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Original poster

Is this a weird or nice thing to do?

27 replies

LookItsMeAgain · 04/05/2024 13:13

I came into a small sum of money recently (think about €200) and it's coming up to my birthday soon so I was thinking of sending my siblings a bunch of flowers that should arrive on my birthday so that they can celebrate the day with me (there is a distance thing with these siblings) so as I thought I hadn't had this money up to recently, it's 'extra' money if you will.
Would you think that would be a weird thing to do or a nice thing to do?

OP posts:
Kangarude · 04/05/2024 13:17

I would think it very strange to send my siblings flowers on my birthday. It could be seen as a bit passive aggressive if they don’t buy you a birthday gift. Treat yourself

R41nb0wR0se · 04/05/2024 13:20

I'd be tempted to send cake so they can celebrate with you - I sent MIL a cream tea hamper for mother's day, which was inexpensive and greatly appreciated!

lurkingfromhome · 04/05/2024 13:20

I think buying them the flowers as a treat is a perfectly lovely thing to do, but absolutely do not do it on your own birthday. It definitely comes across as making some sort of point (and what that point precisely is depends rather on the relationship you have with them, but it won't be good).

thecatsthecats · 04/05/2024 13:24

I would think a bottle of something was more of a "celebrate with me" gesture, not flowers. You haven't died

AuntMarch · 04/05/2024 13:27

Something to eat or drink during a group zoom call, I get. Flowers is weird.

But I don't like flowers much anyway. "Here, go to some effort to trim and arrange these plants that will look nice for a couple of days before they die". Don't get it! But especially not in a "hey remember it's my birthday" way.

Revelatio · 04/05/2024 13:31

Flowers is odd, at least send them on their birthday not yours!! Or get them something later in the year if you see something you think they’d like. It seems a bit self indulgent to send someone flowers/cake/drink on your own birthday!

mynameiscalypso · 04/05/2024 13:33

I would send yourself some flowers!

BarrelOfOtters · 04/05/2024 13:34

Bit weird but you know your family dynamics best.

Devastated999 · 04/05/2024 13:37

R41nb0wR0se · 04/05/2024 13:20

I'd be tempted to send cake so they can celebrate with you - I sent MIL a cream tea hamper for mother's day, which was inexpensive and greatly appreciated!

Ooh, a cream tea is a great idea. Could you recommend the company you used?

R41nb0wR0se · 04/05/2024 13:48

Devastated999 · 04/05/2024 13:37

Ooh, a cream tea is a great idea. Could you recommend the company you used?

Show quote history

It was Devon Heaven

AsYouMightBe · 04/05/2024 14:00

Kangarude · 04/05/2024 13:17

I would think it very strange to send my siblings flowers on my birthday. It could be seen as a bit passive aggressive if they don’t buy you a birthday gift. Treat yourself

Yes, that definitely one available reading of it as an action. Up yourself something with the money!

Comedycook · 04/05/2024 14:04

No... don't do this. It sounds like a waste of money.

ginasevern · 04/05/2024 14:06

You aren't going to have much change left out of your £200 winnings/inheritance.

Sasqwatch · 04/05/2024 14:07

R41nb0wR0se · 04/05/2024 13:20

I'd be tempted to send cake so they can celebrate with you - I sent MIL a cream tea hamper for mother's day, which was inexpensive and greatly appreciated!

Great idea, flowers not so much.

IceCreamWoes · 04/05/2024 14:08

Don't send presents to other people on your birthday when money is clearly so tight for you

longdistanceclaraclara · 04/05/2024 14:09

Odd, spend the money on you, it's your birthday!

AtrociousCircumstance · 04/05/2024 14:11

It’s a bit weird, and as a PP says it could read as passive aggressive!

Get yourself something nice 😊

Peclet · 04/05/2024 14:11

It reads as passive aggressive. Like you’re reminding them it’s your birthday.

DrJoanAllenby · 04/05/2024 14:11

It's odd in this day and age when the internet can unite you altogether at the same!

Flowers will wither and die and you need the money.

thedendrochronologist · 04/05/2024 14:53

Save the money until you see them and buy them dinner/lunch/tea

Or

Buy yourself a treat.

Or buy me some AirPod pros.

thedendrochronologist · 04/05/2024 14:54

I was being lighthearted- feel I must say this now!

I don't want you to buy me AirPod pros but if I and a spare 200 that is what I would get!

JennyfromtheBlok · 04/05/2024 14:55

Yes it is weird.
I would feel awkward if my sister bought me flowers on her birthday

ManchesterBeatrice · 04/05/2024 14:58

Kangarude · 04/05/2024 13:17

I would think it very strange to send my siblings flowers on my birthday. It could be seen as a bit passive aggressive if they don’t buy you a birthday gift. Treat yourself

I agree with this.

wherewegoing · 04/05/2024 16:12

Very passive aggressive I’d say.

Why would they even need or want flowers to celebrate someone elses birthday?

Curtainpoles · 04/05/2024 16:32

I think it's odd. As per PP a bottle of wine / nice cake etc that they could drink / eat with you over zoom might be nice. But I'd find it very odd to be bought flowers for someone else's birthday and it does feel passive aggressive.