I always made a point of never asking when they were younger, but accepting if they initiated. Now they're grown ups I suppose I could ask-but I'm still a bit wary. I don't want to put them in the position of having to say yes. However-I'm not sure what to do about ds's partner. They live together, and it's a lovely solid relationship. We live quite close and we see each other quite often-initiated about equally by them and us. We have fun and I'm pretty sure she likes us. But I don't have her number or FB or anything. We do communicate-but always through DS. Even trivial things like he'll message "X says Wordle made her laugh today-it made her think of you!" "X says can she have your recipe for gingerbread" "X says have you got time for a coffee to talk about her essay" (those are real examples from the last couple of days) Is this usual? Would I be pushy to ask for her number? I am as sure as it's possible to be about another person that it's not him being controlling. Which I would probably think if someone else told me this story. But she spends time with his sister, who has first hand knowledge of controlling, so....
Is this