DS 9 riddled with headlice, have tried everything under the sun. Please help!

[Hanarb]

DS 9 has been riddled with lice for 3 weeks now. I have tried treatment and spent nearly £100 on various remedies. He has very long, thick surfy hair and it is a nightmare to treat. His teacher has notified me which is mortifying. His childminder said she would get the clippers and shave his hair off (I’m not sure if she was joking). I don’t own any hair cutting equipment but this is seriously taking up so much of my time and causing a lot of stress. What should I do?

Good grief, deal with this yourself. Get his head clear of head lice then take him to the hairdresser. How would you like having your head shaved? Your child’s head lice isn’t the childminders problem to solve. I’m surprised she’s actually allowing him to continue to go as you said earlier he “was crawling”. Head lice jump from head to head.

It is more cruel to his childminder, and the other kids she (assuming it is a she) looks after, to send your DS there riddled with headlice and spread them freely around. Catch yourself on.

This. what’s wrong with you?!

None of the rest of the family have them which is peculiar and makes me think that part of the problem is coming from his school.

I used a Nitty Gritty comb on my mixed race daughter's long and very curly hair. You need to use loads of conditioner and a wider tooth comb first. The Nitty Gritty comb really catches hold of them.

The eggs probably just haven’t hatched yet on everyone else.

Surely he is old enough for you to explain the choices and consequences.

He needs to sit still long enough for you to do a thorough job, for as long as that takes till the infestation is cleared.

Or

He needs to have his hair cut to a manageable length and then be prepared to take care of it.

My son has very long - well past his shoulders - wavy hair and we live at the beach so actually is surfer hair. He is now 11 and knows he has to consistently look after his hair. Brush, condition, wash, sort out the matts and knots daily.

That’s the responsibility of long hair, you would not leave a girl with knotty, unmanageable, lice infested hair, no different for boys surely

You need to give him a choice.

He needs to sit still and put up with having it treated daily (which with conditioner and a comb may make 2 hours to do properly) or he can have it cut short.

Short it will still need daily combing but will take much less time.

The only way to do this is ditch the chemicals, buy a good nit comb and cheap conditioner.

The section the hair and be really really diligently.

You need to do this every day for a week and then every other day for the next 3 weeks to make sure you have broken the laying cycle.

No I just pay her to look after him (more of an au pair/nanny) so no risk

This is the most effective method.

Last time I checked the eggs don’t take 3 weeks to hatch.

Have you treated all the family? They spread so easily even if you don’t think the others have them. If he’s had them for 3 weeks, I can almost guarantee the rest of you do.

Plenty of parents of girls with long hair will have done the combing regime. If you have long hair you just have to comb regularly ans a preventative measure. I always nit comb my girls’ hair at the start at end of every school holiday and if lice are going round the school every week. Their hair is always tied up for school.

One tip for you though is that some of the treatments are very drying and some are very oily. The latter makes the combing much easier. We tried a treatment once that was so drying it was hard to get a comb though at all and we had to start again with a load of conditioner. When mine had nits, we had one week of combing every day and then two weeks of every other day. It’s hard work but the combing does work. If you can’t do that then yes I’d shave the hair as it sounds in pretty bad condition anyway.

@Hanarb
If he won't sit still for you to comb it then he needs to understand that he can't keep his hair long. Thick long and curly hair is hard work.
I used to plait my daughter's hair but then she decided she wanted a ponytail instead and she didn't comb it properly or let me do it, and it got in a state. It took me a month of regular combing to sort it out.

“Crawling” was an exaggeration from a stressed mother. He just seems to keep getting them for the last 3 weeks. But you make a good suggestion. Perhaps I’ll join him in solidarity.

You need to do his head in smaller sections of the comb still won't go through.

I have back length tight ringlets. My hair is very very thick.

A comb can get through anything if the section is small enough.

Tiny sections. Plenty of conditioner. Nitty gritty. Tonnes of patience. Using the treatments alone won't kill everything.

If not you'll have to cut it.

No, I have thoroughly checked the others, they are only home at weekends due to being at boarding school so this may be a factor. However they are 100% clear and so are myself and DH.

@AStrawberryTart
Head lice can't jump but they can crawl so if heads touch then they can pass to another person.
My dad used to call them the 'gallopers' when we were kids.

“Crawling” was an exaggeration from a stressed mother.

Well you did also use the word "riddled" twice, and you've had comments from his teacher, plus his childminder is offering to cut his hair. So it does sound pretty bad.

I sympathise as I also prefer a slightly longer hair cut on my young ds.

But everyone has a limit, and I’d have grabbed the clippers roughly 2 weeks ago in your shoes.

God, I feel for you. @Pallisers is right with the olive oil thing. I had 4 DC - 2 boys, 2 girls, with the boys I just cut it really short for a while, with my girls I did the olive oil with a hard metal comb and paper towels after all of the over the counter things did not seem to work.

-the comment from the teacher was regarding checking children for lice as there have been cases
-the childminder joked after I mentioned it to her, but said she would be happy to cut it for me (given that it is quite long)

But doing it tomorrow means he's at school again with lice.

Does he not itch? Are they noticeable? What does his hair look like if it can never be combed?

It’s just normal hair, he doesn’t look like a vagrant or anything of the sort. It can be combed but it is just very thick which makes it difficult. Part of the problem is getting him to sit for the time it takes to comb his hair thoroughly so that was my rationale in offering him an ultimatum to get it buzzed by Sarah or sit and let me comb consistently.

He doesn’t really itch a whole lot and isn’t uncomfortable but he has had them for 3 weeks.

Yes I think that is what I’m going to do. I’ve done some research and perhaps a 2-4 all over won’t be too short. I just didn’t want him to be bald :(