We moved up to Edinburgh 13 years ago from the midlands for our graduate jobs & further study, built our careers, got married up here and recently started a family.
But we find ourselves 300+ miles away from all our other family, we have an 11 month old and another baby on the way now later in the year (yes 2 under 2! 🙈).
Plus our sis in law is also pregnant, so cousins are on the way as well which is exciting.
Our parents aren't getting any younger and we'd like our children to know their family well. This isn't even about needing childcare but yes the odd night off would be welcomed too!
Really swithering as to whether we move back south to be closer to family.
The main concern for us is that hubs has a longstanding brilliant job in Edinburgh. My own job isnt all rosy so im willing to find a new opportunity elsewhere - but his company are amazing as the salary, nice team mates, 1 year paternity leave, plus other perks like bonuses, away days and the high percentage paid by the company into his pension etc are just far too good to give up in a way. It has essentially afforded us this life we have and the employers are headquartered and only located in Edinburgh.
Family is absolutely important of course, but hubs is convinced he will never find another job/ company that even comes close to what he has currently, and we are trying to second guess what the hybrid/ remote working policy will be come next year after his company move to their new offices.
It also might not be feasible even for us to move further south but him travel up on the train for say 2-3 days a week in the office in Edinburgh. I feel that the cost of trains and hotels, commute timings and him being away from us a lot will make it not worth doing almost. It would be a huge risk to move and then be told he can't do remote work/ live elsewhere too.
Plus we love our area, family community feel etc - there's just so much going on up here in and around Edinburgh too. The opportunities for the children in future, access to spectacular scenic countryside, beaches and activities, schooling etc far exceed what is available nearer family. Then again that's what we grew up with, and we were happy enough as kids as we knew no better.
We've just absolutely been spoilt with the "good" life up here but our parents aren't getting any younger and we'd love our kids to grow up knowing their family and new cousins on the way! It's just so tricky giving up what we have grown/ built up here.
Has anyone else been in this tough situation and could help shed any light/ give a different perspective on things?
Feeling so torn, just wish we could move our family closer.
Sick of being on the road going up and down the A1 all the time 😅 but would certainly miss Edinburgh life massively if we moved back down south permanently. I don't want to move back, or even a bit nearer to them, to somewhere we don't really know, and then seriously regret it.
Grateful for any advice 🙏 thank you for reading 😅