Just had a retirement rehearsal, loved it and now can't face work

[LittlePrecious]

I've been off work for 11 days. It's the first hefty period of leave I've had in ages that hasn't involved travel, visitors, a big celebration, several nights of events or outings etc.

It was just 11 days at home with DP, normal food and drink, and chilled activities. I loved it. It felt like a rehearsal for retirement and now I can't face going back to work tomorrow 😫

I have epic Sunday night feelings which I haven't had since primary school 🙃 I don't hate my job at all and I'm WFH also permanently for the next six months. So not all bad AT ALL.

But still, how can I psych myself up for work tomorrow and the next million years ?

Remind yourself that you are contributing to your pension, which you will need to pay for everything once you retire. Also savings, that will go down without work.

Then just put your big girl pants on go forth.

I didn't go back after mat leave for this very reason (plus the small baby of course 😬) so I have no idea <helpful> can you use your leave to schedule the next break to make it feel easier..?

How long until you retire?

I know, big girl pants on and think of the money 😄 We did a savings/investment overview yesterday which was Headache inducing nice to see that working does pay off 🤣

I'm retiring in no more than twelve years. There's a very real possibility that it could be a bit/a lot sooner but twelve years absolutely maximum!

Booking my next fat period of leave is the first thing on my "To Do" list tomorrow 😆

I only had 6 days off but feel the same. I also wfh full time so no commue or having to dress up and do office chit chat but my job is tedious and repetitive and political, but I can't leave as it pays well and I'm beefing up my pension as much as possible. I could quite happily spend my days pootling around my home, cooking, cleaning, gardening and shopping without ever getting bored I reckon. I'm only early 50s though so need to keep going for at least another 15 years...sigh.

Exactly so. I want to travel and have adventures during my retirement but I also want to bimble, bumble and just be.

That's what I've enjoyed most about this period of leave- no rushing, no pressure, no great adventures. Just enjoying time.

I had four months off after redundancy and could absolutely see what retirement might be like. I'm glad to be back working now but DH and I are going to be seriously talking during this year about how soon we could retire (although it will be a way off as I'm 44).

Gosh, I'd definitely struggle to go back after four months off.

Me and DP spent most of yesterday (his last day off, my penultimate day off) modelling retirement scenarios 😂It's fun to see how close it could be!

I keep watching these videos online on tiktok and youtube with younger people going off grid because everything is too expensive and they don't want to be a corporate slave. They're merrily building wooden houses with solar panels with outhouses, collecting water from a stream and growing veg. It looks magical.

Realistically I can only do 4 days camping before I start moaning and that's with electric hook up so no chance I could ever do it but it's lovely to fantasise!

I've never been camping 😂 I think I'd actually prefer working than living in a tiny hut in the woods for years!

Its about where you draw the line isn't it?

Me and DP could retire in five-ish years but it wouldn't be the retirement I'm hoping for - would be fine but we'd need to budget quite carefully and would be at the whim of changing economic circumstances like energy prices etc.

If we worked another thirty years we could retire in absolute luxury and never give money a second thought.

It's finding the right, sweet spot in the middle that's key!

It's pretty normal to feel like that with any holiday, but I guess with WFH you don't get that nice thing of going back into the office and finding out what everyone else has been up to, having a quick chat about what you did etc. That always makes going back easier IMO. I always find once I've done that and gone through my inbox I'm settled back into work mode again. Does help to book some more leave to look forward to though.

To be honest, WFH is the only thing keeping me from writing a "Fuck You, I Quit" letter 🤣

The idea of commuting to work tomorrow, finding out what everyone else has been up to and having a chat about what I did makes me want to boil my own head in tar 😆😆😆😆😆

The thought of WFH had the same effect on me, I'd definitely want to retire if I had to do that.

When I was in my 20s and 30s I loved socialising with my office buddies, traveling the world and interesting projects with high pressure deadlines. Then I had kids, then I got tired and 50 odd and now I have plenty of friends and don't give a flying fuck what Steve in accounts got up to over the Easter break. Could never go back to working in an office ft.

Ah, I'm late 50s but still really like my colleagues, I don't socialise with them outside of work or work events and do have plenty of other friends but we genuinely all love each other's company, I look forward to seeing them every Monday morning. I would never take a WFH job.

Perhaps try to view this as a lesson that you need more down-time? Regular weekends doing nothing much, an annual break like this at home.

I realised last year that I was doing too much over the summer, even though they were things I loved and enjoyed. I've deliberately scaled down a bit this year.

The latter part of your post is exactly how I feel. My colleagues are just a random bunch of strangers that happen to currently be paid by the same organisation as me. Absolutely nothing more. I don't give a shit about any of their lives and I don't wish to share any details of mine with them.

I'm an antisocial cowbag though 😂

That's really nice. I despise most of my colleagues 😂😂😂😂

Yes, me and DP said exactly that over our annual leave! We're going to make sure we take every weekend fully off work, say "no" to more things, and make more time for boring stuff like jigsaws, board games, ambling with the dog etc.

When I hit my early 50s I got to a point where I felt exactly as you do now and DH felt the same. Try as we might we couldn't get back from feeling like that.

We were going nuts contemplating another 15 years of that so we had a radical rethink. We downsized and partially retired. Instead of carrying on in the corporate world we retrained and started a business which we run together now, but only part time. The rest of the time we bimble and enjoy a smaller, quieter life. It's bloody amazing.

There is a halfway house and I hope you find your sweet spot.

Retirement is the best. It's the only time in your whole life when you can choose how to spend your time.

I would factor in working reduced hours if you can as that work/life balance makes such a difference but also allows you to keep working and putting money away.

Thank you @Churchview and @WallaceinAnderland for your perspectives on working in a different way. That's really valuable to think about. DP has lots of scope for scaling back his job and doing more consultancy work which would let him work in a very different way. I don't really have the same option in my area unfortunately. I don't think I'd be allowed to drop down to PT either. But I definitely could take a step back from work - just not put as much time or emotional energy into it

I've just had four months off as well after redundancy.

Completely changed sector and gone for a less senior role and couldn't be happier to be back.

I found wfh full time stultifying.

I think it's wonderful that you will be happy with all that unstructured time and with the company of your husband. So many people dread those things, so it is fantastic that they make you so full of joy!

Yes I've completely change industry and job role and I'm loving the complete change. Definitely made me enjoy having to work again 😉