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Difficult relatives and death

12 replies

usagisan · 09/05/2024 21:46

My mother died recently of cancer, and my father is reluctant to release her ashes.

He's a nasty person. He has left her ashes on the kitchen table in a pointed way because I won't visit, and refuses to deliver them (according to my brother, who has been given a small portion).

He cheated on and belittled her throughout their marriage, at least the last 15 years, and without regard to her terminal diagnosis. She hated him. He said she was exaggerating her pain while she was dying, if that gives a taste of the person he is. He was like this throughout the last years of her life. I have to visit him to have any chance of obtaining some portion of her ashes. He was horrible about the funeral and angry about me choosing popular music to fit the very short ceremony, because he's a snob.

My mother had massive flaws and maybe didn't love me as I'd have liked (openly jealous and didn't protect me from nasty father). She didn't deserve the end she had, with no one but him around. I feel terribly guilty for not being there for her (I wasn't told she was actively dying).

Not sure what my question is. Is it worth putting in so much effort to scatter ashes when my Mum probably wouldn't have cared? Grateful for views from anyone with a similarly difficult family.

OP posts:
saturnspinkhoop · 09/05/2024 21:49

It all sounds incredibly difficult and I really feel for you. I think you need to do what’s right for you.

usagisan · 09/05/2024 21:57

saturnspinkhoop · 09/05/2024 21:49

It all sounds incredibly difficult and I really feel for you. I think you need to do what’s right for you.

Thank you. I wish I was normal.

OP posts:
tsmainsqueeze · 09/05/2024 22:10

I think i would just walk away , to me ashes are not the person anymore they are in your heart and mind and memories, if you feel differently to me what about asking your brother for a tiny amount to have a piece of jewellery made-not for everyone i know.
Free yourself from this man who should have cherished his family and maybe think about talking to someone about how things were with your mom growing up.
I hope you find some peace.

Chaussette · 09/05/2024 22:15

What an incredibly painful thing you are going through @usagisan I am so sorry.
You should probably follow your heart, or that little voice, or whatever it is that you feel and go with it, wether it's do something with your Mother's ashes or not. There's no right or wrong in this kind of situation, it's a matter of perspective. You will know what feels right. Flowers

usagisan · 09/05/2024 22:16

tsmainsqueeze · 09/05/2024 22:10

I think i would just walk away , to me ashes are not the person anymore they are in your heart and mind and memories, if you feel differently to me what about asking your brother for a tiny amount to have a piece of jewellery made-not for everyone i know.
Free yourself from this man who should have cherished his family and maybe think about talking to someone about how things were with your mom growing up.
I hope you find some peace.

My brother scattered what he got without asking me. I don't feel angry about that as he was similarly stressed but am sad he didn't involve me.

I'm thinking about ignoring my father and letting him leave whatever (my mum owned the house) to my brother. I'd like the money but he probably needs it.more.

OP posts:
Chaussette · 09/05/2024 22:20

Your father shouldn't be playing games, and if he is, you have nothing to gain by engaging.

tsmainsqueeze · 09/05/2024 22:23

I am so sorry ,it sounds like your brother is hurting too .
Ignoring sounds good , take care of your own needs for now and look after yourself .

usagisan · 09/05/2024 22:28

Chaussette · 09/05/2024 22:20

Your father shouldn't be playing games, and if he is, you have nothing to gain by engaging.

The issue is, my mum was flawed but normal. I did try(lovely father told her former colleagues that they were not welcome after I'd paid for a buffet and said I wanted them there).They didn't come.

OP posts:
usagisan · 09/05/2024 22:31

people are already judging me for cutting him off

OP posts:
Chaussette · 09/05/2024 22:45

People who judge are not great to have around. Look, you grew up in your family, you can make your own informed decisions, you don't owe anyone to behave in a certain way. Look after yourself @usagisan

usagisan · 09/05/2024 22:49

My own half siblings (older, alive mother, older than me) think I should be nicer because he's sad. I'm sad too.

OP posts:
saturnspinkhoop · 09/05/2024 22:56

usagisan · 09/05/2024 22:31

people are already judging me for cutting him off

There are a lot of very stupid and judgey people out there. They don’t have a clue what went on. You do. They aren’t worth worrying about.

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