Please tell me what Baby Reindeer is all about (spoilers ok, I won't watch it)

[MaggieFS]

It's impossible to avoid hearing about it, but I have no plans to watch it.

Could someone please give me a synopsis rather than just the snippets one hears to try and encourage one to watch it?

Baby Reindeer - Wikipedia

Struggling want to be stand up comedian and full time barman takes pity on a slightly off kilter female customer.

Initially she seems to be of the opinion that he may have a romantic interest in her and he isn't clear in desisting her of this idea.

She ends up stalking him, sitting outside his house, inveigled her way into the property when there's some kind of social group going on in it. Ends up assaulting the barman's Trans girlfriend.

Eventually goes to the police who aren't very interested. Then it's revealed he was the victim of grooming/ drug rape by a much older man who claimed he would help him to break into comedy writing.

Has been in denial over his assault but accepting that he is being stalked also makes him confront the fact that he was assaulted.

Stalker targets barmans parents and eventually goes to prison for her crimes after pleading guilty.

Thanks. Next q - why is it so popular, why is everyone talking about it.

Why don’t you share your views first, from
having done a bit of online searching about it? You know - surely you’ll have read headlines, stories forums etc given your interest?

I didn’t like it much but I think because people like the storyline of the poor man stalked by a mad woman: it’s man as victim which I think people like.

I didn’t pick up on the fact that his girlfriend was trans 🤷🏼‍♀️ I must have missed that bit!

There was a whole storyline of him being ashamed to be seen with her because she was trans.

I don't think people like it, it's not really written to be liked.
It's a true story and the actor and writer is the man it actually happened to. And it's his deeply personal trauma. It's uncomfortable but it's hard to look away if you see what I mean.

I liked it. It was well acted and it was interesting. I liked that the guy was open about how badly he had behaved and what a fuck up he had been and how the situation wasn't straightforward. It felt 'real' . It makes you think of how people who are victims of rape and sexual abuse can feel about themselves and how confusing it can be especially if they blame themselves in some ways.

Netflix made a massive mistake leaving the exact messages in the show that the stalker sent to the guy. That was what made it so easy for people to track down the alleged stalker.

No idea why that parasite Piers Morgan thought it was OK to interview the alleged stalker. It was a massively unkind and unprofessional thing to do and he was brutal in the interview. And, yes, I would say the same if it were a male.

Did you not watch? There were many references to it and it was a major part of the storyline.

OP watch and make your own mind up otherwise you are left making your mind up based on other people’s opinions.

Did you also not watch it..?

It's compelling in part because Donny does things all 'wrong'. He indulges Martha for a long time despite knowing that she's constantly lying about her life. He actively leans into the relationship even when he's already deeply worried about her behaviour. He pokes the bear. It's about the complexity of the relationship - the brokenness in Donny that makes him unwilling or unable to draw lines with Martha, the complexity of society's relationship with people who are "bad victims", and of course the fucked-up-ness of societal response to men who are sexually assaulted.

I thought the writing was kind of clunky at times - too much telling, not enough showing - but as an emotional dynamic it's pretty gripping.

Thanks for the posts. I don't have time for TV (poss could if I didn't waste so long on here!) and I'm not really interested in the content per se, I'm just interested in what it's about because I've heard it talked about on two different radio shows, people at work talking about it, DH is aware of it and then what prompted me to post this morning was yet another thread on mn, this one about the "outed" female doing an interview.

It feels hard to avoid so I was wondering why!

Probably for the same reason you've taken the time to show interest and post a thread about it.

I started watching it, maybe an episode and a half, and haven't gone back to it. I found Gadd quite unlikeable.

I also feel it was irresponsible to claim it was a true story and then for Gadd to then say well this part is true, this isn't etc. He's somewhat back peddled now and says it was "emotionally true". Which means we don't actually know what is and isn't factually true. But the internet being what it is, people have taken it all as fact and run with it.

I suspect the actual truth lies somewhere between the two versions of what did/didn't happen.

My understanding is that is a docu-drama narrated by David Attenborough and it follows the life of a newly born reindeer in Finland as they compete to get the honour of pulling Santa's sleigh. Like a light hearted semi-fictional x-factor. Hope this helps.

It is bloody weird. I have been told by multiple friends NOT to watch it.

It's the best thing Netflix have churned out in years. I thought it was genuinely fantastic.

Yep. All they had to say was that 'the events in this drama series were inspired by real life events'.

'This is a true story' is a very strong statement. Especially when the main character (whether she’s guilty/ mentally ill or 'a bad person') is now being attacked online and has been 'outed'.

The whole thing leaves a bad taste.

This is what my 4.5 year old DD is insisting as she wants to watch it 🙈😂

Why did they call it that?

This I would watch.

That was a nickname the stalker used for her victim. She has since confirmed that she did call him this.

She actively outed herself, but that said, it seems to me remarkably foolish and shortsighted to have used so very much of the truth in the depiction of Martha. Netflix were also clearly unprepared for it to blow up into the monster hit it has.

@EmpressSoleil
I started watching it, maybe an episode and a half, and haven't gone back to it. I found Gadd quite unlikeable.

That was the whole point of the show.
He is honest about what a jerk he was. He actively encouraged his stalker when he knew she had mental health issues, he did heroin, he kept returning to the house of the guy who raped him because he wanted to get a acting/scriptwriting break even though he knew it was stupid. He eventually came to realise that even though he was a jerk it was not his fault he was raped and even though he was a jerk he didn't have to put up with the 'stalker'

It's popular because it's a man who is the victim. If it was a woman victim no one would be interested.

It's the whole "dog bites man is not a headline but man bites dog is".