How do you ask for help.

[Pinkglitterblack]

I suppose I am at my wits end and I really don't know what I want from this and I'm trying not to out myself as I will feel even more foolish.
I am a single parent to 1 DC, dad is useless but gives maintenence, I work 30 hours a week, parents are elderly, no other family and no friends. I feel burnt out. I can't keep up, I can't cope. DC has learning difficulties and needs a lot of help. I feel like I am meeting myself coming backwards and I don't think I can carry on.
DC won't sleep, I am beyond tired and I am struggling to cope. I manage everything, yet I haven't even got time to eat some days and some of the days I don't have anything to eat as I can't afford it. I am already claiming all I can it's just I am spending everything on DC who is becoming more and more spiteful and violent.
They hit me, they call me embarrassing and generally treat me like a servant. YR 6 so they should be able to do a few more things like dress themselves but they stand there and scream if I tell them. I have asked school and they just say there is no behaviour at school so not their problem. I tried the GP and they said try school. CAHMs is a 2 year wait.
Due to DC's condition, they have no friends so there are no parties or playdates despite me giving playdates, parties and lifts where needed. I always help out if I can and yet when I am struggling, no one seems to be able to give me a little bit of support.
I can't afford to pay so who can I ask?

Oh goodness, OP. I'm so sorry you are feeling this way, it sounds tough.

Are the any counselling services in your area that offer free or heavily reduced sessions? If so, talking to someone about the all of this could help.

If this is tipping over to affect your mental health then maybe a return to the GP to discuss you rather than your child?

I used to be a teacher and now work in mental health, I'll have a think

Firstly, I would stop helping other people out that aren't returning the favour. That will take a load off.

Ask for more help from your GP. Sadly, waiting lists are huge for mental health services. Ask your GP for melatonin for your non sleeping child. Completely safe and might help reduce the nights you are awake with him/her. Sleep deprivation is the worst, so hard to function after.

Does the father have any involvement in the children's lives? Can he have the kids every other weekend or an arrangement be made. Can the grandparents help at all, even a little?

Can you work from home? Either FT/PT? Even a day a week might help, but depends on what you do.

Support groups. Have a look on google and see if there are any in your area. Ask the school if they know of any. Check FB too.

Good luck X

I've just sat down with dinner. The father has then 2 hours a week, overnight once a month. Grandparents are older and very quick to judge my parenting skills. They will look after them if I am totally stuck but I tend not to bother as I have to beg, then they make a big mess so I have extra cleaning and tidying to do.
I already work from home permanently so there is that.
I have phoned cahms re melatonin, help with behaviour and the gp for me. Phone counselling might be good as I don't have time for f2f appointments.
No more favours. Hopefully I'll feel better in the morning.

I'm thinking the father can do way more, if you agree and think the children's needs would be met.

Call social services and tell them you are not coping and need respite referrals before you burn out completely. Have you told your employer about all you are having to deal with?
Are there any charities in your area that offer respite care?
Why does Dad have them so little? Can he up the one night to two nights or even a full weekend where he returns them to school so you get a longer break?