I worked in Children's Services for 10 years. We had strict codes of conduct around boundaries with the families we worked with.
I left in 2014 so I appreciate that times have changed, but I'm concerned about what I see is inappropriate behaviour crossing boundaries with a friend, who recently requested and is receiving some support. It's not at child protection level or child in need, or I'd not be posting. She wanted support for her middle son, who is experiencing serious depression. She does have CAMHS involvement etc , as many services as she can.
My friend escaped a relationship in which there was coercive control, but the other parent still has PR. He also lives in another country. He promised he would move back to the UK with my friend and buy a house close by to help bring up the children, but changed his mind. My friend has had to go through courts to get the money from him she is entitled to as he dragged his feet on every penny despite being extremely well off. There are so many other stories - I know many MNers will have had similar experiences.
The support worker has created a WhatsApp chat with all 3 of them in it. I was shown this yesterday. Coercive ex partner often cracks jokes in the chat to which support worker adds laugh emojis. Support worker also joins in with ex -partner in patronising my friend. I was absolutely appalled.
My friend is taking this higher as it's been extremely triggering for her. Ex - partner is very good at talking the talk in front of services whereas my friend has done 95% of the child rearing.
Is this the now norm? Support worker has guilt-tripped my friend into various uncomfortable situations. I have been looking at codes of conduct and they don't seem all that different to in my time. I don't think this person knows the level of damage she has done and really needs some training.
Wondered if others had experienced similar and could help me to advise my friend? She's been through so much, when I saw the WhatsApp chat I was furious.