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Original poster

Garden party or soft play for kid’s birthday party?

20 replies

Traceyallshot · 05/05/2024 00:50

My child will be 3 in a few months and until now we’ve just had a tiny birthday celebration with immediate family. This year we were going to have a party and I have narrowed down the options for it to be either a local soft play or we will hire a bouncy castle and have it in the garden. The soft play seemed expensive at first but it would be around £120-£150 and that would save us dealing with providing any food etc. Like most soft plays, you just get the use of the party room and the rest of the soft play is still open to the public so it is chaos. The issue is, I think if we were to have the soft play option we could basically just invite the kids and babies we know and their parent, along with our immediate family. I don’t think we’d invite our aunts and uncles etc.

However if we have something in the garden I think it could grow arms and legs. I feel like I’d have to invite all the kids we know plus probably our aunts/uncles/cousins, friends without kids etc. We’d then spend the time probably stressing, having paid a fortune for food and drink for adults and kids and having to run about making sure everyone has a drink etc. What is the etiquette for these things? Do you invite friends without kids? Would people be miffed not to be invited? I’ve been at kids birthday’s before pre-kids and it was a really awkward affair as we hung about a hall having to watch a bunch of random kids on a bouncy castle. I don’t want to offend anyone but also don’t want people to feel they have to come along when really they aren’t going to be interested

OP posts:
HAF1119 · 05/05/2024 03:23

Whichever suits your budget and what you want to get out of the party. I did 2nd and 3rd birthdays as garden parties then older ones away from house - but that was partly because after the 3rd I was put off. Having the mess on my turf, in particular the food mess and the fact kids run in and out the house - you can't watch them all so a few toys got broken and many more were just scattered everywhere, made me not want to do it again. But I've been to other childrens parties in garden/house and the parents have been laid back, had a few drinks and seemed to have a ball. That's just not me - so it didn't suit me!

Also bear in mind with garden parties that if it rains the party moves into the house and it can be a bit chaotic!

pambeesleyhalpert · 05/05/2024 03:51

Deff have it in a soft play. I couldn't be dealing with all the prep for a garden party and the mammoth tidy up after

GetUpStandUp4 · 05/05/2024 04:00

I'm imagining the crying when kids bump into eachother on a bouncy castle. my 3yo dd hates bouncy castles unle4ss their empty. she'd avoid if there were energetic kids on it. stick to softplay.

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DuploTrain · 05/05/2024 04:28

Do you have space inside your house for everyone if it rains?

I’d do softplay personally.. it’s great to just turn up, have the party and go home. We’ve just had our 3yo party at a play cafe, which was great.. much smaller than a normal softplay so you hire the whole venue. Anything like that near you?

WaitingfortheTardis · 05/05/2024 05:07

That's a bargain for a soft play party! Around here it is about £300, though that is for exclusive use. We tend to go with separate do for the children's party and the family get together is a quieter affair at home with a small buffet, tea and cake etc.

PeterJohnson · 05/05/2024 06:20

I never did a family and friends birthday party for the DC. My IL's would have no interest watching other over-excited kids!
I'd do a friends with kids at soft play party and then separately a meal at home with immediate family (MIL, FIL, BIL & SIL)

crockofshite · 05/05/2024 06:49

On the actual birthday have an informal tea and cake at home for family.

On another day have soft play for the kids only.

I agree that nobody wants to spend a couple of hours watching over excited 3 yo bouncing off each other 🥺

UnderGreenGrass · 05/05/2024 06:52

Honestly? I hate softplay parties. Garden parties are much nicer.

TheWayTheLightFalls · 05/05/2024 07:02

We always do bouncy castles in the garden. Love it - especially no stress over timings/having to be out of the venue at a certain time. We limit it to six/seven kids (that is plenty for a child your age) and it’s lovely and relaxed.

CatchTheBalloon · 05/05/2024 07:58

soft play and no need to invite people without kids, would be my worst nightmare 😏😣

longdistanceclaraclara · 05/05/2024 08:28

Garden party. The idea of going to a soft play without kids is awful.

therakile · 05/05/2024 08:29

I wouldn't do a garden party or anything else outdoors, it would be just my luck for it to fall on a rainy day. I'd find it very stressful to have lots of people in my home too. I prefer to hire halls and have bouncy castle & infltable slide- then you have sole use.

Ohtoberetired · 05/05/2024 08:35

Definitely soft play. If it rains you would need to move the party to inside your house and that wouldn’t be pleasant.

mitogoshi · 05/05/2024 08:55

At 3 I'd have 2 or 3 friends from nursery (plus parents) or just friends that have similar aged children and your family at your home, it's really not a big deal. Perhaps for 4 look at soft play or a hall party but it's too much at 3

Original poster
Traceyallshot · 05/05/2024 08:58

DuploTrain · 05/05/2024 04:28

Do you have space inside your house for everyone if it rains?

I’d do softplay personally.. it’s great to just turn up, have the party and go home. We’ve just had our 3yo party at a play cafe, which was great.. much smaller than a normal softplay so you hire the whole venue. Anything like that near you?

There is actually one like that and you either book a normal party or there is the option of hiring the whole place. Need to check how much that is but I did think that might be less noise and chaotic

OP posts:
Original poster
Traceyallshot · 05/05/2024 08:58

mitogoshi · 05/05/2024 08:55

At 3 I'd have 2 or 3 friends from nursery (plus parents) or just friends that have similar aged children and your family at your home, it's really not a big deal. Perhaps for 4 look at soft play or a hall party but it's too much at 3

That was also what I thought, maybe a soft play party is more when they have lots of nursery friends age 4

OP posts:
Original poster
Traceyallshot · 05/05/2024 09:01

TheWayTheLightFalls · 05/05/2024 07:02

We always do bouncy castles in the garden. Love it - especially no stress over timings/having to be out of the venue at a certain time. We limit it to six/seven kids (that is plenty for a child your age) and it’s lovely and relaxed.

I think it does seem more like it’s your child’s actual birthday doing that and sounds lovely especially on a nice day. I went to a soft play party recently and it felt very impersonal, like it was just a conveyor belt of kids parties getting a shot in the room

OP posts:
disneyparis · 05/05/2024 09:04

Just keep it low key at 3, you have loads of years of birthday parties to come. I'd just do a day out and save birthday party til at school, but if you want to do a party keep it small. The children get really overwhelmed at that age. Also I wouldn't be inviting extended family or friends without kids, no one really wants to spend their weekend at at a 3 year old party unless their child is going, and even then it can be a nightmare !

NerrSnerr · 05/05/2024 09:08

When our kids were little we did parties at home or village halls with bouncy castles but the costs always ended up high by the time you've paid for the castle, food, activities etc. We do soft play (other activities now they're older) as it's less stress and the party is done for you.

I wouldn't invite any child free people to either party, no one wants to go to a party with 20 3 year olds running around if you don't have kids!

OneWorldly4 · 05/05/2024 10:09

disneyparis · 05/05/2024 09:04

Just keep it low key at 3, you have loads of years of birthday parties to come. I'd just do a day out and save birthday party til at school, but if you want to do a party keep it small. The children get really overwhelmed at that age. Also I wouldn't be inviting extended family or friends without kids, no one really wants to spend their weekend at at a 3 year old party unless their child is going, and even then it can be a nightmare !

Agree with this.

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