Thought my fish was dead 😪 sorry long post

[Bluebellsinthewind]

Came home from a short UK break a few days ago. I couldn't find my fish in its tank, then the poor thing struggled to swim to me and looked liked it had minutes to go. I was in absolute bits crying and felt helpless. My son give me this fish as a present a few years ago. I am wfh and me the fish and dog have daily routines. Thankfully after a few days the fish is fine.

However, a few days after the fish episode, a distant aunt sent me a dm to say that my grandmother had passed away a few days earlier. Nothing, absolute nothing, I felt no emotion. My grandmother was horrible to me such an unloving and bullying person. I went nc with her over ten years ago.

And yet my head is still a mess and I can't sleep. Isn't it sad to live a life and treat someone horrible that when you die they feel nothing.

I just need to get this all out.

Handhold here OP. I’m sorry for your loss. For what it’s worth given the circumstances and the fact that grief affects everyone differently it’s okay to not feel anything at all. This may or may not change but that’s okay too. I think it’s true in life where they say that you reap what you sow. Situations like this hit home the importance of treating people with respect and I’m sorry a woman who was supposed to show you love and kindness didn’t. That’s no reflection on you at all. I’m very glad your fish is doing okay.