Should I be *that* parent?

[Footiemom]

I honestly can’t tell if I would be unreasonable to do this or not so please give me honest opinions. My two sons attend football training every week, there is usually only around 10 children at it. It’s been running since September. All boys are between 6-8.
every week there is a star of the week award. The trainer never keeps track of who has got the certificate before, sometimes forgets to do it, other times gives it to a child who has got it before and sometimes gives it to a new child whose just had their first week. It’s always at random. Even when she gives it to the same child again the child will say “I got it before” and the coach seems surprised and says “everyone will get star of the week at some stage”
My 2 have yet to get it. They have not missed any weeks training and try their best and are feeling very disheartened by it.
would I be wrong to have a word with the coach? I’m not even sure what I would say but I feel annoyed at the complete lack of system to it and that my kids are left out.

Not wrong to mention it.

No, don't. I'm sure they'll get it eventually.

I'd have a chat, the point of doing it is negated if it ends up acting as a demotivator if the reward/recognition they use is done without a little care and attention.
It shouldn't be completely arbitrary and two good kids shouldn't never get it.
the personally of the coach might mean the chat has to be handled carefully if they are likely to get defensive, so a can i offer some feedback/observation type approach might be best.

Yes the coach isn’t great to be honest. Doesn’t take time to know the kids names etc despite it being a small consistent group.
not sure how well it would go down but every week my kids get their hopes up and just never get it. And it honestly doesn’t seem to even be to recognise a good player. The kids say “is there going to be player of the week” to remind the coach and he then just looks ans says yes you and points to someone at random

I’d just say ‘hi coach, not sure how star of the week gets done and I know you’ve said everyone will get it but could my two haven’t yet and seeing others getting it a few times is causing tears. Could you possibly do them sometime soon?’

My son went a whole year at school without a 'special mention' he wasn't naughty or exceptional just coasted but never got a special mention in s a whole year. He noticed I was so pissed off I emailed the head in the last week is school.

He came home that week saying Mum I got a special mention from the head teacher!! He was delighted and I was happy for him but I still think the teacher was rubbish for not logging it you have to share the love

They've been waiting patiently, but the risk is you’ll get to the end of the season and still be in the same position. Either you can make a total joke of it with your kids and gently take the piss out of the randomness of the awards - you could have a ‘guess who’s going to get it this week’ competition between the three of you! Or you can mention it to the coach - ‘I’m sorry to bother you, but dc1 and dc2 have been asking me how they can get star of the week, as some players seem to have had it several times already.’

Sounds a bit crap and completely counter productive!

What about something like
'hey coach, whatever your name is, your heart doesn't seem to be in it to make player of the week actually count for something so why don't you just drop it, cos this hit and miss approach is just demotivating a couple of good kids who think you actually put some thought into it and therefore think they're lacking something when they've never got it'

Haha. Well you can't say that can you, truth though.
Diplomatic version? 😬😁

Yeah yanbu, in schools the teachers write a list of names and tick them off to avoid this happening..it doesn't take that much effort!

I'd be pretty pissed off at the coach to be honest. Kids notice stuff like this and it can really harm their self esteem.

I'll never forget taking my daughter to a party when she was about four. There was an entertainer who was running games and giving out lots of little prizes fairly randomly. Some kids left with three or four prizes. My daughter left empty handed and in tears.

If your job is working with children and you upset them, when they've done nothing wrong and aren't overreacting, then you are bad at your job. I do work with children though older ones) and I'm very conscious of stuff like this. They are very fragile emotionally.

I think would have a quiet word. Or possibly look into a different club.

I'd find a better club, it sounds poorly organised.

You’re not wrong OP. Poorly organised clubs are a pain in the arse! It makes such a difference when the coaches are good and passionate about what they do. I’d definitely say something, hopefully it will encourage the club to put a system in place going forward.