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Original poster

Are tipping expectations increasing in the UK

55 replies

opticoner · 14/04/2024 15:07

It was my birthday on Friday and yesterday DH took me out to lunch at a local restaurant I like to celebrate. We don't eat out a lot so it was a nice treat. The bill came to just about £44. Dh paid cash and gave the waitress 3 x £20's so £60. She took it off and we got ready to leave while waiting for her to come back with our change. However she never came back and we had to flag down another waiter who went to check and then out waitress came over, my husband then asked about his change and she said "oh so do you want your change?" My husband said yes of course and so she went off to get it and brought the £16 ish back to us dumped it on the table and walked off. We had been planning to leave her a £5 tip but due to how presumptuous she was Dh didn't leave anything.

Isn't it a bit rude to expect to keep all the change in this instance? I have heard that tipping expectations are increasing so that where 10% was once seen as a good tip it is now seen as bare minimum and I saw that some places are adding in other charges like a "branding charge" ( I don't know what that is) which is in addition to any tips or service charges.

Perhaps they thought we were being a bit stingy in our ordering as we only ordered one soft drink each and then a starter and a main but we didn't sit for ages hogging a table we were in and out within an hour.

We did go to a noodle place last year where they added a 15% service charge even though service was actually very limited, it wasn't bad as such but it was very basic. I understand that hospitality struggles but I'd prefer if tipping either wasn't a thing at all and places just charged enough to cover their costs and a fair wage for their staff and then I could see before booking if I could afford to eat there or not. Either that or keep tipping to the 10% it has always been.

OP posts:
PhilosophicalCheeseSandwich · 14/04/2024 16:02

FusilliNom · 14/04/2024 15:52

Paying in cash is a faff these days though. She'd have had to bring your cash back only for you to leave some of it. How is she going to know what sort of change to give to you. Much better to say eg "just £4 change please keep the rest as a tip"

You give £16 change, there's no tricky maths or mind reading required. You'd hope for the fiver as a tip. But knowing you're earning a standard hourly rate, the same as anyone on NNW, you wouldn't assume it was yours unless you'd really put in the graft to do more than you're expected to.

OolongTeaDrinker · 14/04/2024 16:10

I’ve never been to a restaurant where the change is kept unless you specify otherwise. Usually the wait staff would bring the change and then the customer would leave as much of as little of it as they wanted as a tip. £16 tip on a £44 bill would be ridiculous unless the person serving had done the Heimlich manoeuvre on a member of your party and saved their life!

Anewuser · 14/04/2024 16:24

That’s really cheeky. Who tips that much for a lunch?

I’m so confused with tipping. I occasionally (3 times a year) go to the hairdressers and always feel the pressure to tip. When we have a takeaway delivered, it feels like the driver faffs around for a tip, the shop is only at the end of the road and delivery is charged.

I very rarely eat out but had a pub lunch recently. When it came to paying, I started getting cash out and one of my party asked the waiter if they take cash, he said they did but don’t give any change. I’ve never heard of that before. Since when?

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thedendrochronologist · 14/04/2024 16:30

I don't tip As much as I used- I used to do 10%, but now more like £1 per person dining in an everyday sort of place. More if it was slightly fancy and had excellent service. This is because NMW in UK.

Keep £16 is ridiculous

easylikeasundaymorn · 14/04/2024 16:31

I agree it seems more of an expectation. Lots of places automatically including a service charge whereas pre covid it was usually for large groups or something.
I went to a boardgames cafe the other day that didn't allow you to pay at the bar, you had to have a tab and added 10% service charge, literally for bringing a few drinks to the table!

Guineaguineaguinea · 14/04/2024 17:31

Expectations are definitely increasing. And as they increase the service declines. We had a 12.5% service charge added a few weeks ago. We had to ask to order drinks, food and desert. We weren’t asked if we wanted more drinks and our plates weren’t cleared quickly. Central London. I asked for it to be removed which they did without fuss. Service has been awful everywhere since Covid imo. It’s so slow.

LuckysDadsHat · 14/04/2024 17:37

I no longer tip delivery drivers as they all charge delivery now so I'm not paying again on top!

Restaurants it depends on the service. Good to great service they will get a top usually 10% ish. Poor to average or if they didn't actually have to serve us a lot then I don't bother.

Trixiefirecracker · 14/04/2024 17:43

I tip. Unless service is shocking. I was a waitress and they earn shit wages and the tips are routinely shared between everyone do works out minimal but I often relied on my tips to make my job a living wage. I would tip a hairdresser too and a taxi driver etc. I think if you get good service and you like the food it’s nice to be appreciated. I did notice the ones who had the £100 plus meals never usually tipped but the little regular who had a coffee and a croissant would often leave almost as much as their whole meal was worth. Think it says a lot about a person.

rookiemere · 14/04/2024 17:52

In the UK it's always been 10% for as long as I have had meals out ( in 50s). But recently I've noticed places with a pre added tip - particularly in London - have changed it to 12.5% which is annoying as the service certainly hasn't improved by 2.5%.

Hoplolly · 14/04/2024 18:25

rookiemere · 14/04/2024 17:52

In the UK it's always been 10% for as long as I have had meals out ( in 50s). But recently I've noticed places with a pre added tip - particularly in London - have changed it to 12.5% which is annoying as the service certainly hasn't improved by 2.5%.

I've noticed that a lot too (outside of London)

Jeezitneverends · 14/04/2024 18:31

I don’t tip for standard service these days, if someone goes out of their way and it’s exceptional then 10% at most, but minimum wage is a thing…service wages were low due to the expectation of tips, but not the case now. As others have said, there are many other min wage jobs with no expectation of tips such as carers etc

TunaCrunchy · 14/04/2024 18:32

I’ve lowered my tips since eating out prices have gone up. If the service is automatically added at 12.5% or whatever then I just pay it. If it isn’t added onto the bill I pay a bit less. Yesterday a bill came to £108 and I gave a fiver. The other day my share 9f a bill was £27 so I gave £3.

Changingplace · 14/04/2024 18:43

FusilliNom · 14/04/2024 15:52

Paying in cash is a faff these days though. She'd have had to bring your cash back only for you to leave some of it. How is she going to know what sort of change to give to you. Much better to say eg "just £4 change please keep the rest as a tip"

If paying in cash is too much bother for staff then they’d be even more presumptuous to think they’d get such a huge tip.

JamSandle · 14/04/2024 18:44

I dont tip.

TinyYellow · 14/04/2024 18:48

That was very rude of that waitress, total cheeky fucker. Your husband did the right thing leaving nothing after that.

usernother · 14/04/2024 18:57

I don't care if it is. I do tip but I'll tip what I want to and won't bow to pressure to tip any greater amount than I normally would.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 14/04/2024 20:03

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 14/04/2024 15:31

Tips were rarely 15-20% in the UK, 10% or therabouts is more common.

Show quote history

20% is usual in the US AFAIK.

ThePure · 14/04/2024 20:28

Recently at a restaurant for DHs birthday (not very posh just a chain Italian place) 15% service charge was added but then when paying by card we still had that really awkward 'do you want to add 5,10, 15 or 20%' question. I had to actually select 'other' to be able to put 0. I didn't see why I should pay twice and these messages on the card machine I find very pushy. It's always an option on the card machine now. I've had it at the hairdresser, the dog groomer and a beauty salon recently. I don't mind so much in those scenarios but where a service charge was already added I find it a monumental cheek.

flatfat · 14/04/2024 20:39

rookiemere · 14/04/2024 17:52

In the UK it's always been 10% for as long as I have had meals out ( in 50s). But recently I've noticed places with a pre added tip - particularly in London - have changed it to 12.5% which is annoying as the service certainly hasn't improved by 2.5%.

I'm Manchester based and I've noticed this too! A couple of times recently when we've been out and been given the card machine to pay the "optional" tip selection is already on 12.5% rather than 10%

Original poster
opticoner · 14/04/2024 21:22

I just feel very against tipping at the moment, I do generally tip where I am supposed to but I wish places just charged the proper amount to pay everyone a living wage and that decent service was the minimum.

@Trixiefirecracker I do tip as well but just the 10%. Everyone including wait staff should be on at least the minimum wage in the UK, the difference is that most other minimum wage jobs don't incur tips even those that involve service, hard work and unsociable hours. I do think everyone should get a living wage and not be reliant on tips. I don't think some leaving a £5 tip on a £5 coffee and cake really says that much about a person other than they can afford be free and easy with their money.

OP posts:
Usernamen · 14/04/2024 21:34

I long for the days when service charge was 10-12.5% everywhere in London. I am increasingly seeing 13.5-15% plus “cover charge” in some places.

I wouldn’t mind so much if the service had actually improved to match!

Usernamen · 14/04/2024 21:35

The other thing is, unlike the US, you can’t guarantee the staff get the service charge you’re paying. Lots of restaurants just pocket it (though they do have to pay NMW which is less of a thing in the US).

MariaVT65 · 14/04/2024 21:37

Trixiefirecracker · 14/04/2024 17:43

I tip. Unless service is shocking. I was a waitress and they earn shit wages and the tips are routinely shared between everyone do works out minimal but I often relied on my tips to make my job a living wage. I would tip a hairdresser too and a taxi driver etc. I think if you get good service and you like the food it’s nice to be appreciated. I did notice the ones who had the £100 plus meals never usually tipped but the little regular who had a coffee and a croissant would often leave almost as much as their whole meal was worth. Think it says a lot about a person.

It doesn’t say anything about a person. I don’t tip because many other professions earn minimum wage. It’s not fair that waitresses get tipped but GP receptionists and shop workers don’t for example. I trained as a bra fitter and didn’t get tipped but still earned minimum wage.

Bjorkdidit · 14/04/2024 21:42

Exactly. Retail staff never get tipped and often provide far more service than someone who takes your order, panics if you ask any questions about the food, brings you a plate of food, interrupts your meal to try and upsell things you don't want, then disappears when you want to pay.

DP used to work in a high end bike shop for NMW. He would spend ages helping people choose bikes and accessories that were suitable for what they wanted, assemble them and make sure they were adjusted for the purchaser, and do a six week check after they'd had the bike a few weeks. These people were spending thousands and about twice a year someone would bring in a crate of beer as a token of appreciation, but apart from that, never got a penny in tips.

Maverickess · 14/04/2024 21:51

opticoner · 14/04/2024 15:49

I'm not in London but it was a nicer than average place but we were also not drinking alcohol so we just ate our meal and left to go to the cinema.

Thanks everyone, I do feel that we were right to be a bit miffed at her expectation to keep all the change and that it does seem like tip expectations are creeping up. I'm not opposed to tipping or for servers getting a higher wage (I understand it can be a tough job) and prices increasing to cover that, as that would be fairer on the customer as well if we didn't have to tip on top of that. Everything would be up front and transparent.

The thing is I worked a tough job when I was younger for minimum wage, you were on your feet all day in hot conditions and had to be "on" constantly to avoid mistakes and I did it for £5 an hour no tips. While she seemed to expect to make probably more than her hourly rate in a single tip. I suppose she may share tips with kitchen staff which would bring that down but I still think just charge what it costs to pay your staff well enough to live and then let customers decide for themselves if they can afford to pay that and if the food and experience is worth it to them.

Edited

You're not unreasonable, I'm older and managerial level in hospitality and I have noticed a trend in younger staff about expecting tips as standard.
Way back when I was that younger staff, it was a big no-no and you always returned the change and were then given a tip, or were told what to round up to, the default was to return the change, not keep it and assume.

Unfortunately though, charging higher prices quite often leads to accusations of greed, we pay above average for most roles, and we're considered expensive compared to similar places. People do comment on it and some call it greed - not one person who has raised this with me has ever considered that our staff are paid a better wage and that's why our prices are what they are and we don't have a service charge - the wage is built into the price of the food, as you say, transparent and tips are not expected, accepted with gratitude if given, but not expected, yet our company is assumed to be greedy for charging what we do, and in all honesty when I've said that we pay above average wages (meaning service is better than average and we're better staffed) it seems to be resented rather than accepted as you think it would be.

Sadly I just think it's a job that people don't think is worth much - despite high expectations of levels of service, there's almost an attitude of you only get what I think you're worth, rather than being paid a fair wage.