridge ready but I know I probably have too much food, don’t know what to wear because the weather is all over the place and not sure which bag to take.

DD is 4 and because she is slight she still needs a fold up toilet seat or she won’t go (fell in a public toilet once and is still traumatised). She can also still have an occasional accident when enjoying herself somewhere new, and she’s the child that if there’s a way of getting wet or muddy she will find it. So we always need an outfit and spare pants, wipes, suncream, hat. I don’t take the massive nappy bag from baby/toddler days (although still have it) as it’s too heavy but it still feels like a lot of stuff.

How do the wafty people do it? I have visions of a bag like Hermione’s in Deathly Hallows…

Does anyone else always feel “wrong” at such things? Or is it just me?

I've always been a pack pony - it's definitely not just you! It's exhausting sometimes but it does get easier as the amount of stuff they need goes down. That said, my DS is 17 now and I'm still usually carrying his coat, hoodie, charger and water bottle by the end of the day!

I don't know the answer as I'm the same as you 😭 I just somehow never feel both prepared and serene at the same time.

I think it’s just age! I feel like when my kids were younger we hauled about everything and the kitchen sink but as they’ve got older, firstly, they can carry their own coats and things, plus I don’t really take food now, I just factor the cost into a day out. I might take a few snacks but that’s it.
I do use a backpack handbag though which is spacious and has room for things like spare socks and raincoats. I also have a small first aid kit with me solely because once my son cut his finger and I was going “ummm, just hold it up in the air” and a woman swooped in and cleaned it with a wipe and put on a plaster and I vowed “I will be that woman for someone else”.

I bring loads of stuff on a day out, but I don't think it's too much. I like being the prepared parent who whips out the puddlesuits so my dcs can carry on playing in the mud, or our sand toys and splash clothes for the playground, and sun cream and hats when the sun comes out. I bring lots of food and snacks as we're often out for the whole day. Always have a full spare outfit and lots of nappies. Some pens and books for the journey.

When my DC were small I was such a pack pony. I carried everything for every possible occasion. Never wanted to be caught out.

These days as it's just me off to work or out and about I try to do the insouciant waft carrying the minimum - but usually fail miserably.

As a mum 30 years ago I was so organised and prepared ! Thought I was ok with grandchild and confident,but now she has been diagnosed with Coeliac Disease I have genuinely lost my confidence.
Absolutely no opportunity to grab a snack anywhere without checking for GF places ,an absolute game changer.😫

Pack pony here. Backpack is the only way I function. Children older now, so also have backpacks, and everyone carries their own stuff.

Do you have a backpack OP? A big comfy backpack (that doesn't look like a trekking pack) is a must imo. It can hold loads and gives you free use of your hands and arms/shoulders which really helps you feel confident in moving around and much less awkward holding a child's hand or buying icecream or whatever as you don't have to put your bag/s down to do it. You're still a packhorse but from the front you look more like yourself. If you add a small cross body with your phone/wallet/keys/pack of wipes then you can also easily get to those things without unloading everything else.

I think I was a wafting pack pony!!
At 4 your daughter is old enough for a little backpack of her own, she could easily carry a spare change of clothes and some wipes.
I didn't bother with picnics, too much to carry and always ended up warm/soggy/with sand in something etc. It is expensive eating out but I sucked up the cost for the convenience and regret nothing!!
If you are regularly ending up with sore feet take a good look at your footwear choices, there are some really comfy trainers out at the moment with memory foam insoles (I think they are aimed at runners!) they have some really nice designs so will look good with jeans etc.
If you are regularly too hot/cold study the weather before you set off! Layers are your best bet, vest top, thin jumper/long sleeved top, thin, lightweight waterproof jacket.

I "waft". I really trim back what we bring with us. For most outings I take my small backpack with kids water bottles, a snack each, plasters and wound spray in case they fall and a couple of nappies in case no toilet is available.

The other trick is to keep things in the car - we keep hats, suncream, change of clothes and more nappies in there.

I don't bother with wet wipes, they take up so much space and if the kids get mucky I just take them to a toilet to wash their hands and faces. Because of this even though I feel very comfortable and streamlined on outings we often look a bit messy!

I am doing all this on easy mode though. We live in the tropics so clothing requirements never vary and my shoe choice is always flip flops lol.

Oh yes I have backpacks, 3 different sized ones-but they make me look ridiculous and as I say, the size is never right. Add a cross body bag and that completes the sweaty crumpled look, squashed tits that then look even bigger, red face. In every photo I look hideous. It’s not helped by being short.

There’s no cure I think if you actually take stuff. My awe is for the people that seem to take nothing.