Is anyone else totally shocked by their own age?

[Darkdiamond]

I feel like the last time I checked, I was around 29. I'm now 41 and feel like I've lost a decade! I've young kids, including a toddler so have spent the past 9 years pregnant, breastfeeding and in the thick of nappies, potty training, Paw Patrol and all things Young Kids. It has kid of blindsided me to the fact that I'm actually middle aged. In my head I'm late twenties and feel like things have been on pause since then (in a good way). I have friends around the same age with teenagers, kids at uni etc and I honestly don't think I'm old enough for that to even be possible, but it is? I was brushing my hair and caught sight of my hands and noticed they have aged a lot. Then I thought, yeah but you're in your 40s now! I'm still having regular periods, just stopped breastfeeding 6 months ago and I just don't feel any different!

Anybody else?

I got my first State Pension payment last week.

I feel like a fraud. A mistake has been made somewhere.......

I can totally relate. Realising my mum is now the age my grandmother (her mother) was not long before she died, that doesn’t seem possible.

In my mind my grandmother was full of life, but also comfortingly old and just always appeared that way when I knew her. When I look at my mum though, it’s like looking at overlaid images of all the ages she has been since I’ve known her. She can’t be 80, as I can also see her as a 40 year old. Then I think of my kids looking at me, and wondering what face they might see in another 30 years, and how much they will remember of the me as I am now.

Time can really mess with your head if you think about it too much 😅

40 this year. I remember my mum turning 40 and thinking then how old she was 😫

I remember at university how long the years felt, in a good way. My undergraduate degree felt like it took forever, and with plenty of time for everything - chatting for hours, endless relationship analysis, going out, genuinely enjoying my course, travel opportunities.

These days, even what I enjoy goes by so quickly. Each year I hold tight to the time until the October midterm (hand term) as the time from September to end October is the only time of the year (both with my DC, and in work (work in a university), that goes slowly. After that, time hurtles to Christmas, midterm, St Patrick's Day, Easter, exam time & summer holidays. And then it's a new year!

I'm 55 this year and all I keep thinking is 5 years till 60! I can't compute that at all.

For me though it's more I can't fathom how my DC got older! I had them young so they are 33 and 34 (nearly 35). I think once they hit 40 it will just floor me! They're still young adults in my mind (I'm talking early 20s rather than 30s) but once they hit 40 it's going to feel weird as they'll be headed into middle aged themselves.

The 90's were 10 years ago.

That is my story and I'm sticking with it.

I know the feeling. Recently someone was talking about “thirty years ago” and my mind immediately went to the 70s, but of course they were actually talking about 1994!

I'm not really shocked about my age. I'm 46, which still feels like a relatively young age, especially as I don't really feel any different than I did when I was 30.

What does shock me is how long ago things are! How is it 30 years since GCSEs FFS?!

I moved out of home when I was 19. I've now lived away from my parents for 8 years longer than I ever lived with them!

@EarringsandLipstick thank you. You're so kind x

I'm in my 70s and find it a confusing decade. I feel I'm supposed to be dignified and elegant now, but I act younger, as I don't feel my age. How am I supposed to dress? I prefer casual clothes, leggings and jeans mostly, but that seems wrong somehow . Luckily I'm quite healthy and reasonably fit but in my mind I'm still in my 40s, even though I have adult grandchildren!

I also think covid lockdowns weirded everyone's age. Like surely those birthdays don't count... so we can all knock at least 2 years off.

Oh god yes. I’m 47 and in total denial. I just can’t bear it. I keep thinking I’m a 20-something and am constantly shocked that a celebrity or neighbour who I think of as older is actually younger than me - sometimes by a decade. I hate ageing. I hate everything about it. I hate the way young, beautiful people look straight through me. I hate catching my reflection in a shop window or mirror and being shocked by the grey, sagging, pasty, ill-looking old woman gazing back at me. And I hate the feeling that I’m supposed to be strong and wise and in control, when in reality I’m angry, unfulfilled, and full of regret.

There’s a line in a Philip Larkin poem, where he describes how “attention passes always to the young.” When you’re young, everyone is interested in you. As you age, no one cares what you do. The world is made for the young. The other awful thing about ageing is the loss of hope. You’re not going anywhere anymore. And to make it all even worse, time speeds up. It’s like being tortured.

I'm 57, I don't know how that happened? I've only just been born 😫

I am also 41 @Darkdiamond

When I see people on tv (or real life) and I know they are in their 40’s I think they are so mature and often look great in clothes, look well put together.

In my head I think, god they are so adult 😄😂 as I still think I am in my 20’s

Then I look in the mirro, no grey yet but def some signs of age!! Horrified yes. Definitely.

71 here, last time I checked I was 28.

Yes! The other day at a friend's house I commented on a lovely painting and she said it was her husband's gift for his 50th. I said, "oh [name] is 50 ?" and she laughed and said, "yeah, and the rest!" (I think he's 54.) In my head I am about 29 so even someone I know is older than I can only be about 40...

When I read about 43 year olds in the paper, I think, oh, that grown-up person did x, y, z and never make the rapport that I too am 43.

I am nearly 58 and think how? Where has time gone? 2 years to retirement and wow I will be 60! I don't feel or look that old but hell time flies...

Yes, turned 58 and last parent had sadly died and child off to Uni all within a year . How did I get to 58 !

Yes!
55, how the hell have I lived this long?
I don't feel it, then I get Fb 'memories' pop up from when the kids were teenagers and that makes me remember how much has happened, specially in the last 5 years.

Yes. I'll be 59 tomorrow. Nearly 60. My mother died at 62, feeling a bit worried 😟. Only seems like 5 minutes ago I was 30.

I'm 60 soon ..... how did that happen?

Wait till you hit 70.
You'll wonder how that happened, how you got here without noticing.

Well I’ve already had my third driving licence renewal……. How come when it’s surely only only twenty years since I passed my test at 17 🤔
Reading this thread makes me think I’m the Methuselah of Mumsnet.

My aunty recently said she hopes she's alive to see ds turn 18, which is 4 years away. I kind of laughed, then realised that she's 83 and has already lived longer than anyone else on the side of the family. She's still in her 40s to me. Which is impossible, becauseI'm in my 40s.

On the plus side, I was referred to as 'that young woman with the lovely figure' by an older lady, when I was out running today, which made my day! It's what I tend to think when I see 20 yr olds, so it's all relative.

Threads like this always make me think. I'm hurtling towards 40 at a surprising rate (😣) and we're currently trying to decide what our next move will be, as we want to move area next year. It's between a safe option or slight adventure lol. I'm trying desperately hard not to end up full of regrets for not living the life I wanted to, but it's hard when every year is another year I haven't scuba dived or lived in New Zealand or attended the Oscars lol. So thank you for the prompt not to just let life slide into mediocrity because it's easier and safer. We really want to take that leap and have an adventure but it's hard with two young kids to think of too.

People who are 60+, what do you really regret not doing when you were a bit younger? Because I'm aware of the years passing by horrifically quickly!