PTA parents

[CultOfRamen]

My child is leaving primary school this year.
I remember her first year of school and being determined to join the pta.
somehow this never happened, presumably because I work full time and it never felt like there was enough time.
I recently met another mum at my daughter extra curricular (which is a huge commitment) and she was talking about her three children and their seperate extra curriculars, being on the pta at both schools (one child has a scholarship to a different school to the others) and working.

also on mumsnet it seems like everyone is in the pta?

am I just a shitty parent for never making the effort- or is there a particular kind of mum that makes the pta?

also what do they actually do and does it benefit your kid?

There's barely anyone in our secondary school PTA and it's really hard to get parent engagement so you are not alone with never being a member.

Our school has a PTA and a parent council. Parent Council deals more with in school issues and the running of the school. PTA is about fund raising to help school funds and plug gaps in funding where its lacking

I have been a member of both for a few years but this is my last term as my ds is leaving this year and I will have no children left at school.

also on mumsnet it seems like everyone is in the pta?

You must be joking.

13 years on Mumset has taught me how many people seem to hate PTA members.

They're so often called 'Queen Bee types' and other misogynistic terms.

i enjoyed helping out and raising money for the school, as it benefited all of the children including my own. I work full time, so only did the school run once a week, so helping out at events was a way for me to feel connected to the school and to my children.

Our school PTA was just a group of frazzled parents just trying our best for the school. Parents and families forget that we are volunteering our free time and we have to work around the everyday running of the school, so it isn't easy.

i never judged anyone for not helping out, as i know life is busy and it's not everyone's 'thing'.

As above, our pta is all busy, frazzled working parents who just want to support the school. I really struggle to find the time but I know the school is woefully underfunded so I help where I can.

Without the pta our inner London state school would have far fewer resources, less play equipment, many families could not fund trips for their kids and there would be no events (summer fair, spring disco etc). So just a poorer experience for all the kids and worse working environment for the teachers.

I was on my daughter's primary PTA.
Out of approximately 1200 potential parents there were about 20 - 25 regulars on the PTA.
Very few people actually want to do it (and they shouldn't have to if they don't want to).

There's barely anyone in our secondary school PTA and it's really hard to get parent engagement

That... and our PTA is wonderful. There's one guy who basically holds the whole thing together. He's hyper organised & considerate. Our meetings are always quick, efficient & a warm laugh. My youngest is finishing at the secondary school & I'll miss that small group.

So hard to get other parents involved, though.

I did 1 year on the PTA for each of my kids. Met some nice people just trying to raise money and put on nice events for the kids. I would urge everyone to get involved. Even if you can't commit to a proper 'role' volunteer for that 30 min slot at the school fete. It really makes such a difference.

I think by the time your kids have got to secondary stage, as a parent you've generally got a lot more on your plate than what you might have had at lower primary (IF you were lucky enough to be able to only work PT, or as a SAHP for a year or two). It stands to reason that parental engagement will drop off, I don't blame any parents for that. They are still supporting the school if they're making sure their children are in school on time, in the correct uniform and are navigating secondary successfully, keeping up academically etc, making sure they're eating well, backing school up if their child has committed a misdemeanour at school etc etc.

SEcondary is far less sociable for parents than primary is, you don't stand at the school gate chatting to anyone anymore, so not many secondary parents know each other so less likely to want to attend school events where there is socialising with other parents. Parents also tend to have fundraising fatigue by the time they reach secondary. They've been there, done that, baked the cakes, manned a stall at the school fair, wrapped the Santa gifts etc etc.. The children grow out of some things too like that, too, of course, and they pull back from wanting to do things with theiri parents being in attendance too.

I would bet my bottom dollar that most secondary parents would just be happy to throw money at the PTA to "do their bit" for fundraising. I do that myself. I'm very grateful for what the PTA do do, eg organsing the yearly raffle etc, but I just don't see the need for the same level of involvement as at primary. It's a completely different focus at secondary.

So don't be downhearted or think that parents are just not interested in supporting the school. They just have other priorities by that stage of their lives, and the kids have grown up a bit too.

Our secondary PTA is disbanding, no one (including me) can step up. We're just pushing the monthly dd instead.

I was SAHP until this year, oldest in upper primary now. I thought about the PTA a few times, but I already had fatigue from life admin & couldn't face being given more menial/no one else wants to do it type tasks & not having an actual say in anything as the experienced members would get that side of it.

I also knew I'd be on the fringes (where I seem to end up everywhere) as the PTA parents had all been there for a while so it was unappealing.

If they'd ask outside the PTA for help with certain tasks I'd do what I could, but we never even hear what they're doing. There's still a pie drive every year but I don't see/hear anything else. Out of sight, out of mind, I suppose.

I joined the PTA when my DD started - partly because we were new to the school, & I wanted to make friends with other parents, & partly because I felt it was a good thing to do & a good example to my DC.
Within a year I was made Chair when the last one moved away. I've been the Chair ever since, & expect I will remain so until my DS leaves the school (9 years in total) as no one wants to take it on. Although it might collapse in a few years as most of the PTA parents will be leaving, & no one else has joined for 2 years.
I enjoy it & find it frustrating in equal measure. I work part-time so can put more time into it, but the rest of the PTA parents all work full time. No SAHP on our PTA atm.
We run events - small scale as it's a tiny village primary - so a Halloween party, refreshments at Sports Day & Village Fete; ice lollies after school, non-uniform days etc. we fund extras for the school & help with trip costs, treats for the children etc. It makes the school experience better for the children & takes the pressure off the school to find funds for extras.
For the PP who said they don't know what the PTA does & don't get asked to help - it's probably just because the PTA are sick of asking & no-one offering. TBH I've stopped asking too, as no one bothers unless they're already on the PTA. It's incredibly dispiriting to ask if someone/anyone can just give 10mins to cover a bathroom break at the fete & it's just tumbleweed.
If you want to be involved - ask, seek out the Chair etc.