No sleep

[strugglemama]

I've been up for almost 3h now with my 20 month old. He just won't fecking sleep. It's like this every single night, he's always been a bad sleeper and I'm exhausted and want to pack my bags and never come back.

Not looking for advice, I've tried everything already, it's just the way he is. Just need a rant and a hand hold as I'm about to lose my shit.

I honestly feel your pain. I'm trying to get my 5 year old back to sleep right now. My two kids gave me years of sleeping problems. They're not 8 and 5 and generally sleep ok now, it's been a while since I've been up at this time.

I can't offer any suggestions, I honestly think some parents win the sleep lottery and some lose it really badly. Friends of ours with kids the same age have never had any problems with sleep since their babies stopped waking for a night feed yet we spent years like walking zombies.

Are you able to spread the load with partner? Take turns at who is up during the night or base it round respective working patterns? Are you able to get any help from family, even during the day so you can rest?

Sleep deprivation is incredibly difficult to live with.

I have a child who is a bad sleeper, that's why I'm awake now. I find that the more I just accept it and stop fighting it then it feels better and less of a battle.

This has tickled me.

I remember bf my DC and being awake all night. One night, I looked at my son and it felt like we were the only people in the world. I felt so much love for him.

Now, both DC have long since flown the nest and I'm awake all night still, but I'm on my own!

OP, as much as you're tearing your hair out, treasure these moments because you will look back and miss them.

Thanks all. Unfortunately, I don't have any support so it's all on me. It really sucks but that's the way it is.

I totally agree regarding just accepting it and not fighting - it does make matters a bit easier. I know it's not his fault and he's not doing it deliberately, but it's still bloody awful when you're already shattered and are not allowed to sleep. It feels like torture. Sure, I'll miss him being little and needing me, but I'm sure as hell I won't miss these nights.