Not posting in AIBU because I don't want to get slaughtered.
I know we all have our stuff to deal with, and there are people who have it much worse than me, that's for sure.
However, I'm feeling low about a couple of things ATM and looking at how to feel more positive.
My only surviving grandparent has dementia, and I've previously worked as a care assistant so I know exactly what that looks like. I feel like we've already 'lost' her in a sense.
I can't date the person I like, who is also my friend, because he didn't want to get involved whilst we work together. I respected it and never mentioned it again, it was a while ago but I'm still not over it.
It's painful seeing him at work, even though I try to hide it, so I'm looking for a new job. I do want to progress anwyay, but it will make things easier with him.
I've had rubbish luck with apps so far, lot of ghosting and flakes. I'm 33, which I think is a tricky age for dating. I am trying to date, but it's a matter of luck, and timing. You're made to feel like there's something wrong with you if you aren't partnered up by this age. It's really not all it's cracked up to be, I know that, but I just feel pressure.
I'm suffering with my mental health and have done for a while.
I've never been lucky in love, I've never been proposed to or anything close, I've been messed around by so many men.
I know it all sounds a bit woe is me, but I don't know where to start from here.
Would appreciate any advice whatsoever.
I do have hobbies, I have purpose, and I keep busy. I can't afford therapy ATM sadly.