Any advice to prepare for breastfeeding?

[XxLondonxX]

Hi,

I would absolutely love some tips on please and also advice if there's anything I can do to encourage production before the baby arrives?

I wanted to breastfeed my first born but had a pretty horrible time post birth. The baby was uninterested in the breast, I didn't find my midwifery team helpful at all with feeding and when I tried expressing I found it very painful and hardly produced anything - I think because I had been pretty unwell post birth. Whilst I'm not ashamed of using formula first time round I would really love to breastfeed this time. Is there anything I can do to try and have a smoother ride this time around?

Tips/tricks/products would be appreciated!

I would recommend trying to express colostrum before the baby is born - think this is not advised until 36/37 weeks as it can induce labour (added bonus!) I didn’t do this first time round, baby wouldn’t latch and so I was trying to express (which took like an hour each time), then feed it to baby (another half hour/hour), then they’d go to sleep and an hour later the cycle would start again!!! I found it very stressful and swore it would be different wit my second. This time round I expressed lots from 37 weeks onwards and froze it, so if baby wouldn’t latch I had some ready to go. Of course, this time round he latched fine and it wasn’t necessary!

Make sure you understand normal breastfeeding behaviours and what is normal weight loss on day 5. Research, join breastfeeding fb groups, maybe a video consultation with lactation consultant. A lot of them are inclusively priced and if you send them an email will let you pay for a half hour chat over zoom or whatsapp

I say this because there is SO MUCH misinformation and you can’t rely on leaving the hospital with the correct stuff.

lots of HV honestly can’t be arsed and just advise formula top ups even if the day 5 weight loss is completely normal. A bit of jaundice is also normal in a bf baby and will usually sort itself out.

Based on my friends, and anecdotally on here- you will see people say they didn’t have enough milk because baby was acting hungry and wouldn’t stop feeding…….which is normal cluster feeding behaviour whilst they establish your milk supply. A constantly feeding baby does not mean you have ‘no milk’. There is no way of telling if you have ‘enough milk’.

focus on output- if they are having regular wet nappies- all good. Pumping is no indication of ‘how much’ you have. I only could pump about 2oz from each boob. Feeding past 2 now with no issues.

re: weight loss- they like them to lose no more than 10% but my baby lost around 12%. My lactation consultant (ex midwife) said this happens and encouraged me to just persevere and keep an eye on output, and surely enough- baby regained weight by day 14 and then just kept growing from there

meanwhile my friend stopped breastfeeding after a week due to be guilted by health visitors and family members for a COMPLETELY NORMAL 7% weight loss on day 5. Her baby is thriving and happy and completely well, no harm done- but she wanted to bf and she wasn’t supported.

a bit garbled- but what I’m trying to say is INFORMED is best. Clue yourself up with what is normal and what is to be expected because as you have experienced, despite people moaning about the apparent ‘Breastapo’….NHS provision is absolutely shite depending on area.

Find out where your local breastfeeding support group is, the one near me was called "Baby Cafe" but probably varies by area. My local NCT lady came round to help me with breastfeeding in the early days too - I struggled with my first as I had a section under general anaesthetic and was ill for days afterwards but managed to establish with her support. When the baby arrives, someone else feeds you and brings you drinks and changes the baby - your job is just to feed the baby at first while you recover from the birth. To get supply established, it's normal to feel like you have a baby attached to your boob for most of the time!
Good luck x

Lanisoh ointment. That is my singular piece of advice to any new parent. Worth its weight in gold.

Look up breastfeeding bistros for support - my local ones are run by HomeStart

Buy lansinoh cream - it's fab

Be kind to yourself. I thought breastfeeding would be easy because it's what our bodies are designed for and when it wasn't I struggled. It's a skill you (and baby) have to learn

Consider co-sleeping and definitely stay in bed/on sofa while you establish feeding.

www.kellymom.com is a brilliant source of of info.

Babies feed at night to boost milk supply, it’s when prolactin is highest. Don’t try to get your baby sleeping through, feeding at night is key to establishing supply.

Good luck!

My biggest tip I would give myself if I could do it all again was be kind to myself. I BF my son until he was 9 months old. I hardly produced any milk so he fed every 90 mins constantly!!!! But the guilt I felt wouldn't let me stop as "breast is best!!" It was the most horrendous time. Now I wished I had stopped months before. I have very small breasts and everyone kept saying you'll produce what baby needs. Well I fucking didn't!!! But I wouldn't stop as I couldn't live with the guilt.
So if it doesn't work out, don't be a martyr like I was. I didn't fail my son by not producing enough. But I probably did in a way by not listening to my body.

Nipple balm, a hakaa silicone pump and an electric pump incase you make too much milk like I did! Lots of muslins to shove down your top, bamboo breast pads I found the best (disposable ones were itchy for me)! I loved milky tee breastfeeding tops, and feed on demand whenever baby starts rooting (my in laws didn’t quite get this bit, they wanted to try settle her first etc but the earlier you can latch them on before they get too upset the easier it is I found!

Expect it to be painful and difficult at first - it can be upsetting in the first weeks if it doesn't seem to be going well. You really do need time to get it established, and for your nipples to stop hurting/bleeding (if you're really unlucky 😬). But these are all 'teething' problems and things DO get easier eventually - understanding this will help you to manage better emotionally.

I always think that if you're breastfeeding, in the first couple of months (while you and your body are adapting) you need to absolutely prioritise eating, drinking and sleeping because if any of these is lacking your milk supply can be affected, which is the last thing you need if there are other issues.

(I had a lidded cup with a straw so I could drink while breastfeeding - I found it really helped with my let down reflex).

Hi OP
I had wanted to breastfeed my eldest but like you we had a tough time in labour and were both poorly afterwards. She had no feeding instincts and never latched once.
I really wanted to be able to BF my second and we're now at 19 months! So it absolutely can be done.
In pregnancy I tried to hand express colostrum but it never happened for me and didn't prove to be a problem.
Luck played a part in that second time around I had a lovely water birth. My midwife helped him latch shortly after but we then had lots of problems getting him to latch. I persevered and did use formula top ups when needed in the hospital - that doesn't have to spell the end of breastfeeding. It can be a tool, or was for me, when getting established.
Things that helped:- online videos - YouTube Bridget Teyler, Global Health Media project and Instagram especially olivialactationconsultant helped me feel knowledgeable. I also found a local support group in advance. Buy some lansinoh. That was essential in those first weeks. Also for me breastfeeding hurt at first. I had my latch checked multiple times. I just had flatter nipples. Just had to get through it.
Good luck!

Like other posters have said, make sure you are informed as possible.
I had good breastfeeding support from NCT and other mothers within that group, and a few friends who had breastfed successfully. Find out who you know who has done it and ask their advice, most women are more than happy to help, especially with things like positioning.
Realise that you could well spend almost all your time feeding on some days, and make sure you are geared up for that, that you've got supplies of snacks and easy meals, and if possible people on hand who might take DC1 out on park trips etc while you conserve your strength on the sofa .
I found trying to express in the early days bit of a waste of time, but these are really useful worn inside a bra to catch leaks these .

Oh yes, and be aware that the let down reflex can be really painful but only for a very short burst of time, about a minute. It's normal, doesn't mean anything is wrong.

I agree lansinoh. My top tip is have some small bottles of pre made formula and give it two or three times when your baby gets really hungry in the few days before your milk comes in.

My SIL gave me great advice (tbh I haven't read others advice above so this may be a repeat) she said - it may come easy to you and that's great but... in case it's hard like it was for her (and for me btw) if you really want this don't give up too soon as the first 2-3 weeks she found it hard then by week 4 she thought I'm neither loving it or hating it but by week 8-12 she found she was totally in the swing of it and it's the best thing ever - I completely agreed with her - I found so many things clicked at maybe week 10 - and I was so sad to stop which if you had asked me in the first 2 weeks I would have never believed it! So - others may have more practical how-to advice but my advice is more simple - don't give up at the start!

I'd say don't be discouraged if you do need to top up with formula at any point.

I had to at week 3 when my little one got RSV and I was so worried that doing this would "kill my supply" and I'd have to stop BF.

I did have to pump a lot, but thankfully after a few weeks, I was back to just BF.

I found the first 6-8 weeks really tough as she had a tough time latching and her weight gain wasn't great.
Since then, BF has been such a breeze and I'm so glad I persevered. I hated the faff of preparing bottles and the mental load of preparing them before going out.

Loads of great advice so far. I agree with the advice of research, research, research. Look at what support is available locally and see if you can reach out before baby is here.

I could barely express a drop (and I tried really hard as #2 child was prem in NICU) but I successfully breastfed #1 for 20 months and #2 for 16 months.

At antenatal classes the midwife said breastfeeding isn't meant to hurt. Big fat lie until you and your nipples get used to it! You and your baby will be brand new to breastfeeding, even when I had #2 child the midwife had to remind me he was different to #1 and he had to learn how to feed. Very good advice.

Cluster feeding in the evening is totally normal. Park yourself on the couch with a cup of tea (in a keep warm flask), a box set and just feed baby. Eat dinner before you sit down! Dad will need to be in charge of bedtime for your eldest.

Make sure you are well fed and hydrated. I had a snack box next to my bed as I was awake often through the night. I'd eat flapjacks or some such when awake in the night.

You might need to think about how you can entertain the eldest while you feed the baby. Maybe have separate sticker books or toys that only come out when feeding baby, or watch a special programme together. Make the most of other pairs of hands in the early days to either entertain the eldest, or take the baby so you can be with the eldest 1:1.

All the best!

(In addition to the above)

Buy a massive water bottle that you can use one-handed. With both of my babies, the second my milk let down I felt like I was about to die of thirst.

If you have a bf-related problem, don't use MN or similar public forum to ask advice. It'll descend into debate or judgement. Stick to bf specific advice groups e.g. breastfeeding babies fb group and breastfeeding babies 1year and beyond fb group.

Well Done you! This is so.good to hear. Thanks for the advice :-)

Be prepared that if you get a very hot swollen boob it might be an abscess. That's what happened to me despite my HV and the breast feeding support line telling me it almost definitely wasn't because they're very rare. This lead me to seeking treatment far too late and it basically ruined BF for me. I had to have the abscesses drained in hospital 10 times!