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Original poster

I really hope I’ve not spread gossip.. do you think I have?

20 replies

eeekmessedup1 · 08/05/2024 19:30

DH works in a secondary school and I’ve accidentally spread some details he shared with me, with one of my colleagues.

He told me in passing something about a student who was taken unwell after a sports injury in PE, badly broken bone. I told my colleague without thinking. Her daughter also attends the same school, albeit it’s a huge school (thousands of kids) and they’re in different year groups. My colleague isn’t a gossip. I doubt she’d tell her daughter. Her daughter probably wouldn’t even care - like I say, different year group and daughter doing exams at the moment so hopefully has bigger fish to fry.

I’m probably overthinking big time but I’m worried she’s going to tell her daughter, who will spread the news to her friends, it’ll somehow come back that it’s come through me (DH) and I don’t want him in trouble with senior leadership team, which he surely would do for spreading personal info.

Please tell me I’m being absolutely stupid and overthinking - and yes, I won’t do it again, don’t know what I was thinking. I am spiralling as I have anxiety that is particularly bad at the moment.

OP posts:
ImNotThereAmI · 08/05/2024 19:33

Won’t the be all over the school anyway? A pupil badly breaking a bone during pe would surely be talked about amongst pupils

Original poster
eeekmessedup1 · 08/05/2024 19:34

ImNotThereAmI · 08/05/2024 19:33

Won’t the be all over the school anyway? A pupil badly breaking a bone during pe would surely be talked about amongst pupils

Yeah he said other pupils definitely saw. Just irrationally worried that my colleagues daughter specifically will say, if asked, well Mum told me, cos her colleague’s husband is Mr name

OP posts:
Comedycook · 08/05/2024 19:35

I have terrible anxiety...I would be the same...but logically surely this info would become common knowledge soon enough anyway

Chelentol · 08/05/2024 19:37

the daughter is not likely to tell anyone, it’s fairly boring for her, someone from a different year has a broken bone (which everyone in that year will know anyway). Destress you’re panicking about something that won’t happen!

Original poster
eeekmessedup1 · 08/05/2024 19:37

Comedycook · 08/05/2024 19:35

I have terrible anxiety...I would be the same...but logically surely this info would become common knowledge soon enough anyway

I think it would be for sure. The issue in my mind is if, my colleague’s daughter is overheard by staff or they say ‘Megan’ told us… and if she is asked she will say, her mum told her, and they found out because of my DH. I dunno.

OP posts:
PossumintheHouse · 08/05/2024 19:37

If several other people saw, you've got nothing to worry about.
Even if she told her daughter, and her daughter shared it, she's hardly likely to say mum's colleague X told my mum. And I doubt your colleague would even tell her daughter the source. But if she did, she's hardly going to focus on that part of the story, is she?

Heatedblanky · 08/05/2024 19:38

The fact that someone broke a bone is not gossip, surely, it’s a fact that many people already know. There’s no secret to keep here.

Greywitch2 · 08/05/2024 19:47

It depends on what you passed on to your colleague, to be honest.

If it was, 'Goodness, Dh told me that one of his student, Megan Jones, broke their foot in PE today. Poor kid', then that is fine.

But you say he told you in passing, 'something about a student who was taken unwell'. If you've said, 'Goodness, DH told me today that Megan Jones broke her foot in PE, and was sobbing on his shoulder, confessing she is suffering from an eating disorder,' then yes. He'll be in deep shit if that is passed on to people.

Original poster
eeekmessedup1 · 08/05/2024 19:56

Greywitch2 · 08/05/2024 19:47

It depends on what you passed on to your colleague, to be honest.

If it was, 'Goodness, Dh told me that one of his student, Megan Jones, broke their foot in PE today. Poor kid', then that is fine.

But you say he told you in passing, 'something about a student who was taken unwell'. If you've said, 'Goodness, DH told me today that Megan Jones broke her foot in PE, and was sobbing on his shoulder, confessing she is suffering from an eating disorder,' then yes. He'll be in deep shit if that is passed on to people.

No, I said a 14 year old and exactly what had happened to her but not her name or anything else identifying, apart from the injury.

OP posts:
Original poster
eeekmessedup1 · 08/05/2024 19:59

Heatedblanky · 08/05/2024 19:38

The fact that someone broke a bone is not gossip, surely, it’s a fact that many people already know. There’s no secret to keep here.

I hope so. I haven’t told DH I told my colleague. Instead I’ve tried to subtly ask more about it. Turns out 4 staff were gathered round to help and maybe 2 kids saw it. That was it.

OP posts:
Original poster
eeekmessedup1 · 08/05/2024 20:08

PossumintheHouse · 08/05/2024 19:37

If several other people saw, you've got nothing to worry about.
Even if she told her daughter, and her daughter shared it, she's hardly likely to say mum's colleague X told my mum. And I doubt your colleague would even tell her daughter the source. But if she did, she's hardly going to focus on that part of the story, is she?

Thank you. I hope you’re right.

OP posts:
Original poster
eeekmessedup1 · 08/05/2024 20:51

As an update, I was worrying so much I text my colleague and asked her not to say anything. She said, of course, she’d forgotten all about it and not to worry!
For some reason now I think it was silly to reminder her as surely she is more likely to say something now? Agh

OP posts:
DumpedByText · 08/05/2024 20:55

I work in a high school and that kind of news would be spread throughout school very fast.

I wouldn't worry at all, you've only stated a fact as well.

Original poster
eeekmessedup1 · 08/05/2024 21:04

DumpedByText · 08/05/2024 20:55

I work in a high school and that kind of news would be spread throughout school very fast.

I wouldn't worry at all, you've only stated a fact as well.

Unlikely to ever be traced back, too, right?

Supposing colleagues daughter says anything. It’ll be to a friend at break; right? ’A girl in Y10 broke a bone’ (not her real name obv). ‘Did she?’ End of conversation. It could have come from anyone - how would they prove DH? Just so worried. I think I’ve got myself into such a tizzy over it it’s not even very rational.

OP posts:
Damnyourheadshoulderskneesandtoes · 08/05/2024 21:08

Sharing anonymised info is ok, your husband won't get in trouble for saying 'one of my year 8s broke their foot today.' Stop worrying about nothing!

historygeek · 08/05/2024 21:27

You've hardly broken GDPR by saying that a child has broken a bone. I'm a teacher and wouldn't bat an eyelid at this info being shared, even if it did get out that it came from your DH.

You seem very anxious about this. Do you think your DH would be cross that you told colleague?

Greywitch2 · 09/05/2024 12:34

Ok, OP so you are fine. Stop worrying now. You've done nothing wrong.

pimplebum · 21/10/2024 22:03

You haven’t shared a name or personal medical information or made a data breach

you need to stop worrying
most people don’t reveal their sources , I always just say “ I heard that …” “ from a friend “ why would his bosses give a shit that you told a colleague a kid broke their arm? unless it was a crime ie a parent or another child did the breaking, then it’s no big event and will be old news by break tomorrow

Sidebeforeself · 21/10/2024 22:06

@pimplebum It is old news! Check the date on the thread!

PollyLimb · 21/10/2024 22:15

This is not private or confidential information but is in the public domain and will have spread through the year group to families and into the community. Fret not OP. Relax.

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