What would you do?

[wondabar]

Seeing a sister in law soon at a funeral. Since I last saw her I have discovered that she asked her parents to take her sister's children out of her parents' will. Her sister passed away a few years ago and the two sisters were close. However my SIL went through a divorce and clearly thought that she and her family were entitled to a bit more of the will. She is very nice to her late sister's children and it sickens me that she asked for them to be removed from the will. Her late sister's husband has remarried so the majority of his estate will go to his new wife leaving the children with very little. I really want to tell her that what she has done is wrong but my husband doesn't want me to approach the subject with her. I used to get on very well with her but this has completely changed my opinion on her as I think what she has done is mean and selfish. Do I tell her how I feel?

Since I last saw her I have discovered that she asked her parents to take her sister's children out of her parents' will

The key point here is that she requested that her parents change their will(s), but they are under no obligation to honor her request. This is between your SIL and her parents.

This just isn't your business and "telling her how you feel" is going to cause problems. Besides, is this just gossip? It's an odd thing for you to know since it seems like a private matter.

I agree with your husband; stay out of it.

I know as my DH told me that she had requested and the will was changed.

Then that's on her parents. They were under no obligation to change their will and essentially disinherit their own grandchildren. But in the end it is their money to do with as they wish and you have no say in the matter.

I get where you are coming from and I find this pretty appalling myself, but it isn't your business and I can guarantee you'll be starting WWIII if you start complaining about this.

These are your husband's parents, correct? Follow his lead and do not get in the middle of this.

And how did you 'discover' this (perhaps dis) information?

I would really want to tell her how awful I thought she was. Realistically, I wouldn't say anything. Not my business and a funeral is definitely not the place to bring up family drama.

Did you tell the parents they were horrible people for disinheriting the grandchildren or do you still see them and keep your mouth shut? They are the people who have done something wrong.